Thoughts on the negative polarity.

Wisdom I have gained. That I suppose I didn't really seek in the strict definition of the word. I read the first few sessions of the Law of One. Some of which I may make the commitment to never read again. 

If you can take enough notes from the small positive comments in the first sessions. Then perhaps I simply don't need to re read the first few sessions of the Law of One. All those questions about the ways that the Orion group operate and all that. 

But anyway, here are my insights that I gained recently from these sorts of sources. And from a few coincidental X posts and things. 

Firstly, thoughts on "transcient" material and mental health.

Years and years ago I heard the term 'transcient' from the Law of One, and I did not understand on a deep level what precise aspect of this kind of material it was that was so negative. That has a negative effect on the person reading it. 

But now I have looked at philosophy a fair bit, I do understand, I believe. I believe that mental health is best served by having things that we believe, that we can trace back in our minds. This can be from either objective or subjective sources. So, the difference between masculinity and femininity. We can trace these back through things we observe every day. Men are stronger than women, as an example. But also through things like evolutionary psychology. An even better basis would be a logical theory that makes sense.

If we doubt a thing, and it is good to doubt. We can go back and find it's first principle of some description. Obviously if this is successful and has lead to rules that are positive and truthful. We can then apply these and get good results. These can also bring clarity to very subjective things we might experience.

So as an example. I might believe I should love someone and find myself not loving that person. But I can backtrack the theory of something and think through 'Love is the involuntary response to virtue if we are virtuous'. The important thing here might be the word 'involuntary'. If a feeling of love has changed, we might feel obligated to keep it going. But if the person involved has displayed obvious lack of virtue. Then that logical rule might allow us to accept our subjective experience.

With transcient information though. With information on how evil operates and such like that. We cannot go back and actually understand it. Theoretical information might be OK. We can observe in small ways if a friend of ours goes more service to self than we would prefer. But a lot of the truly transcient information. "The US government has 500 space ships that it keeps behind". There is at once, absolutely no way we can confirm this. If we start to doubt it. But also, a whole load of other things that go with this. Such as an anxiety about our survival if such secrets are kept from us. A rage that healing technology is kept behind if we are unwell or in the case of the death or illness of loved ones. 

There are also other people that want to keep such things secret. 

But more than that. We cannot go back to first principles on any of these issues. And if we cannot go back to first principles. Then what are we substituting that with? Well, a kind of faith. And not the ideal faith either. People cannot objectively confirm the presence of "The One Infinite Creator". But when they engage in thinking about it. When they draw comfort from it. This is all very positive stuff that feels like it is confirmed subjectively. That the US government is keeping behind 500 space ships cannot be confirmed subjectively. The 'feel' of the information is of a darkness that is not easy to connect with. 

Understanding of the Service to Self.

Nevertheless, we do live in a world where the presence of the service to self is relevant to our everyday existence. If what the Q people of the world believe is going to happen does happen. One day this will all be extremely important to know. Because, to have some understanding of this area is a better psychological basis for handling shock when that information 'becomes a suppository' so to speak. When understanding of these issues becomes mainstream. 

As mentioned before. A lot of things seem to be coming to a head at the moment. This is potentially because Trump is pushing forward by allowing Julian Assange free reign. Who has apparently only released 3% so far of what he has to release. And that 3% was very devastating. It is possible that the information to be released will jail some very powerful people. 

Very powerful people. Like left wing politicians in the UK. Whom simply ignore the fact that the people they are importing are raping and killing the citizens. Whom give tax payer funded hotel stays and all sorts of welfare to immigrants while the native population lives in poverty. 

Recently when there were protests to stop those immigrants coming in. The UK government gave them something like a 40 car police presence to fill up the coaches and transport the immigrants further inland. When police are not generally available to the native population for serious crimes against them.  

This is like a few other times I recall. A few other issues. Such as transgenders in Hollywood. At a certain point the actions of the Service to Self becomes... unfathomable. There really isn't a clear reason why almost all the Hollywood celebrities would be transgender. It is a level of confusing sickness that makes no sense. 

The Law of One though, tells a story that when negative ET's are patrolling our society. They seek out people of the same vibration of themselves. People that live on this planet, as humans. Who are just unfathomably evil. These ET's then visit these people and engage with them somehow, tell them what to do. 

The way it seems like it is with the Service to Self. Is that, these people. These left wing politicians and things. They just receive orders and do those things. There is no larger awareness of what the agenda is. And the agenda that is set by these negative beings is so evil that it cannot be plumbed by service to others people I don't suspect. 

So this was one insight I had and it has two important components: One, it accepts information based only on faith in the Law of One. Which is a less than idea way to process information. Rather than being able to go back on first principles on things you believe. Two, it necessitates not being further curious into things you only have a little information on. You have to switch off your curiousity on this kind of issue. Because you cannot go any further with it. Which is what you have to do with the service to self anyway. 

Another thing I read was from an excerpt about 'the committee of 300'. Which is a conspiracy theory that the secret rules of the world are only 300 people. This excerpt said that in their perfect world. Many people would be executed and of those that remained alive. They would be in a state of poverty. Food. Energy etc. And that when people needed something, if they received it, they would know that their survival was only based on the "mercy" or "will of the 300".

This absolutely fits with an understanding of what the service to self wants. While the service to others I think tends to want things to work properly and would not dream of restricting food to get 'narcissistic supply'. In general wants things to run properly and then not to be bothered. Except with perhaps ample profit to live their own life with their family. The service to self wants to kind of extract energy from people all the time so even simple things like the provision of food becomes a hero or god complex moment. 

But it does still give some understanding of their motives. For instance, the UK government is not opening up the North Sea which would give the population far better oil and a far richer country. If their agenda was widespread poverty for this reason. That would make sense.  

The Manifestor Confusion.

This is the video I am going to think over today:

Youtube: Richard Beaumont: Manifestors Often Forget This ONE Thing!

https://youtu.be/lXaKiwKxSrY?si=QarCG5BN48mKLF92 

A few weeks ago I wrote a few blogs starting with this same persons video on the Generator and what it means to "build" a persons life.

I really really hoped that Richard would not do one for the Manifestor. But I realised he probably would since he did one on the Generator and Projector and I was still curious. What he goes with here is simply the Manifestors strategy, stated strategy, or what substitutes for strategy. I.e. 'To inform'. For the other two types he went into what he has generally noticed about them. NOT their strategy. But, I get the feeling he doesn't really get Manifestors. I could be wrong.

So here was the comment I put, and then deleted. On that same video:

I don't completely agree with this. I suspect that Ra Uru Hu found through trial and error this to be the most important thing but I don't know whether it applies to all Manifestors as the most important thing. You can do it and you will still get other challenges.

Firstly, a fundamental assumption of the human design that I don't think is correct. Is that if we do our strategy and authority everything will work out properly. I don't think this is the case. I think we have to negotiate with the world and understand it a fair bit.

Case in point. For two years I was at a workplace where all the people there hated me. They would arrange work do's every week and I was the only one excluded for two straight years. In that circumstance. Any effort I made within the group the energy would be lost. They would gossip about me and reliably find the worst interpretation of any of my actions. I was not able to get another job during this time until the end of that period. I personally asked them out a fair few times and no one came. It did not matter what I did or whether I informed. My energy would go into the group and was never going to manifest anything.

I think the fundamental point of Ra Uru Hu's guidance was to be aware that you cannot, as a Manifestor, really perceive others. I can't either. But, at the same time. That world is full of energy and things like attendance to heirarchy that WILL effect you. Potentially, I hypothesize that every Manifestor needs to find their own particular weak spot in this regard. For Ra Uru Hu it was informing/ the lack thereof, but for another Manifestor it might be something else.

I can get in vicious arguments with people and not feel any particular anxiety or consider that the other person is effected by this. I carefully record the things that lead up to these arguments to get more understanding to inform me in future situations. But this also includes wisdom other than informing. For instance, with that office group. I had to accept that I could not oppose them. That I did not have the power, as one individual, to oppose that small office of 20 people. I had to withdraw my energies from the fight.

Also, the human design assumes a fairly healthy society I think. The manifestor, in todays world, is not necessarily likely to meet Generators that are eager to carry out their wishes. Regardless of how intelligent or interesting their potential impacts are. This is because the world is obsessed with power and a lot of people do not want to do a single thing to yield power. They do not want you to be in a position of greater power than them so will not allow the conversation to go in that direction. If you want to offer something from the human design as an example. Something you know about and they do not, they will not accept it to maintain power. Some people, will not even open up to basic questions like basic enquiries into how they are because they don't want to yield power.

So this is perhaps why Manifestors want power. Perhaps we all want power on some level. But the Manifestor sees the lack of power as a barrier to being able to manifest because of the animal heirarchy.

I think with Projectors as well you simply take from them if they willing to offer. Like Robert Greene and the 48 Laws of Power. Some will not want to offer of course. But Projectors want to be valued so you simply use them to help you understand others and value them for that. Job done. A good role model of a Manifestor that uses certain personality skills to get on with others is the fictional character Patrick Jane in the Mentalist played by Manifestor Simon Baker.

Still in it's youtube formatting I see. 

I then realised, a little after writing this, that the need for power would go into this interaction as well. I had poured my energy into this but it would not get any likes or positive responses. Because it inherently, because it is truthful, takes apart the conceptions that aid peoples power. That is, passive aggressive spiritual egalitarianism. So there was no use in leaving it on the video. 

Like I said in this comment. One of the things I find with human design is that it tries to bypass the awareness of the very flawed world we live in. One that is mixed in its polarities. 

Another point here is that Richard himself is very unlikely to give such a comment a like because it would place me in the position of being superior at advising Manifestors. But Richard is the guy that runs the Human Design business. So it is literally against his business interests to respond positively to the post.

Also, Richard does not, I don't think, really know what he is talking about here. It is unlikely that he intuitively arrived at the conclusion of making this video. But did it because he didn't want to leave the Manifestors out of the video series. Also, because it is his business, he is meant to be an expert on each type. 

So in a sense he is making the video to create the impression, falsely, that he can talk about Manifestors. Which also convinces Manifestors to come to him. So he is doing what in the video he says is impossible. Trying to control the Manifestor. 

Inspiration. 

I have had insights from my recent reading of the Law of One and other general insights into the negative polarity. I am seeing it far more clearly recently. I am not sure I really want to talk about this as a subject. It does feel dark and uncomfortable. It might also be relevant though.

Just a general thought.  

Spiritual problems, part 2, faith.

Wow, as I have described recently in blogs. For no clear reason. I have suddenly gotten a lot of stress. This includes me having not been able to sleep for a few consecutive days and other unusual symptoms. 

I am going to make a physical change in massively decreasing the time I spend at the gym. I was starting to get some momentum and enjoy it. But I was not able to get the protein requirements, 150 grams at minimum, usually more. I strained myself a bit. Starting off with fewer exercises after stretching perhaps. 

But psychologically. I am putting together something that might have caused me psychological difficulty that would also be in common with others that are on the same kind of pathway as me. I.e. spiritual, challenged to practice faith I believe. And also, having a basic understanding in belief in sources like Q. 

Psychological dissolution.

Two things that have personally had me lose a kind of back up faith I had before.

One: I am looking for work. This is a very dark and thankless task. Full of annoying things and contradictions. I also have problems from my medical condition. Including bone thinning and other things that might restrict my ability to do physical work. My last job was in a call centre/ office or admin environment. Even though the people that worked there did not like my personality. Or lack thereof since I was quite ill at the time. The work itself were things I was very able to do. I was very organised and attentive to customers. 

I have been getting emails for a while with manual labour types of jobs though. Jobs on production lines and unloading shipping containers and things. Things I assumed I couldn't do. But if I was really against the wall. Those are the kinds of jobs I felt like I should try and do as a last resort. In my mind, I figured. These are the jobs that women are not interested in. The reason I am not able to get a job is partly that the economy is just destroyed. But also, partly. That women are considered superior in the current society, and prioritised for jobs in the current job market. There is a lot of proof of this. In America, non farm payrolls for August show something like 92% of new jobs go to women. 

I also know this from going to job interviews and as my name shortened is gender neutral. I got a lot less, a lot less, zero even, job interviews after I headed my CV with the full name showing I am a man not a woman. I got job interviews every so often with the ambiguous name. 

I talked to someone in my life and realised, that even though the bone thinning does restrict my movement. I am actually capable of doing most of the shelf stacking kind of movements. This was a surprise to me. It's strange how possibilities are just deleted from consideration after you have dismissed them for some reason. I also am going to the gym obviously. So I decided to try and get one of those jobs. Well, I contacted the recruiter that was putting out those kinds of jobs and yeah, it was not as smooth sailing as I thought. In fact. The recruiter kind of lied to me in the conversation. Saying he had a lot of jobs he keeps back but in fact, he wanted to set me up with an unsuitable one I had already seen, he was obviously trying to find people for as he has resent that email quite a few times.

I suddenly discovered that no, there were not a lot of manual labour jobs waiting to be done so long as I would actually agree to do them. This area is as difficult as the rest of the economy.  

The second point is just the general wear and tear of jobseeking. The whole thing is becoming more and more fake. The jobs seem more and more fake. I used to only apply within my town. It is a large city. Now I actually apply outside of that to jobs that there is no practical reason I would be prioritised over someone that lives closer and has any other number of other beneficial reasons to hire. Younger for instance. Female. 

The entire thing is really strongly feeling like a farce recently. The jobseekers pretend to jobsearch, but don't think they will get a job. Some of them don't want a job. The jobs put up fake jobs. I don't know why. But it is probably incentivised by the government somehow to not reveal how badly they have destroyed the economy. The job boards put up these jobs knowing they are fake and the (overworked) Job Centre workers also pretend to do their jobs. They know the situation so just pretend to be productive. The whole thing is fake from beginning to end, but it takes a huge deal of time and emotional energy. 

Taken together these two I think represent a bit of a shock to my system. It is the realisation of a lack of hope, even a grim hope. That was there before. It makes money saving more important. I think this might be the stress I was referring to.

Faith and Q.

Recently, the Trump organisation has been putting out a LOT of Q posts. One of them was Dan Scavino putting out an image that was posted on a Q post on a delta (so same day on an earlier year. Part of Q code!) Another delta was simply "Julian Assange" on September 14th. And on September 17th Julian Assange posted: "I'm back".

There were a lot more hints than just this. That the Q stuff is soon going to kick off.

Also, on a global level. Something weird is clearly happening. Saudi Arabia had a swarm of drones destroy some of their oil infrastructure. No one has claimed credit for this. Ukraine has destroyed a few oil refineries and Saudi's have told Europe they will not supply them for October. There have been several airport shutdowns in the UK. 

What this leads to, is that security in my own life has dissolved a bit. But faith in Q, and a larger political reality, has had to increase. And that is not easy.  

Spiritual update.

I thought my last three articles were quite good. This one, I think, will not be up to that standard. I think it is useful and relevant to people that generally consider themselves "on the spiritual path" as a general reminder. 

Firstly. I talked about NoFap recently. I have found that going forward. It is not my intention to go NoFap during very difficult periods. When I can get to the gym NoFap is easy and it will likely be easy with other things as well. But when for whatever reason, strain or illness, I am not consistently going to the gym. Lying around a lot getting sexual thoughts and then, getting physical pain from being turned on and it not going anywhere. Well, in those times I consider it healthier to just release that energy.

I have experienced a health issue recently. What makes this one different to the others is that... I have no idea why this is. I am good, as anyone with a health condition usually is, at theorising what issue created an unexpected problem, but not this time. I had about four days back to back of insomnia. I slept 3- 4 hours for 3-4 days and felt dreadful. I am not completely caught up yet. 

I am also physically strained. The strain hasn't left me. It is weird it just goes nowhere. I have been getting random spots and things. Tiredness and other health issues. 

At first, I thought this was a physical problem. But it appears not to be. Handling the physicality of things solves nothing. Now I am starting to think it is a spiritual issue.

It could in truth be many things. I have calculated a few psychological shocks recently that could have impacted me. To do with money, work, and other issues.

But what I have settled on. What does seem to bring results. Is that I have let my spiritual practices lag a bit. I have decided I need to get back to being more on it with things like prayer. I have not prayed twice a day for a long time. I have prayed once a day most days. But there is a zeal towards spirituality that I have not felt in a while. I also specifically stop prayer or doing anything when things go wrong. I have a poor tolerance for pain in that regard. But this is not the Law of One way. Carla carried on praying and doing affirmations, doing other things, while she was in a very bad state. 

I bring it up partially as I think this is a reminder to everyone. This is what priests are for. Just to re- remind us of the basics all the time. 

The types in context. 3rd and final part.

Following on from the 2 previous blog entries then.

Part 1 - I mentioned the proposition from a video that the human design Generator is here to 'build' their lives.

Part 2 - Through the medium of actors, I discussed the Projector, and how this differs from the Generators type. 

For this part. I want to extend out that same argument, and focus on Manifestors, of which there are few. 

Actor Manifestors:

• Anna Torv - Olivia Dunham - Fringe.
• John C McGinley - Dr Cox - Scrubs.
• Simon Baker - Patrick Jane - The Mentalist
• Jennifer Lawrence - A range of movies including The Hunger Games. 
• Jennifer Aniston - F.R.I.E.N.D.S and a few movies. I have not seen a lot of this woman. 
• Johnny Depp - Captain Jack Sparrow - Pirates of the Caribbean.  
• Chad Boswick - known from the Black Panther movies.
• Jodie Comer in Killing Eve. 

Here is the Black Panther Trailer for reference:

https://youtu.be/xjDjIWPwcPU?si=r3wLu18ahmo03g33 

And that's it. I was not kidding when I said they are thin on the ground. Not one of the charts I have done for Stargate, Buffy the Vampire Slayer or Angel, Star Trek DS9 or Voyager. I have typically done all of the actors in the past. More recently only a few. 

It is not known the reason obviously that Manifestors are kept out of these things. But firstly, what can we learn from these characters in general. What can we correlate here?

The first thing that sticks out to me is that each of these characters is specifically skilled. They are effectively 'set apart' from everyone else due to that skill. Anna Torv's character has special abilities and a photographic memory. Dr Cox is an extremely good medical practitioner that the other characters look up to. Simon Baker in the Mentalist shows a very eccentric and genius detective that solves crimes incredibly quickly. Even Captain Jack Sparrow is interesting because he is so good at escaping. 

I think this might be why the Manifestors are kept out of shows like 'Star Trek Voyager'. Voyager, in somewhat of a liberal fashion actually. (Although politics is missing from the show!) Has this idea that the competence of the characters does not effect the characters personality. In this way they all have the "respect" of being super competent. But they do not display these characteristics. Harry Kim is meant to be a genius but he is aggressively average. Tom Paris is meant to be a passionate, genius, rogue and he does not display a great deal of fire. 

Captain Janeway is a little convincing. But what it takes to be a real genius in a real meritocracy is... disagreeableness. This is because if you follow the data and get to decent points. Learn things. The way you know you have hit something that is important and real is if you tell it to someone "normal" and they say... "I don't agree with that because it doesn't feel right". 

The Dr Cox character is the best at what he does partly because he is so disagreeable. While J.D has a social life. He has priorities outside work. Dr Cox does not. 

Patrick Janes character is positively rude and acerbic to most people. He is kind of refined and polite. But then if he needs to catch people will just run roughshod over people for strategic reasons. Including being extremely insulting. He goes to sleep on shift and does what he likes. Since he gets results, people have to put up with it. 

These features are simply not good for a Star Trek show. Firstly, someone bringing in the concept of effectiveness and competence. Is not useful when most of the characters have a claim to status which is them speaking about 'warp plasma manifolds' and such things. Gobbledegook to us then. But they have to sell it. 

Another element I think is interesting is that each of these characters has an extremely, visceral violent aspect to their story. We saw the Chad Boseman character in that trailer. But Patrick Jane introduces us to Red John. Dr Cox introduces us to dark themes including the many patients dying from organ transplant and the guilt that followed, his character is noticeably darker than almost everyone else on that show, we do not see one other character resentfully drinking whiskey. Fringe is about a secretive group setting off chemical weapons to kill people horribly. The Hunger Games also has this kind of nastiness to it. 

This is something I don't see in the Projectors so much. Kevin Sorbo's Hercules was only ever facing humorous opponents. Aside from perhaps Teal'c, not one of the Projectors was facing this kind of visceral nastiness as an opponent. It makes me think that part of the Manifestors energy is a kind of "fighter" energy. I suppose if anger is your not- self theme. Then that would be likely! This is a noticeable difference to the Projector heroes journey of a sorts. Not one of these Manifestor characters has to fight for dignity. To articulate some sort of feeling that is important. They are struggling against an external foe.

Pulling this together then, what I think Manifestors might be, is "knowledge workers". Patrick Jane has a huge set of knowledge about how people operate. Dr Cox has an expertise. it might not be so obvious with other characters as in other characters have status that is not so earned (Black Panther and Olivia Dunham). But I think in energy terms. The Manifestor is focused on information. Which is why they are not so focused on people. 

Just one more thing then is how does the Manifestor focus on career and relationship? Since these are directly building things. We can go to real world people for this and I don't see a huge difference between this and the Generator way of interacting. Barbara O'Neill has four kids. Jordan Peterson has a family and thriving career. 

Come to think of it. I do not see a huge difference in Projectors either. Gad Saad. Hillary Crowder. Katie Hopkins. Nigel Farage. Rene Girard.

So it is a theory. The Human Design is largely subjective I think. A lot of what is experienced is not easily proven. It could be that Generators experience going for real world goals. Projectors have heroes journeys where they seek validation. And Manifestors are knowledge workers that have to apply that knowledge to the real messy world. That these are different energy pathways.

Or it could be that there is no difference. That each type can be described as building it's life in the same way.  

The types in context. Part 2.

In my preceeding post I started with a video from a Human Design creator. Who talked about how a Generators energy in life 'builds' the life around them. It started me thinking, if the same could be said of non sacral types and if not. How would we describe how the non sacral type operates? The normal model of how we interact. Get a job, find a partner, settle down. Is applicable to pretty much everyone in this world I think. Manifestors and Projectors still get jobs and have children. So how would we describe their position other than "building"?

To talk about this subject. To think it through. I have been using actors Human Design charts. The characters of specific actors I have found to be the same as the Human Design chart of the people playing them. I could write theories as to why this is. But I feel that would be redundant. The pattern is unbelievably clear in my view.

It is also clear many times before running the charts if you know what to look for.  

To contrast against the Generator then. This post will focus on Projectors. Using actor Projectors to gain insight. Then the next post will talk about Manifestors and probably wrap up the post. 

Going through my list of saved chart. There are LOADS, loads of Generator type. In my saved list under 'Andrew' there are five names. Just that one name. All Generators. I have to scroll quite far before I find many Projectors. And the Projectors I have found are themselves several times more than the smattering of names I have that are Manifestors.

Anyway, here is the list:

• Captain Jean Luc Picard played by Patrick Swayze in Star Trek The Next Generation.  
• Deanna Troi played by Marina Sirtis in Star Trek The Next Generation.
• Ensign Rowe played by Michelle Forbes in Star Trek The Next Generation. 
• Captain Benjamin Sisko played by Avery Brooks in Star Trek Deep Space Nine. 
• Lucifer played by Mark Pellegrino in Supernatural.
• Six played by Tricia Helfer in Battlestar Galactica.
• Moraine played by Rosamund Pike in The Wheel of Time. 
• Robert Picardo as 'Doctor' in Star Trek Voyager.
• Hercules played by Kevin Sorbo in Hercules the Legendary Journeys.
• Teal'c played by Christopher Judge in Stargate SG-1.

I would say that these characters all have more of a 'heroes journey' than the Generator characters in these TV shows. We do not see a great deal of 'heroes journey' from Miles O'Brien or Julian Bashir. We see heroic feats. But their story does not revolve around those things. Their story is very much the life they are trying to build. Julian and his efforts at romance. Miles as chief engineer and his various adventures with his war history and his family. The same with Neelix, or Seven of Nine or Captain Janeway. These characters do have journeys and sometimes they are classic hero journeys. Like Worfs. But it is rare. 

Benjamin Sisko, Hercules, Teal'c and Doctor are all on a very classical heroes journey. We do not really see them struggling with dating in the same way as the Generator types. Such as Tom Paris and B'elanna in Voyager.  We see them go on a heroes journey that sometimes, but not always, eventually includes a partner. Benjamin Sisko kind of 'fell' into this romance with Cassidy Yates.

A similar thing with Deanna Troi. Deanna is a perfect example of a Generator. It is what Generators do in their ideal world with a Projector. They put her on the bridge as a counsellor and telepath and she proves her usefulness by reading people in general. 

This classic Projector pattern of managing the Generators energy is very strong here. In Supernatural, the main two characters are very male Generators. Lucifers character is technically an angel. So he has to rely on free will (unlike demons). He has enormous power, fantastic power in the first five seasons. But since free will cannot be abridged, he works by manipulating them. By being on the side lines and manipulating their energy. 

Teal'c's character. Although classic hero. Is very often in a guidance position. The crew are often asking him questions to which he replies often humorously. His character precisely apes Hercules in that when he goes to live alone he gets in trouble for helping out with everyones problems. Defending people from gangs and such like that. Or you see the other SG team members going to see him when he is meditating for spiritual guidance, as happened a few times. 

Most of these characters at some point or other. Articulate their struggle in a way that sucks people in to a kind of heroes journey narrative. Ensign Rowe and Jean Luc Picard in Picard Season 3. Having to fight for recognition. The Doctor has to fight for recognition and rights as a hologram. Teal'c often has to confess to some deep dark secret in his past. Which is not precisely the same thing. But the whole journey of expressing "I feel this, this is important", is relevant. And it is not the same as the more physical victories the Generator characters have. Such as Julian Bashir when he settles down with Ezri Dax. 

What it seems to me here is that while the Generators have a defined real world goal. Captain Janeway wants to get home. Julian Bashir wants a girlfriend and a successful career. Data wants to become human. Even if it sneaks up on them. For the Projector characters. They kind of 'just are'. But then they have to undergo a fight that they usually didn't choose. Doctor does not struggle to specifically get a girlfriend or career. But then he is put upon to defend his right to self determination. 

In the Manifestor section I am going to make the point that in these shows they do often settle down, but the other half of them has to tolerate the eccentricities that come from their particular "mission". That the other partner (as being relevant to "building a family") seems often to do more of the work. (Like Jordan in Scrubs with Dr Cox, even though the thing was played as a joke of her being so difficult. If you actually take what happened. She is the one that worked on him). 

I am not even sure what the pattern is here with the Projectors. As regards to family life or career. Things you "build". Very few of these characters even have those things. The point here seems to be their ability to relate to others and the "heroes journey" they are on. 

The types in context. Part 1.

Wow, I have done a lot of stuff for me. I realise that it is not necessarily a great deal for others. But what with my reduced physical health it was very productive. Yesterday, from 1 am through to 7pm. I was on my feet doing stuff all day. Washing, Laundry, a lot of cooking, walking the dog. 

This is relevant because it is a potential benefit from the self improvement attempt I was mentioning in the last post. I.e. the energy increase might have been from NoFap, and from the gym in general. Even though I did not go to the gym on this day despite wanting to. I did some visualised gym instead. Apparently it's good for the muscles! I actually felt like the visualised gym tired me out a bit, as pathetic as that sounds! 

I wanted to mention this all around good video:

Youtube: Richard Beaumont: Generators Often Forget This ONE Thing.

https://youtu.be/RoG8Qi1thkw?si=yZjEjfIJvoJrlBjs 

I made a comment about a friend of mine on this video, a pure Generator. This friend is self employed and spends a lot of his time doing labouring kind of work. Heavy physical work. Not like... building site. Bricklaying or anything. But... almost that. Plenty of hammering things, climbing ladders etc.

After the amount of exercise I did yesterday I will need an entire day to recover. I find by checking myself. I have already done prayers. I will need more sleep or just lying down, meditation. Etc. But the food is prepared that allows me to do that. The guy I just mentioned would not need to rest the next day after that amount of work. Or far higher levels of physical work. In fact, he habitually does not have the next day off after those levels of physical work. He habitually does energetically demanding things after work. 

One of the things that I love about the Human Design is that it continually brings attention to a fact that is very basic. But also, unbelievably profound, and something that for some reason we tend to not reflexively consider. People are so different to us. It allows a great deal of stuff. Like, it allows me to consider others more favourably who lack the qualities I do have! In my chart is, (unsurprisingly), a great amount of cerebral energy, a great amount of will power that has throat access. 

This is an extremely positive thought direction I think. This counteracts some of the patterns of my childhood I have identified. It would seem to me to counteract a lot of messed up patterns in life. For instance, envy and jealousy. For people to feel and really value what they are, as read from the chart, would make them less envious of others! 

Homogenisation.

Also, as I think of my life. I realise that this is a value that I have absorbed as well. The homogenised viewpoint is a kind of "best of all types" approach. But the results of none of them. Let me explain. The mainstream view is a kind of Thatcherite perspective of 'just go out and make it happen' in relation to work say. But also, if you watch any movies and things. The characters are predictably Generators. So they are building their lives in a very standard kind of way. The romance, the this and that of work. The conflict and resolution. Building is happening (romance, music focused). Or has happened in the past but is now partially destroyed (action hero movies). So the mainstream also wants you to be a 'builder'.

I have noticed previously that Manifestor actors are extraordinarily rare. They are less shown in TV shows than in the rest of the population per capita. In fact, I can name one in a TV show at the moment of this writing. I have done the charts of most of the actors in shows like Star Trek Deep Space Nine and Star Trek Voyager. All Generators, with a few Projectors (such as Benjamin Sisko from DS9). They act and feel like generators as well. People can only act like a character that is their same type because... what else is there? There is nothing else to draw from but their own energy. But Star Trek gets a lot of its appeal from the tribal, animalistic way the senior staff are "bonded" together. You can see it in those shows. You can see how all the Voyager crew how Generator and animalistic like they all are. Odo, chief O'Brien from DS9, etc. 

I will go into what we can learn from the very few Manifestors on TV. But why is this? It could be one of two things I suppose. Either Manifestors in general cannot tolerate the groupthink of liberal Hollywood, and so the actors are ostracised. Or, and I prefer this interpretation. The scripts intuitively do not accommodate the kind of characters a Manifestor naturally takes to. 

So the exceptions. John McGinley from Scrubs. This character is known to be a loner, hostile, and kind of aggressive. I was talking to a really unpleasant and passive aggressive person on Stefan Molyneuxs twitter recently, and I finally applied one of that characters dressing down insult sessions in a good context:

"Wow, that's intelligent. You have the brain power to light up a city. Not a real city mind you. But definitely an ant city whose government has recently passed a set of stringent energy conservation laws".

I wonder if that is one of those things I find funny that no one else really does. I cracked up re- writing that. It is so unneccessarily petty!

Other examples are Johnny Depp. For instance, in Pirates of the Caribbean. Another would be Chad Boswick of Black Panther. 

This article is part one I realise because. I need to go to bed.  I also realise that there is more I need to say on this since I need to bring in the Projector. So it will be longer than I expected. The ultimate point I am trying to get to is plotting out the position of the Projector and the Manifestor if the Generators are the builders as said in this video.

Continued self improvement.

At the moment. I have experienced what might be one of the future things that "works" in relation to self improvement. 

It's embarrassing to talk about. But it should be mentioned if it is working I believe. Since I have been going to the gym I have not been masturbating. Part of this was likely I had two weeks where my medication was off and was kind of ill. But also, just going to the gym exhausted me and stopped me thinking about the entire area. 

I do not use porn. As the UK government has put in laws that mean you have to give them your ID and such to watch porn (also smut stories on Reddit). I did not see any particular problem with it when I did watch it. But since coming off it there was an improvement in my thoughts. One that showed up after about 6 months and not a day before. 

One of the insights that I got from doing the gym a lot and not masturbating was that the best way to not do it is to... Not do it. Not even think about it. Not even edge (A process of thinking of sex and engaging a little bit physically but without the intention of going the entire way). Before, borrowing from a line in the Law of One, something like "we have found it inappropriate in the extreme to encourage the cessation of these thoughts". I always thought it was unhealthy to completely not think of the area, as it represents a kind of repression. The Law of One talked a lot about how repression is a tool of the negative polarity. They specifically mentioned repressing the sex drive.

But, to get success in this area. To successfully do NoFap. I realise that just not thinking about it. Not edging or engaging at all. Is, in fact, the answer! 

There are changes already. It has been about 20 days. To fully go into the changes I don't think would be suitable for this blog, due to length and the subtlety of some of them. But one of them that I have noticed, is that my dreams have people in them more. They have within them more of the kinds of conflicts I experience in life. My dreams normally are kind of unattached. I will go to this place, then float to that place, drive a car. People are only involved tangentially. Like, going into a class room with a bunch of people. Going to a sink and the teacher comes over briefly, maybe asks me if I am using the basin and goes away again. Not real interactions. But today, and before when I have done NoFap. I had a dream that included other people and a very specific, engaged interaction that I would have with others. The idea that I would engage in this and the dreams would provide some sort of answer would be amazing. I can feel the problem thinking of it, (I can remember the feeling of those types of interactions) and in feeling terms, I don't have a solution (so when I have experienced x problem as a feeling, I have not had an accompanying feeling that lead to an action that solved the problem).

This could also provide a general feeling of socialising from my dreams that might make me seem more comfortable socialising in my daily life.  

Nothing else to say massively. My self and viewpoints are changing with this changed attitude to my health. Grounding is a thing I get from NoFap. But also a thing I have strongly gotten from exercise. Going to the gym and doing weights. Grounding is very important. But my viewpoints have changed a bit with all this exercise. Things I thought were problems. Or things that I started to make complex mental models of, planning to write a blog on them. Have revealed themselves to either be irrelevant, and/ or uninteresting, while I am constructing the blog in my mind. So I am writing less blogs.

Commitment to abstract principles.

One of the things I see in life is that it is fairly rare for a person to have a commitment to abstract principles. This could be religion/ philosophy, something that is partially outside of them, a set of rules they might have to re read every so often to make sure they are properly applying it. I suppose you could say peoples abstract principles are those values they already hold. But it's not quite what I mean. If someone already has some principles they hold. The likely benefit to having entirely internal values is that a good deal of the time (but not everyone). The person will substitute just what they emotionally feel like doing in the moment.  

I have had this conversation in the past... "What values are you committed to that supersede your own emotional preferences?" If those emotional preferences are things I deem to not be compatible with me seeing that person. I.e. if the person is condescending in some manner. I want to be able to say to them 'this behaviour is not compatible with this value'. 

In truth, I have not held strongly to this condition. But I have held to it somewhat I suppose. I have not insisted on an intellectual outlying of a persons value system. But I have used this language to explain that certain behaviour is not OK and when that behaviour has changed, and when the person wants to change. I have seen the person again. 

The gym is fantastic. It has now started to become the most important thing in my self improvement. Above meditation or prayer. Sometimes I really need both of those things. Prayer for when things seem to strangely be going off the rails. But the gym is providing such obvious and powerful health improvements. Such unbelievable senses of good feeling. That it has become the priority. I also go on these bodybuilder guys youtube. It shows a lot about human nature that I did not previously realise. 

One thing that I have seen recently is a video from two guys who said that people treat you very differently once you have gained the muscle. If they have gained like 30 pounds muscle from a healthy bodyweight. All of a sudden people are asking loads and loads of advice from them and just assuming a huge amount of competence. Giving them work/ leadership opportunities and such. 

Stefan Molyneux talked about a concept like this. He said that if people want to know if what you have to offer is legit. They will tend to look at the person to see if their own advice is working for them. You wouldn't go to a poor financial advisor or an unfit personal trainer. 

In a sense. I am showcasing the spiritual things I have talked about here. The Law of One, the Human Design Chart. However, I have a disability. I have a primary health condition and a few secondary issues stemming from that. This definitely prevents movement forward in the gym and most specifically, I don't have a huge flexibility over my diet. So for me, even though I am using some of the best tools there are to use, in my opinion. It probably isn't actually going to show up in my life a great deal. 

But I suppose. They do make me more loving and not resentful about a lot of life circumstances. It is very within the Law of One way of being it seems to me to accept a simple life. 

People, in general, have a lot of problems. All these sociopaths, drug addicts and leftists running about. All this child abuse. I am not saying my health condition is worse than those other issues. I was just wondering about the promotion of those spiritual types of things.

I have not kept up with reading philosophy as much as I would have liked to. But the notes I have made on what I already have read have been giving me value.

Recently I have been fretting a bit about how the information from David Wilcock has messed up my mind a bit. How his model, even little things that he used to say that I would be committed to. Just absolutely poisoned my world view. An example is thinking about TV shows. I used to believe that there were loads of deep negative agendas in TV shows. Or that there was disclosure in TV shows and it really perverted my understanding of the story. Those kinds of thoughts took up a lot of 'mental real estate'. However, on having those thoughts and experiencing anger about them. I am reminded of this passage by Nietzsche. In the 11th section of Beyond Good and Evil:

One can do no greater wrong to this whole high- spirited and enthusiastic movement, which was really youthfulness, however boldly it disguised itself in hoary and senile concepts, than to take it seriously, and an even worse injustice, to treat it with moral indignation; it is enough to say that one grew older - and the dream disappeared.

This is just a casual comment by Nietzsche. It is not like... a coherent expression of a fundamental part of his philosophy like the will to power or anything (which he never actually wrote!) But even this casual comment is very useful and meaningful to me, and it shows I'm on the right track I think!

The Law of One and music. 

The only other issue I have been thinking through is these insights from the Law of One on 'transcient information'. I want to get back to music. I do play music, but I cannot seem to write music, specifically songs, anymore. I want to get back to the feel I had. The ease with which I wrote music. Before my 2014 schizophrenic break where... well, I got into a lot of political concerns to explain what was happening in the world that I had not previously perceived. It was a 'red pill' moment for me.

This set me up with a different feeling and belief system in the world. The song I made about the 2014 schizophrenic break. Was dark and mysterious and pulsed with real feeling. But, in that case, before 2014. I still had the old model of the world. The kind of 'blue pilled' or 'centre left wing' model. 

In this model. I basically didn't think of politics. Besides how it effected me. Which was in making my life difficult as a jobseeker. But something about this model allowed me to look out into the world and make music about the things I experienced there. 

It could be other things. Age in general. Social experiences. Hair (if the Law of One says hair is an antenna and I have lost most of mine!) 

But I thought it would be worth exploring. I have kind of had the 'intuition' to explore. Is that the first viewpoint was more in line with the Law of One. With seeing things in a Law of One way because I did, in fact, have very little understanding of politics.

My perspective now has a deep understanding - relative to that understanding. Of the subject. And of all the generally negative tendencies of a lot of peoples perspective on all these things. 

It also involves me in almost daily discussion on this. Including nasty tweets sometimes. Like, in this Lindsay Clancy situation. Someone asked on twitter: "What would be the difference if she had killed someone else kids instead of her own?" and I quote tweeted with "The brand of woodchipper". I just saw a tweet that annoyed me; which was a cheap feminist jab that seemed to miss the relevant emotions in an issue and I wanted to, but didn't, quote tweet it with something like "Foids don't understand grief". 

I am wondering if part of the Law of One in considering everyone part of the Creator. Which might include boycotting these kinds of comments and this kind of material a lot. Is that it would get me to experience the world more in line with being the kind of "channel" I want to be in music. 

It could also be other things that I just need to practice a whole lot. But I do practice anyway. So I do not think it is that. Or that I need to listen to more of the kind of music that I want to create.

Just thinking it through. Anyway, those are my thoughts for today.  

Sometimes you need reminding.

Just how psychotic the left is. 

Conspiracy. 

I am not sure what is going on with the Lindsay Clancy case in... I heard a bit of conspiracy that seemed realistic. My understanding is that she never plead guilty. It is often said 'she admitted to it'. But in fact it was only the husbands word that she told him that. 

After she allegedly killed the children. She cut her wrist across (not down the vein) and then jumped out the window head first and shattered her spine. I believed this supported the conspiracy narrative because, as was being said on Tik Tok. Cutting across the wrist is not effective. So although she was clearly very serious about killing herself but with medical knowledge did not cut her wrists properly? Is the case made.

I have learned this is an uninformed myth though. Although it was said when I was younger that TV shows show cutting across the wrists because they don't want to show the real technique for suicide which is cutting down the vein. Actually, it is the artery which is on the outside of the wrist that is the thing that kills. So this seemed to be inconsistent to me. Like someone said "maybe someone else did it". But it is in fact not. Cutting across the wrist like she did is in fact how someone would kill themselves. This is consistent. 

The only other thing from Owen Benjamin. Was that her husband apparently then married someone connected to child trafficking and generally "connected".

The state assumed guilt in this case. As they often do. She did not plead guilty. The state is not bringing a trial to prove that she actually killed anyone. And they did not take any evidence to prove that she did. Like, DNA and such. The trial is on whether she was experiencing psychosis when she did the crime. As I said, it is assumed she did.  

Maybe that is legitimate I don't know. Many times when the state has done this it has been proven to be wrong. Not always in murders. From my perspective then. The state has simply not proven guilt. If you don't prove guilt, you don't get a conviction. I am not assuming guilt because they said so (surely they get enough money to do their jobs! The state steals like 80% of all wealth.). Even if, circumstantially, it makes a great deal of sense. On the 3% chance someone else did it. She should go free.  

Morons. 

Anyway, this is not the case that is being shown out in the world. In the actual trial. Most of the jurors seemed to me that they didn't have two brain cells to rub together. They can't even contend with the facts of the case itself. Let alone consider the behaviour of the State before this trial. It would be a very uncomfortable thing I think me being in that room reading with incredible preciseness everything I could on the case. Every bit of evidence. Memorising it, arguing those facts, and getting angry at passive aggressive responses in defence. 

The whole situation has become an absolute circus though. The title of this blog post. 'Sometimes you need reminding' and 'The psychopathy of the left'. Is that, the case went to mistrial. There were eleven jurors who wanted her to be declared mentally unfit. And one hold out juror. 

This was all happening in the liberal mainstream media. Whom have a very specific belief system that they religiously adhere to. Women are perfect and in most cases unreproachable. No matter how bad their behaviour. No consequence should ever come to them. As in this specific case. The jurors, believed Lindsay killed her kids. by 7 minute strangulation of each kid. But they wanted her released anyway.  

The defence lawyer threatened this one juror. Saying that he would be scrutinised and investigated after the case. Then, several jurors were interviewed by the MSM. The first juror said something like "He couldn't get over the fact she had killed her three children"... Uh. Not sure what to say to that. The next one, was a guy, who said that he didn't understand why the hold out juror had tied the exercise band around the water bottle to show the process of strangling the child (i.e. maybe arguing Lindsays commitment to the murder? Or the horror of it?) But then he admitted the guy did actually give his reason. He was obviously trying to imply the guy was being unreasonable but didn't have anything. 

The third juror though, when asked about the make up of ages and ethnicities of the jury. Admitted something that seemed to absolutely destroy the liberals platform... The lone juror was black! He was a minority. Another one of those that are above reproach in the mainstreams fanaticism. 

So... what are you going to do now?

The right was very jubilant about this. Very happy. But the left, and the mainstream media didn't miss a beat. They just started targeting the black holdout juror. (After the case had already been declared a mistrial).

The whole thing is clearly criminal. The media should not have the power to intimidate a juror. The whole point of a jury is to not be intimidated. But what was so weird. And so not understandable to regular people with values. Is that the MSM just turned on the black guy. Started tracking his employer down and printing that he was a criminal of some description.

And no matter how many times I theorise about these people. It still surprises me that they have just lied... Again! They have never cared about black people. The white liberal jurors and the MSM are now scapegoating him as the dumb black guy. 

It is just a weird thing for many people to try and process. It does not matter how many times you experience people with no values. It never quite seems to make any sense. 

It reminds me of a note I have made. Stefan Molyneux FDR Podcast 5839: "To a person who has railed against conscience. All relationships are expendable." What he was talking about here. Is that if you know someone who has done evil stuff. If you were to challenge them on it. A lot of them would not handle the situation. They would get angry. Make excuses and throw the person bringing up the issue out of the room.

Because once the conscience has been fought against and evil doing has happened. This becomes the thing the person serves. So rather like what the mainstream media have done perhaps. They are serving something else. The juror somehow stepped on a principle or important piece in the global chess match and they are serving that principle and so the juror goes out the window. Even if the juror and protecting black people is a value they previously claimed. 

It is all so weird. Anyway, that's what I had to say for the moment.  

The pure depth and scale of the deception. Emotional insight.

This will be a post that goes lightly into conspiratorial areas at the end. 

Tomorrow, the effect of my medication increase is going to kick in so I will be, in a good place. I have resisted this raise for 2 weeks because it comes with potential limitations. So I have had the negative side effects. But, tomorrow I will be more well. So that will be good. 

I have had thoughts on the best way forward for psychological improvement. Working off various dream interpretations, youtube videos, and general insights. But I am not quite well and articulate enough to put it together today. 

Emotional insight. 

As a basic thought. In relation to session 5.2. I have worked through jealousy and what I figure to be its antithesis. And I have worked through humiliation and what I consider to be its antithesis and times in my past when I experienced that. This was... quite something. Bringing up emotions from my past by deciding to do so creates quite the emotional shift. It was not something I realised I had access to. 

Then, looking for further opposing beliefs like that. I remembered a time, as pointed out to me by a close friend close to this time, when I got very into martial arts and became quite aggressive. Then I went to Reiki and started doing a lot more music. So my personality shifted quite a lot. These are potentially to me two direct opposites that exist within me that can bring light to this balancing practice. 

But what I then started realising was that all these balancing emotions were following the same pattern. The martial arts started when I got bullied in school. The Reiki and music was the opposite of that. A belief, not grounded in reality, of a sacred destiny. These are the same two emotions underlying the humiliation, and its antithesis. This obviously fits into the antithesis of jealousy. The 'revenge of living a good life'. This would fit into the sacred destiny part. Then the other, jealousy of others, often socially. Links to the humiliation issue. 

I do not experience, consciously at least. Great sadness or great happiness. I do experience a kind of hedonism which is kind of happiness. But it is not happiness as others experience it I don't think. I think this is a genetic limitation, likely, from my father (who could have been a sociopath but was likely just a really mixed up guy). Or maybe my medical condition has dulled me a little. Or perhaps it is from lack of self awareness, or lack of achievement in my life that would bring that happiness? Lack of fun with women? (Nietzsche once commented that women make the highs higher and the lows more frequent!) Or for another reason entirely. It is not a set of emotions I think at the moment will likely bear fruit to explore. 

But the fact that every emotion is organising into these two separate sections brings me back to what I had said previously about the human design. That parts of my life have been divided into understanding of their themes through the human design and specifically the nodes are something I often gain insight into. These emotions seem neatly divided in the unconscious and conscious south nodes. The humiliation in the unconscious south node. And the 'sacred destiny', in the conscious south node. The conscious south node is gate 46.6. Which is the channel of failing where others succeed/ succeeding where others fail. So it is a hexagram involved in that kind of mystical destiny like thing. 

This has made me suspect, not know for sure, but suspect. That the investigation into the emotions in relation to this healing kind of direction is not going to be fruitful for me. Because my instincts, and intuition, are essentially running in a different direction. Towards human design kinds of insights. 

Anyway, this is all just a bit of meandering thought. I consider my goal to be worth all these thoughts and that is to find functional thoughts/ philosophies/ healing modalities/ spiritual concepts to bring meaning and healing to life. 

One more thing though. 

I am watching Star Trek Voyager that I like a great deal. I think it is the best Star Trek. I used to think that was Deep Space Nine but on watching them as an adult I realise Voyager is actually more adult and profound. Less ridiculous and spectacular. I am currently watching, would you believe it, an episode where one of the Star Trek officers is abducted by aliens and put through really intense brainwashing. Which, he does yeild to. And finds he is unable to undo emotionally at the end of the episode when he is safe again. 

It is what I kind of wanted to talk about. Something adjacent. At some point in 2020. I looked heavily into Elite Gender Inversions. The idea that a lot of these actors are transgender. Like, all of them. 

I watched about 200 videos on this because I just needed to get it through my head. I can see this now, clear as day. And I was reminded of this while watching this series. The constant attempts to sexualise Jeri Ryan with her thin body and huge breasts. But whose face is unmistakeably masculine:

Youtube: New Age Slave: Jeri Ryan Transvestigation. April 16th 2025:

https://youtu.be/KBe97SF5WDI?si=c4Hcgih6wCxy3EIO 

There are two points that I want to make from this. Firstly, that the breadth of the deception we are under is huge. Sometimes the deceptions go into layers. So you uncover one layer and you get to another and another, and you are still not at the actual truth. 

Like with the Lindsay Clancy case. The first layer is that you hear that women have an important issue of postpartum depression that men are not taking seriously in a court case. OK, that's a lie. The death of three children were involved. The next level is problems with the actual case and how the state has handled it. Inconsistencies. Dodgy things with the husband. I would say this is just as much of a deception. That there is always a specific script written for the 'low level conspiracy theorists'. The next level down is that they are both clearly transgender so the entire thing might be staged. I would imagine there are further layers.

EGI's are not just actors. They are singers. Some of those I was devoted to. They are politicians. Like Trump, as an example (David Icke is a prominent one too, Alex Jones might have been replaced.). Even after I investigated this all in some depth. I realised I could not completely separate myself from all this because... It is everywhere. It is ubiquitous in culture. Which is why I have Voyager on now despite suspecting it is a 100% transgender show. You would have to just sit in a room alone without any entertainment to avoid it all. A level of stress impossible to tolerate.

All put together. The take away for me is that the level of deception is astounding. A lot of things that seem to be happening. That we are given all the hints that a certain thing is happening that is against the liberal agenda. Is all of this same kind of control in my view. It was not a coincidence that the writers of The Boys made it all an anti Trump fest. They were ordered to do so. They are not liberal writers losing discipline. They are metaphorical robots to whatever this agenda is. 

For this reason. Firstly, it can all be ignored. This or that politician said that might be a little relevant to any policies that effect your actual life. But what we are being shown is a show. I imagine huge country wide movements like Promethean Updates talking about Trump fighting the deep state might be accurate. But a lot is just a show and deception for some agenda. (The good guys have agendas sometimes too!)

I do not believe in flat earth. But if the world were flat. Our leaders would not tell us. I consider a lot of reality we are told might turn out to be a deception. The ruling elite might be Reptilians - or Reptilians itself might have been a deception - and there might be a different kind of alien menace. But even when truthseekers and good guys do something, that might be a deception too. For instance, I am not particularly trusting of the Epstein saga considering these were all transgenders. You would think that might have been mentioned! So I consider it might be a convenient smokescreen to take some (human?) criminals out of society, without revealing things that the population cannot yet face. 

This has a lot of obvious meaning for the future. It is possible that after this real life stuff is revealed. A lot of peoples behaviour will change radically.  

What have we missed? 

I said there were two points. And my second point is simpler... What is it that has been stolen from us in these things?

Incalculable surely. It really is tied up with all of the deception on our planet. But watching Voyager I wonder what heights a show with non transgender characters would have? A group of sane people intuitively arriving at a powerful message.

A genuine woman playing a female character, if suitably incentivised. Might tell us more about female nature. Might be able to play with those complexities from her intuition. A similar thing with men and the 'heroes journey'. The shows might be able to explain nitty, real life philosophical issues and heroic feats. To inspire and to explain. 

Anyway, that's all I have for today.  

It is worth it; and the history of Boomers.

Try to keep this one short. But as it flows it might grow longer. 

Thinking it through. 

I have talked about the Law of One session 5.2 previously, and my attempts to follow it, to contemplate and consider it. In relation to a kind of healing journey. I suppose if I am properly thinking through this area I am on a healing journey. I do desire to heal myself physically and I have for a long time. 

Not something I planned to say. But I casually have fantasies of being an amazing healer like that. Or not me specifically, as strange as it sounds... "someone" being a healer like we see in the 4400 (the first series, not the remake) in the character of Shawn Farrell. Whos character was a healer that could heal anything. 

It was a pretty amazing concept. In the same way that part of what I like about sci fi. Is, even in fiction, atheists and skeptics being confronted with something supernatural they can no longer deny. 'The Expanse' did this amazingly. So many power hungry bureaucrats with zero redeeming features being confronted by a supernatural fungus. That was doing things that were very powerful and completely unpredictable that the humans couldn't understand. 

In the same way I suppose, it would be good if Christians were confronted with something they could not deny. The Christian tendency towards claiming unearned authority. Claiming the authority of God while being unable to prove connection to God (as Jesus did when he healed!) Is continually annoying. This tweet covers it well. 

Claiming moral authority while supporting lockdown, leftism, and all manner of unethical things. 

The church is like it is though, because of Boomers. That has also been discussed on X recently. For example here and here.

This is how I see it

In World War 2 a massive amount of the powerful, intelligent, alpha males were killed off in war. The Church also lost a lot of moral authority in the war for two reasons. One, the church supported the war. Which at first people perhaps went along with, but once it started they might have been a bit like 'bruh'. Culturally, people came face to face with the fact that prayer does not solve these things. Even if they prayed, they would be subject to food rationing and bombing and such, the deaths of their friends and family. The whole traumatic event. 

Also, the baby Boomers were born out of their parents last ditch attempt at some joy in the world. Probably many of them thinking they weren't going to make it and this was before contraception. I imagine the Boomers born of that moment of desperate need for joy and life, screw the consequences, seemed to carry forward that same energy. 

And so the war ended and the world was remade anew. Governments were putting themselves back on their feet. The beginnings of a welfare state, and in the UK, public health system were created, to look after returning soldiers. But the world lived under amazing prosperity due to two things. One: massively increased innovation. Companies that had been slowly rolling out innovation for maximum profit were overruled by the security apparatus of their countries so there was new technology. Two: Without any red tape and political agendas in the new shell shocked regime. A free market of sorts could form, and thus, began a period of unbelievable prosperity.

So hence, the environment the Boomers were born into: A) Propaganda was at its peak. Nowadays you have edgy zoomers saying things like "if the Nazi's had won, there would be no Muslim rape gangs". At the time, there was no internet. The mainstream media fully controlled the narrative. And the Wests particular moral authority and agenda were pushed. B) As I mentioned, unbelievable prosperity. Back then you could just walk out of a job and walk into another one. This point has been discussed at length in modern discourse about the Boomers and obviously, money like that, and a functioning culture, also reflected into making relationships easier. C) Christianity, tradition and cultural roots, had been utterly destroyed. Morally defeated. 

There are more complex and global aspects of this such as the continued result of the coming of the gold standard and inflation. But that would make this blog post even longer.  

It would take a very astute mind, with probably a Mensa level IQ. To see the approaching cultural rot in those apparently positive things. Most of these things are like deals with the devil. You make your deal, you get your wealth and fun upfront. But the price slowly creeps in as all that you brought for it turns to ash. The culture that is falling apart. The licentiousness. The inflation and the broken economy. They all stemmed from this environment and the people that came from the environment.

But lets continue the story. The Boomers then, their giddy teenage eyes looking on the world. Just as the pill came out. Engaged on a massive spree of free love. Their culture they were contributing to the world gave pretty much no virtue. This was not the generation that writes Charles Dickens. They were the culture that enjoyed the richness of their ancestors that Charles Dickens belonged to. But they were not the culture that created that. They were the culture that enjoyed disco. 

Things were good. Although tradition and its attendant benefits were still strong. They were on the way out. They had the benefits, like I said, of a stable society. But in their culture they were able to push against tradition for their lives and identity. They did not want any limits on their lusts and hedonism. They did not want to seriously consider the bible and Christianity. Or work on philosophy mostly. They just kind of... were.

But then they grew older. "Pride comes before the fall". Humans follow a fairly predictable pattern. They grow and they learn until about 20. They have their first experiences of rebellion and personal power between about 15-25. But after that, after 25 and into their thirties and later. People need some sort of moral authority of their own. Some sort of explanation of why the world is the way it is that they can bring to the younger generations that are asking questions like "how do I live in this world?"

This is where the Boomers experienced discomfort. A discomfort most of them have not acknowledged by standing steady to the post war neoliberal order and the pretence that nothing has changed. Once a person gets into their 40's or so. They need to have spent a certain amount of time thinking and considering, perhaps reading the greats. To have anything of value to contribute. 

In the absence of that. In the absence of the kind of mindset that would write C.S.Lewis' "The Screwtape Letter". These people had the need for moral authority. The need for something to tell the younger individuals. Without the tendency, from their youth, to have thought through and worked through those beliefs. To see through trial and error what works and to pursue virtue. 

So from that, the Boomers, like I have said, have the desire for moral authority. But nothing to say. So what do they do? They rely on the easiest and simplest interpretations of everything. The most childish interpretation. And as a collective, and with the backing of their collective wealth. They dig their heels in and dogmatically insist that their way is the right way. 

This is where all the problems are. A theologically curious generation would have a better idea of Christian teachings as explained by spiritual teachers like Aaron Abke. There would be more challenging of ideas such as the salvation by faith narrative. But the boomers did not do that. So they do not say that. The way the church today is formed. You would think it had no history. It is recognised that the Apostle Paul and Jesus disciples were in disagreement with each other. But this knowledge, even though it is mainstream. Is just wiped from modern Christianity. 

The same thing with the "forgiveness without contrition" argument. It is a lazy, demonic and simplistic argument. But because it is easy. Because it takes the easy way out, rather than challenging evildoers, it scapegoats and places moral responsibility on the victim. Boomers like this. So this is what the church becomes. 

It is the same with a lot of things. Their passive, spiritual egalitarianism. Talking about how spiritual and loving they are by allowing migrants into the country to take their childrens jobs and rape them. They never went beyond left wing politics because left wing politics is that of a child. It is simplistic, easy answers to complex problems. Answers that initiate violence on the virtuous and reward the non virtuous. 

This is why DEI has been allowed to flourish as well. Even though, originally pushed by feminists. Boomers, who were mentored in the world they lived in. Do not want to mentor the new generation of men they are in competition with. They would prefer to mentor a pretty young woman, to stare at her tits, and to probably sleep with them sometimes as well. 

This from a gen z woman:

They feel entitled to young women, they flash cash, cars, and watches and expect young women to throw themselves at them (some do). I cannot tell you how regularly boomer men are aggressive and sexual with me. I do not get upset when I am approached by men UNLESS it is a boomer. They are smug and feel entitled. And they have contempt for every man my age and it comes across in the their demeaning approach. Metoo movement cause real harm to young men but boomers remained untouched. I don’t really have any respect for the women that feed into this either.

The environment.

This is the environment that needs to be destroyed. The Christianity lead by these completely self centered, stupid, and childish, people. I cannot tell you how many places I have been socially ostracised from. I was socially ostracised from several workplaces. The first office I worked in they had weekly get togethers and invited everyone except me. It was an office of thirty year old women. This went on for two years and if I spoke to anyone there, like, if a new staff member was sat next to me. Soon afterwards, she would often refuse to speak to me. Not even to say hello. I remember each one. 

It is one of those things that I don't have power over. I do not have power over the vast amount of people that have strategically socially ostracised me. In working with this healing modality I realise something else. If we take enough power over our inner world, we cannot hold onto grudges. The reason is, is that a grudge is connected to that inner world. What goes on outside us reflects inside us. If we feel angry, we are mostly angry at someone out there somewhere in the world. If we were to significantly shift that anger. Our relationship to that thing in the world has to change. 

I mentioned before how I had handled jealousy and its opposite. I have had an insight into another emotion that has opened up a whole new level of insight. I notice when I start with an emotion and find its opposite. It's opposite is often 'subconscious' in some manner. And each time the subconscious emotion kind of feels the same. Which is interesting in and of itself. It might mean I can more easily find the subconscious emotion by focusing on that 'feel'. 

Anyway, like I started the blog out with. It feels... pretty fantastic to do this. Having a practical way of shifting emotions is just... amazing. To start off with an emotion that is normally pretty unmoveable and to find another emotion. Bring it to the first and have there be a shift, a change. That you don't normally experience.

Jesus said for us to set up our treasure where thieves do not break in and steal. 

I do not know where I am going with this and I have been long enough in the new age and spiritual areas to not give in to sensationalism. At least as much as I used to. But, as a fantasy to consider, if me or someone else were to do this to the effect of being able to heal oneself and/ or others. The fantasy that would follow from that is having authority to then challenge the churches authority. To challenge mainstream Christianities falsely claimed authority as a whole. 

To completely break the arrogant Boomers strangle hold on religion. To outwardly state the person would not deal with Christianity because it has no legitimacy and to mention specifically their rejection of astrology on no rational grounds.

Wow would that be great.

But it is just a fantasy.  

Consequences coming?

Things have been a bit strange for me lately. 

I cannot describe the force of bad luck that has met me recently. Dates changed. Not able to pick up a prescription. Shop workers annoyed at me for no reason. The dog getting ill etc. 

This might be due to resistance to changing my medication. Perhaps anxiety is causing bad feedback.  

For that reason, I am going to branch out a bit in this blog into the political area. I have thoughts that I am working on in relation to theological or philosophical teachings. But not to sit with or articulate them. 

Consequences 

Two things have come in the news recently and I think there is possibly a similarity in these:

A) The Lindsay Clancy trial and the issue of womens position and feminism. 

B) A major UK incident happened yesterday where there were protests against arriving immigrants in Dover. 

The similarity is that both headlines potentially lead to the escalation of these issues such that there is actually some real world consequence.

Since Lindsay Clancy. A lot of women that just repeat dysfunctional and tyrannical woke dogma are having men break up, or even divorce in relationships. (This is separate from the details of the case, purely how it is being reflected into the populace at large).

Gloria Steinem. An initiator of feminism and an elite gender inversion (a biological man), has died a week or so ago. Which could be symbolic.

There are also issues like this finally coming up:

 

Hardly "equality" is it?

 

 

With the Dover issue. Rupert Lowe did a post recently:

 

Second half: 

 

The idea that the bureaucrats that are usually so above any sort of consequences would personally be liable is very interesting.

Personal change. 

For me personally. Perhaps I am getting older or perhaps this is due to the gym recently. I feel way more connected to the 'real world'. And that the habit of thinking with less anxiety than I previously had is slowly changing me. 

A lot of people got upset at this tweet from Trump:

It's all kind of tiring and it feels like I need to adapt to a world, emotionally; where people DO NOT get consequences for their actions, in general. Feels like it is the only way to stay sane and the incredibly intense fantasies that I had about consequences coming in my youth were all a waste of energy. 

It's still worth noticing and observing though. I have often thought previously that political events might be reflected in the astrological transits. What happens to individuals as shown by transits happens to larger groups as shown by transits. If Mars is transiting something. That transit shows up in a persons life as say, an ambitious person showing up. In politics, that might be an entire political party or country being ambitious. 

So perhaps this tendency towards consequence is starting to reflect in our real life too? 

 

Keeping up with Law of One exercises.

I have had a couple of successes. I am continuing to think over the Session 5.2 of the Law of One healing guidance.

A) I mentioned jealousy before. In thinking over jealousy. I was trying to find its opposite. The opposite is that you want others to be jealous of you. Or that you enjoy the ways others are jealous of you. Well I get that emotion strongly. I felt the desire that others be jealous of me and I recognised the emotion and immediately flipped it in becoming jealous of others. I consciously tried to think of the good things of others I might be jealous of.

And... it worked. I brought the balance of those two things together! Immediately both feelings were gone. The desire that others be jealous of me is something I have experienced a lot. 

B) Following on from that. It is hard to keep my mind on this kind of thing. When I go back to the Law of One now I will be beyond this specific passage. I don't habitually think that emotionally. Or, perhaps I do, and like everyone it is unconscious. But the next thing I could think of was 'humiliation'. I feel humiliated sometimes in that my life is kind of... very domestic/ basic/ boring. I could not think of an opposite to this... The desire to humiliate others? Perhaps humility? Having a different perspective on the same situation is relevant.

I was listening to Richard Grannon, and he talks about journalling and then you find the emotional base of that. Using an emotion wheel. To make the emotion more complex. So in the example of worthless, or inferior. (Not that far away from humiliation, oh wait, humiliated is here in the anger section. I didn't see it before). These emotions of worthless and inferior might go down to weak and insecure, and then down to fearful. 

C) Outside of that though. Constantly going to the gym is an amount of emotional change that is pretty powerful. I deliberately thought of someone that has been a big upset in my life on the way home. Someone that condescends to me. I genuinely couldn't bring myself to care. It was good! 

Anyway, that's all I have to say for the moment. 

Negative Greeting. Reworking mental models.

I will probably be laying out a bit of my case for my "greeted" thoughts. So just an fyi ahead of time. Meaning some of what I say here I might later explain why it is terrible reasoning. 

In the Law of One. The contact, when asked why certain things were happening, almost always to do with Carla's ("the instruments") health. They would say things like the negative entity tempted this person, or are energising this particular problem etc.

I think this is an interesting aside as to how they approach these issues and an important one. The Law of One contact could have said that there are negative forces engaging with the situation but to address this and think on it directly is generally toxic and not to do it. 

But they didn't. They discussed negative greeting and how to handle it in some depth. 

A recent experience.

For a little while, I have made an argument here of what I think the healing journey is, for specifically men really. That the difficulties men experience from not naturally having status. Means they experience difficult things. Some of these things are calculated for instance. If you are in an entire group of people that do not like you, but you need to relate to. Say work colleagues. Then your mind calculates that actually seeing their aggression is not good for you, because you want to continue surviving. If the aggression is noticed it becomes an immediate conflict. 

The experiences they have if they are not healthy may get stored in their muscles as hormonal combinations. Then, a bit later, when a guy does physical exercise in particular. This stuff gets released (as the muscles break down in gym work as an example), and then it is cleaned out of the system. Through the exercise but also through the knowledge that the person is increasing in strength and testosterone. So if the situation were to recur, they would be able to fight the tribe of people they were having the subtle conflict. 

In this way, when a person goes to the gym. They may get incredibly powerful and deep insights. But, it also adds in a kind of paradigm that might not be correct as I will go into. It adds in the paradigm that our subconscious and body are holding a lot of "stuff" back that needs to be cleaned out. And that perhaps if we do that we will eventually reach some kind of nirvana of clarity as all those kinds of problems in our subconscious are cleaned out.

I went to the gym late last night. Normally I do weight but today early morning today I did aerobic. A lot of it. The tiredness is something. But in the day before that. I had what felt like a sudden, powerful emotional insight of a situation in my past. Where I could not believe that I had tolerated a certain disrespect. It felt like if I had the time again I would have killed the person involved. I started to think of this in an extremely positive light. If this level of darkness is about to be cleaned out of my body with an exercise session, I am improving very quickly indeed! I also had the theory that my mind had kept the thought and feeling hidden until I was able to handle it and I had the additional thought. That why was I writing songs, when I can write them. Usually about women? When obviously this emotional realisation might be a resource to talk about things like this, and the larger situation it related to, in my songs?

The insight into the insight.

Anyway, 20 minutes into the rowing machine. For reasons I won't mention but that are in the Law of One. I got a further insight. Which is that this insight was not an actual insight. It felt like it was negatively inspired. It felt quite clearly that it was negatively inspired and with that sudden insight into what is negatively inspired and what it feels like. It also suddenly felt like I had an insight into what that negative influence is like in general. 

I felt that my inability to write music for a long time now might be linked to this. (Although I can play fine!)

There are a lot of follow ons from this. The negative greeting appears to have fit into my mental model because it fits into a truth I have decided and... perhaps experienced. The question now is, was the model I thought about earlier actually correct? I put it together some months ago, and have believed it for a long time. But I do not know that it is. It may be that the entire model was faulty and perhaps part inspired by said negative beings. (Interestingly, this false insight I have referred to happened at the same physical location as the original insight that started off the larger "salvation through exercise" model). Or that it is correct but that particular emotion was not part of that process.

My feeling is that the entire model was incorrect. Today I feel great and am having insights, possibly due to a kind of body reset and exhaustion. The biological stress is temporarily gone. But it might just be that with exercise. I feel better. I am clearer, and so have more insights. This complex idea about digging into the darkness of my subconscious needn't be included!

One of the things that to me, adds to this. Is that when I had the false insight. My sudden thoughts were that the music I was making was somehow pathetic and imperfect. That I should be writing music more in line with the new insight. This is simply a complex justification for disliking what I am and what I have already made. Yes, I have made a lot of songs that focus on women. That is just me, it was the music I wrote. 

What really helps.

The feeling that has gone with all this was fantastic. But, I imagine. Temporary. It is like one of those enlightenments newbies get when they are starting the spiritual process. It is powerful, and I feel great. But it is not the point. The point is to put in longer term tools that will practically help.

There are two that I can think of:

One; despite the fact that it is a very difficult belief to practically have in this world. One that will get you accused of being schizophrenic. And one that I feel might be less effective than a skeptical/ atheistic leaning. To consciously recognise there are negative entities out there doing things. Playing with thoughts. I think is an important thing to do. This has been maddening to me before. But it is something I feel I need to acknowledge going forward.

I have done this a little bit in real terms. Sometimes I sleep with the Law of One book 2 when I am feeling particularly bothered. I also use the Law of One book 2 whenever I meditate. It is also relevant to praying... which is one of those things I don't always do. But do intend to do daily. 

But I have not previously consciously considered the relevance of negative beings and I have decided that perhaps I should. After this experience specifically.

Two; one of the things that I have found actually does help is philosophy. I had an insight from a youtube covering Simone Weil. Simone talked about how there is something within us that desires to be obedient to something larger than ourselves. She talks about how freedom is not a thing that is definitively desireable. That many people that have a lot of bad options are not as happy as those with fewer good options that align with their value system. 

This is the first real doubts I have had about the desireability of long term freedom. I am not saying that limits of freedom need to be imposed by a state. Maybe a community or some other thing. But I have come significantly away from the kind of liberal belief that freedom in all cases is a force for good.  

This lead me to an insight into when I played music. I was far younger. And I was a leftist. Or I hadn't thought about politics that much. But with that viewpoint. With that model of reality made from teenage soaps like the OC. I trusted in the goodness of authority and believed if I made music my life might turn out in a good way based on the benevolence of authority and society.

Since I crashed out of that centrist kind of opinion. I do not have any faith in authority. I do not trust that if I put my all into music and don't think of things further, society will look after me and make a way for me in music. I do not have faith in society. I am older now so I wouldn't expect that due to age. But this problem started up when I was still of the age I could make a good career in music. (Assuming the music industry wasn't completely rigged).

And since having this insight. My music has suddenly improved. It has more life and power. 

Further insights.

I see Simone Weil, like I referred to previously. As someone of the rough angelic quality of Carla Rueckert. Her insights are powerful. I should do an article on her potentially but, I don't think I could cover her better than the video from Joe Folly, whose youtube channel is 'unsolicited advice'. 

The point being is that I feel that philosophy somehow provides protection against these things. In some way it orders the mind with insights that give something or explain something to a person. These are people that lived in our world rife with negative greeting. And they thrived. So their perspectives must have some merit. 

Anyway, that's all for the moment.