Looking at the other side.

A bit of a weird one today. 

Recently, I have gone back on X. I realised I probably would. In the stresses and grumbles of life, especially with the occasional medical issues I am faced with. There are down times and times when discipline is not going to be high. Also, I am kind of lonely in a sense. I think this is at a level less than a lot of people experience. I am naturally an introvert. But given a couple of weeks off X, I did eventually go back. 

I have things that I have wanted to say about the Law of One (for a change right?) Working on grander philosophical ideas. But I just wanted to try my hand at this tweet in general:

Female psychology. Not exactly being an area that I specialise in. I still have observed certain things over the years. This blog is not quite as serious as some of my previous ones. A lot of blogs, ones that focus more on the Law of One and other philosophical or self improvement points. I am looking for the truth in these ideas and they are important for me to get right. This subject is one I do not expect to get right. I do not expect that I can and to get it right, I would think you would need to pay attention to someone in this area that honest, highly intelligent, and capable of looking objectively at things like research. So someone that had written a book on this kind of thing. 

But I can observe. This is a "shooting the sheet" kind of post. 

A) The "churn" of the female heirarchy.

I remember working, in the mid to late 2010's, in an office where a lot of the women did not like me. It was an ongoing bullying situation. I don't know the reason this was. There were any number of unusual things about me these women perhaps didn't like. But I had a strong instinct, based on previous experience as well. That the reason I was getting targeted here was that I looked good. That I was attractive. Not because of anything actually bad. 

The issue started before I had any real insight into it. I started working there and for six months I was not invited out socially. I finally was and a woman there made a huge fuss about something tiny that I said. I will not say what this was. But I will say I have repeated this to others in my life and they were shocked someone could get upset over something so little. 

This began a two year campaign of bullying where this woman made sure that anyone who came into the business, any woman that sat next to me. I would talk to and everything would be fine. Then she would not be allowed to talk to me. So I would say hello and she wouldn't respond. Shortly after they would leave. So there was this massive turnover at the company. Whether this was the only issue is unlikely. But I think, from seeing the womens strong reactions, that it was a significant one for them. 

I recall, one of the only longer term workers there did sit next to me one day and was shaking. Properly shaking. 

It strikes me that we are in this time in our society where women have a certain amount of immunity for any and all push back from moral error. The relationships with the highest rate of domestic violence are lesbian relationships. Followed by straight relationships. And the lowest is gay male relationships. 

I had a horrible time at this business, and the other places I have worked, because of women. But I do not actually have to spend any time with them that I do not want to spend with them. Perhaps that is because I am not working and that is partly due to disability. But, even if I were to be working. I can go in and go out of a business and not engage with women that much. Beyond "hi", "yes I had a good weekend" etc. 

Women do not have that option. Womens lives have integrated social groups and a fair number of people they cannot avoid. Which means that if women in general are narcissistic and entitled like many manosphere types claim. (And while I don't agree with that, I cannot disprove through direct experience). That also means that women are subjected to each other. In a way they cannot escape.  

This also goes for many other areas. For instance, womens friendships are known to be fickle and back stabbing. There are literal movies about this. I have often thought that nature planned this so that eventually, to escape this madness, women run to the arms of a male protector that ("hits yummy animals with clubs" (hunts) "steak taste good",) and has no taste for drama. But the world, being as it is, sometimes disables that mechanism. And women still have to deal with other women once they are in a relationship.

B) Living in a world without correction. 

I had a very close friendship with a woman for a while. Rather a tragic story. Like she stepped out of a Tim Burton film. She had been very beautiful when younger. Had deep eyes, was a Pisces, and eventually killed herself. We used to work through a book I was reading at the time from a PhD psychologist, that listed a lot of things she experienced as Borderline Personality Disorder. 

The 'female intrasexual competition' had been brutal on this girl. But, one of the things I noticed was how much her attempting to put together a model of the world had pushed her in a bad direction. 

As I said before. The world seems to have sorted itself into a place where women do not get a lot of accountability for their actions. While many of them might like this. Even if they are incapable of appreciating anything. This can lead in the direction of giving a person really confused models of how to deal with reality. 

One example of note. Women often get told, and often believe; like, actually believe, that men do not have emotions. Once they are suddenly in a relationship though. They find out that... This is not the case. It is actually so not the case they are often in danger. A lot of men, obviously, have deep wounds going back to childhood. Men are incentivised to show their best to women a lot of times to get laid. But they cannot keep this up a few months into the relationship. 

They can have many delusions and the reason is that no one is incentivised to tell them the truth. Men want to sleep with them, and a lot of women lie to avoid conflict. It is sometimes hard, seeing as when someone does tell them the truth they are shunned, to see this as a legitimate problem for the women. But it does cause a great deal of suffering for them.  

I have sometimes wondered with attractive women, if they are naturally being sorted towards people that are naturally not as good as the ones that stand back and are not interested in the drama; a narcissist wants the pretty girl on his arm. But I don't have much to say on that. Women very consciously choose 'the bad boy'. So perhaps that thought does not have legs. 

Back to the tweet.

I should probably go back to the original tweet here. I do not take it as legitimate that women have a common experience of being nice to men and then getting rage back from them because sexual interest was assumed. Having been bullied in multiple jobs by women and often, only women. And having a similar thing happen outside my work life in my social groups. I don't take this to be a legitimate generalised female issue. I consider this person a mutant, if she is nice to men.  

I would not say that I have anger that women have more sexual attention than I do. I have actually turned down a lot of sexual attention. I would say a lot of men have anger at women for the things those women do to them. And the list is not small. DEI hiring. Family court. As larger political issues. 

This woman says that she finds it dysfunctional being nice to men. But what is the alternative? If women, in general, are not nice to men. Then that would be a legitimate reason for men to not like them, correct?

Then there are these other issues. An eating disorder. Not being able to leave the house without make up. I would say these things are secondary, and a part of, the first issue I have outlined here. 

Conclusion.

I don't think women, morally, on the collective level, really have a leg to stand on. But they don't need one. The simps will step in and be their legs for them. The redistribution of resources, via violence, from men to women. One quarter of Gen Z being aborted and the march of feminism through the Western World. Is... irredeemable. 

But on the individual level. As far as individual experiences go. I would say they do have things to deal with. I don't know if they are on a par with men because how could anyone judge that? But I do consider it a possibility that, in accord with the Law of One. It is possible that within the same society. Male and female experience is roughly equivalent. As women harm men, through left wing policies and taxation. They then don't have men to love them. And even if they "don't need no man". They do, in fact, need men. 

 

 

Formatting. 

The Lonely World.

Todays Video:

Youtube: Shelby Exists and Makes Stuff: Most People Don't Have Friends These Days. November 5th 2026:

https://youtu.be/RjrhtdZ-mSA?si=A8hyinza10xFvBKU

I wanted to talk about this video. Because it builds on what I said in my last post. My last post I kind of summarised the difficulties I have had with modern communication. And maybe it's not just me. Maybe it's pretty much everyone. Like this girl says. 

I am reading Atlas Shrugged at the moment. It is a very powerful book. Possibly the best book I have ever read. And if not; one of the best two or three series. I am not that far through it. And the books plot is unravelling a mystery as to how things in their dystopian world actually got quite as bad as they are, so I don't fully know what has gone wrong with their society. But the basis of the book is against socialism. The high achievers are working hard to save the society and the socialists are undermining them. 

Something really good about the book, and fictional stories through books in general. Is that everything is grippable. So more understandable. Than things are in this society. In our society. The 'negative forces' are unbelievably complex and include many, many different interest groups, psychologies and hidden complexities. You have the Communists, the feminists, the violent immigrants and their supporters. The overly passive. The grand agenda with the WEF, world Banks and various other things. The different countries. 

But in Atlas Shrugged. We focus on just one. We focus on the socialists. 

The socialists are more of a hidden danger than a lot of these other dangers. Invading Muslims commit crime and set up human trafficking at industrial scales. Feminists shout and complain and bully and are exhausting in their endless energy towards death. They invade movies. Destroy entertainment. Brainwash young women into making viral man hating Tik Toks. 

But socialists do none of these things. While if you actually engage in politics, they are there. If you go to University, you can hear them talk about things. Mostly they do none of these things. They sit back, in their Councils. In their little meetings. In admin of places like the NHS. And they take all the resources that are coming in from the taxation system that is now automatic. That people don't even pay attention to. They increase taxes. Incrementally. Like the boiling frog. And most of that money goes somewhere we wouldn't agree with. Like the USAID situation. To shoring up the left when they don't have any legitimate support. To wars. 

But while they are invisible. They are still 'there'. As I said, the conversation at the beginning of the book was just like one of the conversations I had with a long term friend that I mentioned yesterday. Socialists, have a passionate and tyrannical belief that you should have the emotions, that they wish to exploit. They do not like the transaction of 'I will provide x, if you provide y'. They prefer the interaction of 'You will provide y on my terms, and I will provide endless emotional energy to force you to do so'. 

I have been thinking of this a bit since reading the book. That a lot of people, all over the world, have what I would call 'retarded' beliefs. Ayn Rand makes a good show of the kind of conversations these people have. Conversations not completely unlike some I have heard at University while studying politics. For me, thinking of the vast amount of people with these kinds of beliefs and the kinds of conversations they might have. Is insane. It is something I had never thought about before. But all over the world. People of this political persuasion. And there are many millions of them. Are having conversations of the same, annoying, formulaic, kind. Filled with emotional blackmail.

As I have read this book and had these thoughts though. As I also mentioned in the last blog. I have started to question the world more than I had initially. Ayn Rands book has many truly inspiring male characters. And I realise that I have been missing those inspiring male characters in my own life. The closest that I have come is paying attention to Stefan Molyneux for a few years. Before that, I paid attention to David Wilcock. Who was only ever 'inspiring' because of lies, and for lack of other male role models. 

I had assumed, as I think we all do, when I was younger, and carried it through. That the world as it was presented was the 'normal' world. It has been a function of my consciousness that I have taken in the millennial mythology presented by the media. The OC adjacent idea you just kind of sail through life and things work out in due course. But the world as it is, I have come to believe. Is not the 'real' one in a sense. As in, it is not the natural world as 'God' in a sense, would have designed it. Where men are men and women are women and there are exceptional and gifted people who are helping society. I am living in a society, which, is analogous to one that has lost a war. Inspiring men and things in the world do not now exist because socialists, behind the scenes. Have made every single effort possible to undermine them. 

This is the world we now live in and this, I think; is the reason that everyone is so isolated. The economy is not functioning for the Western populace. It keeps crashing due to socialist policies and the lack of money definitely reduces social opportunities in a big way. Not only with 'work friends'. But with people not having the money to pursue their own interests and groups. Not having the money to go out and have fun and to date. 

We are also sitting on the longer term agenda of feminist. That is... misery. Mens groups haven't been allowed to form for many decades now. Womens have, you can have womens gyms and exclusive womens groups. But not mens groups. They are always sued by feminists.

I think this is another big part of it. The thing is with womens groups and women socialising, is that women do not care about anyone outside themselves. You will not get a group of women seek to include men in anything (as I have learned in many jobs). And women will tend to like to chat and not really do much. Men are the ones that organise in a way that seeks to attract women. First men deal with each other. Then, after a while, they seek to include women in some capacity. 

Socialising has become disconnected, shallow and prioritises women to a huge degree. Because that is female friendships, when women are allowed to socialise and men aren't. The society becomes female dominated. Mens socialising usually corrals around purpose. Which has now been lost in our society. 

Anyway, like I said then. The point I am making. Is that the situation I talked about in my last post are probably not specific to me really. But are experienced by a great deal of people as our society has become dysfunctional. 

The power of principles.

I am learn-ding. As Ralph from the Simpsons says! A few minutes ago I was completely unable to write this blog. I also had these strange feelings of malevolence, of being "unprotected". And I had forgotten my prayers and affirmations today. I did them, and the blog was just 'there' all of a sudden in my mind. I would have preferred to do the prayers earlier today but was genuinely rushed off my feet. My tasks were being fit in to the minute! 

The details I am going to drop here are personal details, stuff I would not share with a large audience. But things that I think are OK to share with anonymous people online. Some that are from places like Kentucky, according to my stats. Which is not going to effect my personal life. Is not going to uncomfortably expose anyone or make anyone feel uncomfortable. 

It is one of those things in life that what we have to express is often not valuable without honesty. Honesty often includes pettiness. It is a hard line to walk to remain honest and avoid unneccessary pettiness! Pettiness is a shared human experience! 

So, I have the theory that a lot of our basic thoughts have a point. So, I noticed that some of my thoughts are relevant to the future and I have a belief and faith in the Q narrative. I believe that in the future, we need to get to the paradigm the Law of One describes. The Q narrative is the most likely route to meet that. A lot of the Q posts do check out. Although, it is not healthy to actually engage with it in my view. (Going to the Law of One's discussion on 'transcience'.)

The perfection of everything. 

So I believe, and believed FAR more strongly when I was pathologically political. That in the future, there will likely be a mass arrest and events that will level the playing field a great deal in relation to status. If a fair few people in my life are not that pleasant, since I don't follow their left wing political views. There was a time I relished, as a revenge fantasy. Those people losing out and me being obviously correct. Now I no longer do. My personal life and health is improving and I do not think so much about that kind of thing. I also, am changing some of my viewpoints in powerful ways, but that is for another post!

But today I had the insight. Even if that never were to happen. As it might not. Or it might look very different. These kinds of thoughts prepare me for a future where the power dynamics have changed. Which they might do for any number of reasons. I am basically thinking of and subtly planning for, preparing for, a reality where I have more power and status than I do now. So the thoughts, even if they ended up being incorrect, are actually quite productive. The use of power probably will be relevant to my future in some manner! 

Which brings me to the theory I wanted to discuss. I have often wondered about the nature of revenge and revenge fantasies. Revenge was talked a little against in the bible I would say. But I want to separate a kind of unhealthy revenge from this discussion. An unhealthy revenge I would define, is that the person was completely justified in doing what they did. But I did not like it. This is in contrast to a person claiming to be a friend, claiming the honour position of 'friend' and then doing unfriendly things. Because the latter chose the obligation, and potentially received through the deception. The unhealthy revenge is say... I want a connection with a girl and she does not want one with me. If I were to take revenge on that in a physical way, I don't think that would be right because her not wanting anything to do with me is her own sovereignty. Her own free will. 

I do think there is a place for the second type in that, if I ask a girl out, she says no, then I gain in status and she looks regretful I can enjoy that. But I do not think 'revenge' in this circumstance is generally justified.

I am also not talking about serious revenge here. Not like... physically beating someone up. I just mean general petty grudges.

But I suspect, these little annoyances... Have a place. The people that have put us down and that we would like status to push back on them. I think this might be, in some cases, a positive indication of the right direction. 

And so, this is where I end this blog. I had fully expected to go far further. It is all in my mind. But somehow I know I do not need to write further (Narrators voice... But he did, in fact, write further!). A point I was going to expand on with examples, is the idea that aligning with principles, such as those found in the Law of One and other places. Is likely to align you with what that 'revenge' would be against people that have treated you badly. 

The two modes. 

I have also noticed a concurrent insight. I have essentially two modes. One is the emotion I had since I was a child and this includes a great deal of sentimentality. The other, is the part of me that has grown up on the kind of information I talk about on this blog. The second part is the "correct" part, so to speak! What feels correct to me. This also connects to insights I have had recently about service to self and service to others. And left and right wing politics. Which is that the environment we see today is the result of the left being mostly successful. The left, the service to self, make a huge drama of not being given further concessions as though this was the worst thing in the world. They never appreciate anything they have 'achieved'. All the misery and death they have achieved so far. 

This conceals the fact that they have actually done quite a lot so far. The welfare state has managed to create huge amounts of single mothers and with their various successes. The baseline levels have changed. With that, it means we have to doubt a lot of what is just 'normal' in order to arrive at what is healthy. For me, one of the realisations I have had is the complete lack of strong male role models. Really strong inspiring men in life. 

Where this links in is that I said I have two modes. A childish emotional side and a more correct part that is reliant more on principles. Believes in things more. The principled version is that of a 'strong man' and that, is something that I had not completely understood existed, before the insight I just described. 

So I will give a good example of this. A personal example I did not want to share. But I will. When I was young, and unwell, but I did not know it. One of the people that was relevant in my life was my little half-sister (referred to just as 'sister' from this point on for brevity). More than a decade younger than me. 

I have mentioned her casually before. On my fathers death bed he asked me to look after her. Which... was kind of stupid. My father was the kind of person so disconnected from reality he did things that "appeared" to be correct, because that's what he thought he should do. In my view. By the time he died he was a severe alcoholic, so severe that morphene would not work on him! And he had done crimes in his past that, perhaps they ate at his conscience, although he never expressed anything like that. Or perhaps he lived without one. Perhaps it is some confusing mix between those two. 

Because of this, I have put a lot of energy to connecting with my sister, a lot of messages to connect. But, this is of a semi compulsive nature. My early life was spent in 'mysticism' I would say, with a dose of schizophrenia. I assigned virtue to compulsions I had to do things. I was "guided". 

As I have grown though, the second person I mentioned has grown. The person that is connected to more objective things. Also to the Law of One. 

One of the things I feel "guided" to do every so often is contact my sister. To process things in my extremely powerful cerebral manner (i.e. this blog!) To try and smooth over the rough edges and communicate whatever I think is interesting or profound.  

And what tools do I have against such a powerful inner compulsion? Well, contacting my sister has not been very successful. In fact, it has been constantly rebuffed. I have had to accept the idea that she does not like me. Perhaps that's too harsh. Perhaps she considers me a kind of annoyance but the feeling would not go as far as "dislike". Rather like how you don't actively dislike bird poop falling on your jumper. You are mildly annoyed and disgusted, put the shirt in the wash, and carry on with your day. 

Against this clear contradiction. I have found a Law of One quote to help me. Now I am not saying anything about my sisters character. But even if she did have any service to self tendencies. I imagine she is service to others with a tiny amount of service to self. The kind a normal positive wanderer would have. But the advice in this quote still stands:

Questioner: Thank you. In closing that part of the discussion I would just say that if there is anything that we can do that is within our ability— and I understand that there are many things such as the ones that you just mentioned that are not within our ability— that we could do for this particular entity, if you would in the future communicate its requests to us we will at least consider them because we would like to serve in every respect. Is this agreeable to you?

Ra: I am Ra. We perceive that we have not been able to clarify your service versus its desire for service. You need, in our humble opinion, to look at the humor of the situation and relinquish your desire to serve where no service is requested. The magnet will attract or repel. Glory in the strength of your polarization and allow others of opposite polarity to similarly do so, seeing the great humor of this polarity and its complications in view of the unification in sixth density of these two paths.

When I get this instinct. And I have let in the more nightmarish compulsion adjacent part of my dreams recently. This is the wisdom I use to oppose it. Contacting my sister, is not going to go anywhere. Even if I said 'everything right'. There is not enough connection there to make a connection. 

But without daily reading of the Law of One and keeping the "second person" in place. I would probably yield. Go back to messaging her like a schizophrenic, and have her avoid and ignore me.  

The point here, which links to what I am just about to say. Is that the 'second person' is delivering a different message than the first. The young emotional self. I think the principles used by the 'second person' in this example. Does deliver a kind of justice or "revenge", or something like that.  

The Q narrative 

And this is where I connect back to the Q narrative that I started with, and something that links with the general 'revenge fantasy' kind of mindset. 

In the Q narrative, the good guys have taken over and are now engaging in a kind of positive psy op to awaken the population. But what does that mean for us on the 'normal level'. While we kind of sit through societal dysfunction? We are not in danger. But we have not moved into a positive place where service to self viewpoints can be challenged and done away with yet! 

For me, what this seems to mean, is that people that dug their heels in at COVID and acted in various disrespectful ways due to their perceived higher status than me (which would be correct, given my disability!) Have had the opportunity to really prove who they are.

I had two of these situations recently. One was a friend, whom I had broken contact with because he had cancelled about twenty arrangement (disrespect!) sometimes clearly having an opportunity to communicate clearly and not saying anything so I turned up anyway. I broke contact with this person clearly. But this person was very apologetic and wanted to meet up again. So I did meet up again. For one time. The second time we met up, some of this personal issues got sorted out because he got a phone call and now... He has gone back to being disrespectful. 

A second one was a very long term friend who is now a passionate socialist. The conversation I had with him is exactly like the one that Dagny Taggart has with her brother at the beginning of Atlas Shrugged. The fact was that there was no way of connecting. The guy had, more than socialist tendencies in discussion. He also had very specific ideas about how emotional other people should be and what their views should be. Just like James Taggart. 

I went through the ringer with these two and now am back out of contact with them I think. It is not official with the first one, but there is not a lot of time to undo the 'rudeness'. 

The conversations after I thought about it though. DID serve a function. And they served the function of closing the door. And I think that is a beautiful thing. Because the door was half open for both of them. The first one because an apology could get him back through it. The second because I did not fully know the issue was not due to my own illness and craziness at an earlier time. Relating with that person once I was sane was very clarifying for me! 

The insight. 

Of the two inner beings I talked about. The first person would not want these connections closed. The second person though, does not care about the people involved. The lesson gained from the experiences, and the principles involved. Are what is important.  

It's not really revenge I am talking about is it? The goal here is lack of sentimentality. A clean break. Where revenge might become relevant is if the Q narrative were to happen. I think the principles involved would lead me to not connect with these people, and if the societal changes happening were traumatising for them. Well that's some tough crap!

It is an insight that is opposed to the codependency friendly version of the Law of One teachings, and Christianity, that a lot of people promote! 

A tool very often used in some of these interactions I have noticed. Is the false apology! The false apology was used once by my sister. She apologised and then went right back to the offending behaviour. And then by the second of the two individuals I mentioned. But the lesson I should have learned with my sister was to ask questions. Apologising for what? What behaviour do you think was wrong and how would you change it? What values do you think motivated it? Many other questions like this that refuse to let a person off the hook without genuine contrition and contrition, is hard, almost impossible for these sorts of people. 

The kind of people that are putting you down for their own status anyway, are not able to yield status in contrition. If the questioning goes deep enough into their values, such as, a big part of the issue will be leftism in some way. That is an extremely close belief they will not want to have questioned or part with.

These experiences are kind of hardening and clarifying the theoretical basis I have for dealing with people. 

Like I said, the second person, the person of the principles. CANNOT just flip to the old way of being. If someone wants to communicate it's like "OK, but I have, one hundred times tried to deal with people without questioning and getting answers on their values, so I will not do that this time". This is the only logical answer. But it also prevents a potential hurdle that some people, these kinds of people, cannot get over!

So, like I said, the principles, positive principles; correlate with the "revenge fantasy". 

Conclusion.

Not sure all this was that interesting or relevant. But I think the idea that are grudges are actually an indication in the right direction, and not something to be thrown out in favour of some "love" based spiritual idea. Is one that is worth considering! 

Knowing the facts!

So, haven't posted for a few days. Because, I wanted to have the benefit of meditation. 

I have meditated daily for a short while now and... It IS the answer. Not so much the answer in itself. But it seems to provide just a sense of improvement and good luck to the rest of my life. If I meditate, I am more likely to pray. If I meditate, I sleep better. I am in a better mood. Etc. 

I also think I am getting good results from the general things I am doing. A lot of things I have taken from the Law of One and other improvements, such as drinking a lot of water. Have really improved my life recently. 

The issue I described earlier of, because I have not been doing meditation. Losing a sense of direction. Not knowing what to read or why to read it. Has definitely changed since the daily meditation. I do know what to read and think and I am doing that. But I do not have conclusions on those things yet. I have thoughts on those things. But not conclusions that can be communicated. 

I wanted to make a quick note here though. On a thought that I have had. Since coming off X I have definitely felt an improvement, since not engaging with X, I have appreciated political youtube more. Not red pill political. No more of that. I don't need to know about female psychology at the moment. But political theory, history, and sometimes a video on political events.

I was surprised though. With the Russell Brand situation. I have seen it pop up a few times. While I know there are a fair few people that believed Russell to be guilty. I did not click on those. A few creators have made videos on the whole thing not being right and being a 'he said she said' situation. 

That though, is not correct! I asked Grok. In one case, the one where the most serious crime was tried. There was substantial evidence including medical. Three more where sexual assault was alleged and I suppose now. Convicted. And three more that were dismissed. If those cases were dismissed. It kind of lends credence to the idea that the courts are doing their job, rather than assuming him to be guilty. 

There were 340 witness statements including statements from the victims families saying that certain behaviour was grooming. One of these cases was when Russell was 30 and the girl involved was 16. There are further charges being investigated.

A lot of people in the comments are saying things like that they don't believe the case because it is a case of withdrawn consent years later. Or that it is because the establishment is after him.

They said that about Andrew Tate as well. But the claims about Andrew Tate coming out are so bad, and so unlikely to be made up. That no one is talking about it. 

The reason I suppose that this has annoyed me. Is that, I have not once made a video on an existing political situation. I think I have made some videos casually referring to the red pill. I like to talk about political theory. But I have never made a video on something like the Russell Brand situation but if I were to. I would be sure to do a LOT of research so I knew my facts. I just wouldn't want to get something like that wrong.

For a lot of people on youtube. That doesn't appear to be the case.  

The Law of One and the Absolute Primacy of Meditation.

I forget myself sometimes. 

If you listen to most Christian preachers. There will often be a message that comes up again and again. Pray. Pray- pray- pray- pray- pray!

In the llresearch community. In the Law of One communities. There is a similar repeated message. The primacy of love is one of them. Although I don't strictly agree with that. But another message, that I do agree with, strongly. Is the primacy of meditation.

Like how a Christian preacher mentions prayer every video. I think there are not enough times that I could also make a post about meditation. 

I have had my own insight on this specific card. The value we experience in life, often comes from the subconscious. Which is the bird in the cage there. I notice that the ball the person is focusing on. Which I think is a representation of the positive types of things we can focus on (like spirituality or prayer or meditation, whatever it is for us!) Is separate from the value that can actually be provided in the real world.

The mind does not move. It has no movement. The person in this image cannot move forward, lest he trip over the bird cage. So he focuses at the ball, but the benefit comes to him indirectly.

I think that is how the mind works. We push forward in some way, and it provides the value. But it doesn't always provide the value (the bird) by actually FOCUSING on the thing that provides the value. Sometimes, we have to stay spiritually aligned, and the value comes from elsewhere. In fact, maybe not just sometimes. The card would indicate it is a fundamental mechanic.

The physical world. 

I have noticed that strongly with the gym. I love the gym. It makes me feel alive. But I never get to the gym unless I meditate and keep up with my spiritual practices. These are often coincidental reasons. But I do not attribute this exclusively to spirituality. Meditation tunes me in a way that I am just a small percentage, maybe 5%+, better on every single decisions. And this mounts up. I just make slightly better decisions, and it can get me to the gym.

The last time I didn't get to the gym I knew this. I meditated the next day, and I went to the gym the next day.

But meditation, as a practice. Is so impossibly positive and powerful it needs to be done more than that and I have not been meditating recently. 

I notice when I meditate. Things immediately come into focus. The problems I think are problems. That I have thought about a lot. Are actually not problems. They are often a little bit amusing! The worries I have are not so strong. 

There are two sides of my recent output that might be relevant. Firstly, the reason I might be turning away from a lot of things at the moment is that I have lost an 'inner star' in a sense. An inner sense of direction so everything starts to feel a bit disconnected. Secondly, even though there may be a confused and/ or incorrect aspect of my recent insights. There is a definitively positive one. Coming off X means that I am less interested in politics in general. The current US mid terms are important politically. And I am GENUINELY not paying attention. 

The next thing the Q people get excited about. Like they got excited sometime last month about the Q post including "11.3 verifies as the first marker and confirms future direction" (that might not be an exact quote!) When they think a mass arrest is going to happen at Christmas or something. I actually won't know about this.

This provides a place, where there would have been a large energy expenditure. Politics is the opportunity to engage in irrelevant drama. But in that place. I can now meditate. I can now really appreciate peace. 

I think that is all I have to say. The trouble is with this subject is that it feels there should be a book written about it. There is more I have to say. But the point stands on its own and the point, is largely individual anyway. I experience certain sensations, certain insights in a reliable style, when I meditate. But many people will experience completely different sensations. 

I do though, feel powerless, in that I don't seem to be able to make myself remember how good meditation is and to do it daily. I have had a few small health problems and other things these past weeks. In fact, it is only now I have adjusted my medication that I have had this insight. But it is still annoying how I do not do meditation as frequently as I feel is necessary. I do suspect that without that 'tuning'. A good section of what I do has less purpose to it than I would otherwise have if I had kept up with the meditation.  

Using catalyst properly.

I have, for the longest time, stayed aprised of the output of a lot of youtubers that talk about narcissism and such. The reason being, as I see it. Is that I am kind of 'neurodivergent' in a way. In that, because of my physical health condition. I think a bit differently, and I am vulnerable, in a sense. 

I do have the positive thing of not having a lot to offer anyone that would want to exploit me. Someone that is a friend of mine is not going to suddenly find themselves out on the town with a bunch of beautiful women. There is 'no gold to dig', so to speak. When I say a positive thing, I do not mean that sarcastically. I recall a dream I had once where I was from a rich family with friends and lovers that were not real friends and lovers; and everybody being left wing and I couldn't say anything about it. 

Every positive, has a potential negative attached to it. Money and social status are those honours that can also be burdens. 

So, I infrequently meet manipulative people. But I have, in the past, known manipulative people. I have thought through, fairly complex manipulations that happened in work places. Learning all the buzz terms of narcissism such as 'triangulation'. When I first found this material I watched a video a day. Now, before the insight that lead to this article. I only followed two youtubers that discuss this subject and would check in just every so often. Maybe once a week. 

This entire subject reminds me of the subject of what is 'transcient'. Transcient is how the Law of One described conspiracy information. I got very into conspiracy for a few years. Very into. Like, every day into. But I have come away from it slowly but surely to this point now where I don't even go on X. Which is the lightest conspiracy there is. Since it only comes up in 1/20 posts or so. And even then, very mildly.

With these things. With both narcissism info and conspiracy. I have started to believe that engaging with both of them is not positive for what I want in my life at this moment. The reason is simple. When things happen in our lives. We get anxious in dealing with them. When I, and people around me, experience a lack of clarity about the future. Due to a truly terrible job market. Due to having absolutely no clear idea of what is going to happen in the future politically (Well, I have some Q understanding, but that is a bit obscure!). This is an experience of anxiety. And I could, if I wanted, go onto various very technical political sources. Promethean Action for example. But this would get rid of that anxiety. It would put me in a technical mindset and maybe, the catalyst of providing me anxiety. Is for me to process without outside sources.

A similar thing with narcissism info. I recently got a message from a friend, a friend that was close enough once upon a time for this to cause deep emotions.  I was trying to reconnect with him and, this will sound ridiculous and made up but it is not far away from what was said; "I am sorry I responded legitimately to you being a FUCKING ASSHOLE" - Unironically labelled as a legitimate apology. It took me several days, and running this through AI, to realise; it was not a proper apology!

But, what of processing this on my own? Away from narcissism videos? Well, it caused emotion. The emotion means thinking these things over and coming to my own conclusions. It actually meant I started to make a good song. ("It starts 'I'm sorry you're such an asshole, my apology might need some work!'") Whereas, one of the youtube channels I used to follow, someone I hold in high regard. Made a video about the false apology of the narcissist about ten days before I got the email, that really explained everything in, what I feel to be, obviously correct, terms. 

But it takes the entire thing away from my own processing. When I am thinking this through myself I come to less clear conclusions. But, the conclusions that I will come to will be more useful to me and hence, will be remembered better. Why am I not completely immune to manipulation tactics having watched many hundreds of videos by now? Because obviously, it didn't stick. 

A similar thing to what I have recently talked about about in relation to philosophy (or psychology, referencing Carl Jung, either!). As much as I liked it as a tool in the past when I was kind of growing my wisdom. It doesn't seem so relevant now. It does not feel like it provides useful insights. Since the great philosophers wrote down their ideas. Two things have happened. One, those ideas have spread quite far due to the internet. Now even laymen can understand Nietzsche, for example. Two, those same people are intelligent in their own right. The narcissism video on apologies I mentioned, reasons through in fantastic clarity. Youtube is a bit of a free market still. 

I have also already collected information from these sources. It is not like I am rejecting them outright. Only coming away from further information collection.  

One of the best feelings I have known. Was the one I got when I started looking at the Law of One. It is a feeling of being utterly alien but in a positive way. Like an alien, positive vibe was just, 'in everything'. I don't get such a strong feel like that from the Law of One anymore. But I do get it from somewhere else... Dream interpretation, combined with the Law of One. I have three years of dream interpretation to catch up with! It won't be long until it is four! So for me, perhaps the point is to start to create my own ideas on these things?

And, the thing about dealing with narcissistic types of things. Manipulations in general. That has always irked me a little. Is that the discussion is always centred on the manipulator. But actually, when it comes to other people. We will very rarely actually know anything about how they operate internally, especially if they are hiding it. So the focus should obviously be on behaviours we can have in our everyday life that are just naturally positive for us and that discourage these kinds of manipulations and interactions in general. 

Like, an example of this might be the Law of One. The interaction I explained, with the friend that reconnected and it went south. Well, that person is a pure Generator. Who, has always, initiated. Is not interested in the Human Design. And I, being a Manifestor. Was reacting in a way that upset the tempo of his initiations - I was holding him to the standard of someone that should naturally initiate, another Manifestor. This begins to offer a different model as to how to interact. A different way to hold this various information. It actually gave me an insight into why, mechanically, the Generator shouldn't initiate and the Manifestor can. Or said more correctly. The blockage that forms when the Generator initiates.

There are also other things I might put together if I am not disturbing my own processing with outside sources. There have been several times people have tried to manipulate me. I remember, in detail, each one. And what was happening. Why they appeared to do what they did in the larger context. Pulling some of these different examples together I can use pattern recognition to potentially come to other, original conclusions. 

An insight from the Law of One, into the negative polarity. (Session 20.32)

The session and answer is as follows:

Questioner: How would such stone heads influence a people to take the path of service to self?

Ra: I am Ra. Picture, if you will, the entities living in such a way that their mind/body/spirit complexes are at what seems to be the mercy of forces which they cannot control. Given a charged entity such as a statue or a rock formation charged with nothing but power, it is possible for the free will of those viewing this particular structure or formation to ascribe to this power, power over those things which cannot be controlled. This, then, has the potential for the further distortion to power over other-selves. 

There are a lot of parts of the Law of One that are obviously, unspeakably, profound.

This is not one of them. Unlike Session 19.17 or 10.12. This is one of those that sounds like casual, and for practical purposes, irrelevant. But, this kind of passage is the reason it is worth going through the Law of One with a fine tooth comb. In my view, it is actually very important.

What is being said here, is that when people hold a God like being. But not God. Like, a statue, or perhaps a figure like the Native Americans worship animal guides. Or the polytheistic religions in general. Or even, the Law of Attraction often does this; people have been quoted as part of Law of Attraction groups saying things like people deserved Volcanoes destroying their villages because they were thinking wrong. When people, as part of that religion, ascribe to those forces the power over things like... wind. This is actually a negatively polarised way of looking at things.

Which is quite interesting. Because it is quite a frequent way of looking at things within spiritual and religious cultures.

It reminds me of one of David Wilcocks stories. He said that he went out into the forest and it was incredibly windy, and he shouted something about being free as part of some sort of ritual. And the wind immediately stopped after that. 

I have recently talked about stopping with a dream catcher. This has turned out well. It appears that nightmares it was apparently blocking which I am getting now. They seem to ground me. And my ability to write music appears to be returning! 

So I was thinking about what the Dream Catcher probably means on a "magickal" level. The Native Americans were not the peaceful loving people almost all US media seems to paint them as. I picked up Benjamin Franklins autobiography. As Benjamin Franklin is someone that the Law of One advises to study further. Benjamin talks about dealing with them in non positive terms. And they were also known to go to war with each other and use rape as a weapon of war. 

Considering that. It is quite the bastardisation of history to express Native Americans in only positive terms. As they are in the media.

If the Native Americans were like this. Then it would be likely to me that a dream catcher would serve the function of keeping away the most negative parts of their minds so they would not be bothered by their own behaviours and carnage. So the dream catcher was likely, not "negative" per sey. But with negative people. It allowed them to have an apparently positive dream life while being a negative, warlike culture. 

Whereas, in todays culture. Where many of us have not even used a weapon in combat. The apparent 'negativity' in our subconscious minds potentially serves a positive purpose.  

Another person that the Law of One advised to study further was Thomas Jefferson. The founding of America seems to have been given a positive nod by the Law of One. And this did come at the destruction of the Native American culture.