The perfection including dysfunction as found in the human design. 3rd and Final Part.

So here we are then. 

My incarnation cross:

33.6 Disassociation.

The ability to let go. Exaltation. The will to concentrate on revitalisation and not be handicapped by persistent recriminations. The ability to let go, to enjoy privacy. 

19.6: The Recluse.

The avoidance of contact in general but not exclusively. Exaltation: The avoidance of contact in general but not exclusively. The fool on the hill. The sage that if you can find him, will talk to you. The energy which generally fuels avoidance. Detriment: The sulking child. The self imposed exile that will only end when it attracts appropriate and soothing reaction. Oversensitivity to rejection that fuels avoidance. 

2.2 Genius

Unconscious and unlearnable alignment of stimulus and response. The natural. Exaltation: The inner strength to focus and realise. A natural gift for unlearnable knowing. Detriment. Genius as madness. Knowledge exclusively for power for the enhancement of the ego. The delusion that knowledge is power. 

1.2 Love is light.

Exaltation; Venus exalted as a symbol of beauty. The required harmony between established values and ideals that enriches inspiration. Self expression conditioned by ideals and values. Detriment: Desires and passions have their place but not at the expense of creation. Self expression limited by desires and passions.

1.2 is the only one that is not a blue line. I did not include the detriment on 33.6 because I have it in exaltation. 19.6, even from Ra Uru Hu's explanation as far as I understand it. Is not massively different between the exaltation and detriment. 

I have shown my chart a lot of times recently (a cropped version without planetary placements!) I am also referencing the experiences that I talked about in a blog four posts ago now. Where I talked about Master and Slave morality and reflecting on those. But to do so I used a lot of my personal experience to draw off. To say, this is the substance I am working with and this is how it is seen through Master and Slave morality. I will come back to Master and Slave morality in this blog. 

Back to the 51-25 and defined G Self. 

The post describes bullying and difficulty communicating with women. It also references things like social ostracism. 

In my view. You can see this very easily in my chart. But I think the way it flows could use more explanation.

Firstly, as I stated, I have the gate 51.1 in detriment. This means that I am able to absorb a certain amount of trauma. At least this was how Ra Uru Hu described it having his conscious moon there. The trauma I experience is from my medical condition, and then from that, from that and other weaknesses I have; I then get bad social experiences. Like social ostracism and other types of bullying (kind of sexual in at least one instance), that then also become part of the 51.1.

This, combined with my incarnation cross and chart in general. Means that I start becoming more spiritual. This kind of catalyst is how I found the Law of One in the first place. If young me had gotten a girlfriend I was happy with, around 14-15, and a larger social group. Then I may never have looked at the Law of One. Never have found David Wilcock. 

This creates a difficulty with the collective. Namely, I come to conclusions that are not part of the hive mind or as the human design would call it, "the homogenised viewpoint". Things to do with politics/ conspiracy or just things I have experienced. My belief that I am protected via spirituality (so a lack of fear). My interest in spirituality itself. My general intellectualised takes that annoy (and perhaps diminishes) people that haven't thought about things that much. My bad habits as a side effect of my medical condition etc. 

I have a full channel from the gate 51. So the gate 51 travels to the gate 25 and then, it defines the G- self. Which means that, through this specific wisdom, through this flow and connection of two parts of myself. I then become sure of my identity. The channel comes first before the definition in my understanding. Technically, even though it is perhaps unneccessarily precise. I wonder if a centre defined through a different channel is kind of a difference centre. So my 51-25 is a different defined G as a person with the 14-2.

So, we have a defined G, and a defined G without a route to the throat. Meaning it is projected, or as I prefer to call it. It is an 'information centre' so it is binded by free will. When something is binded by free will the second someone doesn't particularly like you and wishes to minimise you. It loses its voice. It is not an energy centre to the throat which can express itself regardless. This is, in my view, part of the mechanic why love is so important. 

But a point I am trying to get to, through all the tangents I evidently keep going on. Is that, I do not believe that once we have a defined centre it is perfect. The defined centre motivates us to improve it through increased knowledge and experience. So my G- Self, as it was, needed further tuning. The "you have wisdom that traumatises others from the gate 51-25 so now you are socially ostracised", is not the end of the process. Now, we have an entire defined centre. So what do we do with it?

It is very much a 'chicken and the egg problem'. What came first, the spirituality and individual viewpoints? Or the social ostracism that these relate to and often seem to be motivated by? But in real life, a lot of these things happen concurrently. Or at least, we are not capable of going back to our childhoods to identify cause and effect that precisely. 

Anyway. This is Stefan Molyneux. He has a G- self which feeds from the Sacral and into the throat. So it is effectively one that can still continue to operate if people try to shut it down. It seems to me strongly that his 14-2 channel reflects his "capitalist" leaning. Although I don't see capitalism as a thing, as though socialism was its equal. I see "capitalism" as simply the way things are when they are not interfered with by malevolence. Capitalism is just trade. But my point is the right leaning element of his platform can be seen here. 

Anyway, unwell and socially ostracised me then finds someone like Stefan Molyneux. A lot of his philosophy is G- self based (As is every point on his incarnation cross). Then, this is used to tune my existing G- Self. Which then further enforces the social ostracism of the original experiences. All that I learned from Stefan Molyneux as well, still has the 51-25 within it. 

Bringing it together. 

So, here's much chart, without planets:

 

I noted my incarnation cross because it is relevant I think. The gate 19.6 is indeed very sensitive and it experiences in the life, the themes of approach and rejection. You might say that with this chart, whether or not I approach a girl (or job or whatever) is likely to become a theme. The office bullying I described was very much hammering on that gate 19. And the experiences I have had being rejected for jobs for years on end would not help it either. It is on an undefined centre. So it is not strongly held or pathologically energised/ angry. But it is there, and, to my mind, with a broken economy and DEI. It is not receiving a lot of "good" catalyst.

It is the only hexagram within my incarnation cross on an undefined centre though. I tend to think, casually, as a hypothesis; that undefined centres are handed over to the world in general. They are not specifically bad. They are conditioned negatively in our world because our world is kind of negative. If we were in a more positive world. The conditioning would be positive, and not an issue.  

If I meet an emotionally defined woman that is just a joy to be around. It effectively provides positive catalyst to that open solar plexus.  

So, in a more positive world that gate 19 and the 'approach' would be felt more positively by me. Rather than simply as more justification to withdraw. 

The gates in my own chart are not the only ones that discuss solitude as a positive either!

But where we have gone here goes back to master and slave morality. As my chart sits, the bad experiences get handled by philosophy. At what point should moral violations be let go of? At what point should revenge be taken and what form should that take? What principles do bad experiences help us to understand. This centre is also, obviously, a potential aspect in my own song writing. Where my own chart invites the information out via the 21-45.

I hope this is not too complicated! 

But the master morality way of handling things. The way I would handle them when I have prayed, eaten properly, journalled and whatever else. is the 21-45. It is meant to be the first way of handling things. And it is far, far more ruthless than anything coming out of the 51-25. But expressed through wisdom. Expressed through what is the relevance of transactional thinking in relationships. And other similar principles. the 21-45 is about providing value and gaining power through that. 

Anyway, hope that all made sense and added to peoples understanding of the human design.  

Break. Mysticism and decision making.

I am breaking off today from the article set I was writing. To talk about something that is of metaphysical/ spiritual interest I think. 

Today, I am suddenly tired in a weird way. A non physical way. I can't think clearly. Which is unusual for me. It is also why I did not jump into that other set of articles. Which are highly technical. 

I have had a dream. An extremely profound dream. I will not describe what the dream was actually about because... You wouldn't believe me. Or, even if a person did. The actual profundity of it could not be explained. I will say, it was inhabiting the "being" of a person that wasn't me; and was a set of emotions that is unfamiliar to me. Which is very "Law of One" adjacent. - The dream had direct and profound implications for ideas I have had. Implications that completely change some of them, or the foundation of new ideas being formed. 

But also, the way I am at the moment is... subtle. But unmistakeable. I do not feel right and I have been eating chocolate. Which often, does not make me feel right. 

Decision making.

The problem I am having with chocolate is. I cannot, through a logical decision making process. Through an objective one. Justify not having it. What do I mean by that. The last time I ate avocado I literally threw up. I suddenly became allergic to avocado as sometimes happens with allergies. I am celiac. I eat wheat and I get quite dizzy and sick. I stopped alcohol for 10 years, when my father, a severe alcoholic, died with a lot of complications. I also realised I was losing entire days with hangovers. 

It's easy to stop something when there is a practical reason like that. Even with the alcohol. Which there wasn't a prohibitive problem. I had a direct, logical reason for why I stopped the thing.

With chocolate. It is not the same. Chocolate and stopping or severely reducing it. (To almost nothing). The only way I can justify doing this is via a kind of "mystical" process. But, for me, I do like to try and follow a logical thought process. Philosophy, first principles and such, is the stuff I admire. 

Each time I have eaten chocolate. The problem associated with that has seemed to be specific to that time. The first issue I had with it was that when I was eating large amounts to solve constipation, I got fat. But once I got proper medication. I could massively reduce the amount I was having so I wouldn't gain weight. Then I got diarrhoea from it. Then I had chocolate before a workout and overdid the workout and strained myself for two weeks. So I just, stopped having it with workouts. Now, right now, it is even vaguer. I just don't feel right. I feel sleepy. I feel "feminine" and ungrounded. I badly want to get back to the state of not having had it. 

There was another issue here and there. Another issue which doesn't seem important or can be easily handled. Each time I have had chocolate there is a different, and apparently, easy to handle problem. But reliably, there is a problem each time, and it is one that messes up my life to an extent of making me have to miss a few workouts or another, very temporary, but very important to me, issue. 

Faith in mysticism.

I am not a fan of making decisions due to signs and wonders. This subtle subconscious whatever is NOT the same as seeing 3:33 on the clock and changing your life because of it. It is potentially legitimate to say your subconscious does not like a substance. 

But, I do not want any more of these very slightly negative "side effects". It seems to me a practical step to eliminate this substance that just seems to be "cursed" from my perspective. 

I may have it, like I said, very, very infrequently. It may be a thing I only have with others as a treat. Since I do not want to justify another way that I am "weird". I have simply had my fill of being the outcast. But despite not having a logical, practical, objective justification like I would like to have. It seems to me I do have to follow where this more 'mystical' thought process has lead.  

The perfection including dysfunction as found in the human design. (Part 2).

So, following on from my last blog post. I will continue just generally talking about human design lines that I think show potentially dysfunctional themes. But, in the end, are still perfect. None of these will be from my own chart.

We intimately know our own charts. It is something that I think we can speak with the most authority on. So consider these next points more in the line of a "fictional character". Like, I can make observations on peoples lives and think through human design lines logically. But I will not have the depth of understanding as I do with a line of my own as I have seen it go through my own chart (assuming I am correct on my own chart!)

13.2:

Bigotry: The risk, always present, that fellowship can only exist for a patricular type, whether racial, religious, national or intellectual.Exaltation: Tolerance as the least offensive manifestation of bigotry. A role of openness through tolerance. Detriment: The obsessive belief that the highest ideals cannot be embraced by the lowest forms. An extremely difficult position, where even the highest ideals provide rationalisation for hatred. A role of openness so narrow that there is practically no one worth listening to. 

So, this line is to do with, I would say. Someone that is destined, through their very chart. To be politically concerned. This seems to me... counterintuitive. But I have a friend with this line who has sent me messages that he did not like I was bringing up right wing points. "Bigotry" is when someone simply believes they're right. They simply are right because they exist. Bigotry in the promotion of moderation though? It is simply a pathological belief that nothing outside the centre of politics should exist.

Like I say. An actual line in a chart that involves someone with political concerns is almost outside my imagination. I imagine them as only using the exaltation; but, to be technically correct they do not have it specifically in exaltation or detriment. It is almost like a line you would expect for someone that lives in a very political environment (my town is highly political). But who has designed a life where they want to be able to get on with a lot of people. They insist that the centre ground, where people can meet, is the only thing that is legitimate. Because if they did not have "bigotry" for that centre ground. Someone else would muscle in on taking the centre stage. Of sharing their own political vision. 

22.2:

Charm School: The belief that style can mask nature: Exaltation: The ability to successfully delude oneself and others. 

David Wilcock, in his conscious Sun! 

Hidden in Plain Sight did the most beautiful tribute to David. I really want to download that video. But I do not have X premium. It was not put on youtube likely because the copyright laws are too stringent. Anyway, if you search on X "@thehiddenpod tribute" you will find it. (Every single time, no matter how many times I see it, and hence, how much I am expecting it; David saying "As a cis gendered, heterosexual male" in his pink shirt cracks me up!)

But yeah, David is a case where it went badly wrong. We can be sure that his life did not work out well according to his true self. But this was his path. Even though he was what he was. He was a crazy person who talked about crazy and (mostly) incorrect things, and really believed them. We can see from this line that he was somehow meant to be that.

It is likely this line was meant to work out better and things were never meant to get so bad that he killed himself. But with this line we can see the basic structure of his life. With the incorrectness included. Is contained in his chart. 

37.5:

Love: Natural and unaffected devotion to the family. Natural Harmony and Perfect Sharing. natural harmony and sharing possible through friendship. Detriment: Emotional dependency that often turns love into hatred. The possibility of dependency turning love into hatred. 

This was talked about in the video in the first part. A line which is literally about "love". The person in my life, or that was in my life, with this line has both the detriment and exaltation. But the exaltation is not interesting. There is no mystery as to how that can fit into a well planned Godly life. The detriment though we can creatively talk about. 

I realise I have to couch a lot of this conversation in terms of 'past life planning' and higher self kind of stuff. I had planned in the intro to mention that. To say that the Law of One passages that talk about that I am taking on faith for this blog. I did not put that in the intro but I am just saying that here. 

But lets imagine... Women. And we will imagine Carla Rueckert. The Law of One states that most of us are here learning lessons (arguably that might not be the case if someone is harvestable to their following density, but it might still be. Carla being sixth density was not there yet I don't think).

Since we know that Carla, the channel for the Law of One. Had got most stuff right. Not everything. But a lot of things. What might we consider is Carla's next place to go in her study of the Law of One?

Well, I recall Carla had a very strong belief in the primacy of women and the female perspective. A perspective that llresearch has continued with and that many modern spiritual places do hold. One example of this is that I recall Carla saying that when women put on revealing clothes. This was only to relate to their friends and she disliked men saying otherwise. She was also proudly left wing. Remarking once that her town had bucked her states (Texas') right wing tide. 

In the current world. If Carla were to have been born again. If a lot of blissed out loving creatures in the ether were to incarnate. I would say, that the temptation to see women and loving tendencies as more the Creator than men would be extremely powerful.

Our modern world has provided the environment to teach this lesson. The primacy of the female and loving perspective in a way that was pushed back on several times in the Law of One material itself. 

I would imagine that this line would provide a great deal of teaching in this area. A woman, desired by the world. Where many people desire to 'possess' her has many choices as to who she will love and who she will not. With this line, that particular issue becomes very energised. It becomes obvious whom she does not love. And she does have to use the option of rejecting love in some circumstances. 

My super cerebral chart. Outside some obvious people. In general, it is not strongly understood how I feel about people. (I have no hexagrams on the solar plexus). When I do explain things. It comes with a highly measured, philosophical bent. One that most people probably wouldn't guess at.

Gate 37 is on the emotional centre. It does not follow the practised logic of many of the other centres. 

So if a person were to have that catalyst. And a woman. Then it would provide the catalyst of having their inner viewpoints. Deeply held ones. Like that the female perspective is more prized by the Creator than the male perspective. This would manifest in the world and would receive pushback. It would potentially receive consequence. So then that's when that deeply held belief could be evaluated. 

Imagine the power of a powerful consequence arriving in life from these thoughts and behaviours! Like being strategically challenged over the long term by an intelligent person in the real world. Imagine how difficult it would be to challenge this incredibly subtle emotional preference in a higher density! Where everyone is blissed out and the idea of rejecting love to learn a lesson is the most unthinkable heresy, or a concept that cannot be articulated. Cannot be thought at all. 

I imagine this is a fairly strong lesson in the world today.  

Conclusion.

I do have other interesting lines. Line 18.5. Line 47.6. But I think that is enough for now. I am not sure if I will write another post with interesting lines or if I will talk a bit more about my own chart and finish this small series.

For me, one of the overall points I am trying to make though is that these hexagrams, these parts of the human design, they show that the difficulties we have with others are sometimes part of Gods plan. There are even more outrageous hexagrams in the human design. There is a hexagram where a person never takes responsibility and always blames others (4.5).

Where this brings us to real spiritual evolution. I believe. Is that to accept these things. Acceptance is hugely important. It is one of the most important things for the service to others in the Law of One. To see something as dysfunctional as some of these things and to understand its place. To not rail against it. Well, that is a positive I believe! 

Just a small note. This was not intentional. But we can see quite a clear delineation here with Power, in the 13.2. Wisdom in the 22.2. And Love, in the 37.5. 

The perfection including dysfunction as found in the human design. (Part 1).

My last blog was kind of intense. It felt like it gave me a kind of grounding to acknowledge everything that was said in that post. I will address it at the end of this blog;

This is todays video:

Youtube: Dharma Science Radio: Bearing My Cross - Healthy Masculinity Through Human Design: 13th of January 2025:

https://youtu.be/356wKlFJKg4?si=mhd1HGvd_2wtQWTR

I might need to go back over this video. Even though I have listened to the entire thing. And not posted here until I had done so. I cannot massively recall everything said. The wisdom of the human design is not drawn together into a central structure always. You are not fed the macro picture and meaning like you are in philosophy (something I am really enjoying recently!) A lot of it is 'this is all this profound information on the nature and minutea of what is'. Now go put it together.

But Human Design doesn't like you using the mind too much. So put it together without using your mind! That's a joke. (But told by whom?)

I do recall though, probably everything I need. The video starts off with him reading his own chart and talks about how he experiences his not self. The undefined centres in a chart really get played by the world a bit when the person does not have their awareness. This is interesting to perhaps later understand my own undefined centres. 

As I have said before. I do not completely connect with the idea of the not self. I prefer to look at the chart as to how this or that problem plays it. The not self is "too vague". But maybe some value can be extracted from it. 

Anyway, a thing that comes up again and again when he is talking about the chart is all the lines where something is shown as less than ideal if you read it out. But once it plays out in the life it makes absolute, total sense. 

Human Design Profundity.

For me, this is a really profound part of the human design. It is one of the more profound facts I know about anything. Because so many of these lines explain things that I have so many problems with. Some of these lines are... tragic. 

I still do believe there is something that 'goes wrong' in charts that you can see sometimes - which I have only seen in the most dysfunctional people. This is when you can see a pattern kind of planned by the universe that didn't happen. But there is unquestionably a side that feels nasty, dysfunctional or confusing sometimes. Something that contradicts how you think the world should work. And it is RIGHT THERE in the chart. 

I will explain a few of those lines in my own chart. Then I will go into a few that I have observed in the world. Then I will go into a part of my chart that might have related to that previous blog post. 

Three right facing arrows in my chart. 

Anyway, 

Gate 21.2 (exaltation): 

Might is right: The legitimacy of action in response to flagrant and persistent interference. Powerful and extreme reaction. Here, the severest action will be the most successful. The legitimate rejection of interference on the material plane. 

Backed up also by 7.1 

This makes me sound like a really hard person willing to walk over other people. Maybe that's true in a sense, I do not know. As I have not had the opportunity to express that part of myself. I haven't been given "political power", so to speak. But the way it manifests with me in my estimation is that I push to create music. When you create music. It is very anti politically correct. Because you don't have that much control over what comes out. "I have the right to resent you" was one of my recent songs. And in the past, they have been very dark. 

Sometimes though, they are not dark. But you think they will be dark before you write them. Sometimes they have creepy ancient metaphors in them, towers and demonic priests. But like I said, sometimes they are just horrible. Saying exactly all the angry (but true and justified) feelings you feel and in order to make music. This line I feel, allows me to push into that. It allows me to push into music creation where denying this, suppressing it in any way. Would just completely stop the music at all. 

Gate 45.4 (detriment)

Direction: The tendency to try to influence the direction of a group for personal benefit. The lack of expression of higher principles on the material plane. 

Also I think, linked strongly with 4.1. (Which is a kind of skeptical thinking)

This, doesn't completely sound like me does it? But also, in some other way, it sounds very like me. My blog is very spiritual. It does not sound like I am lacking higher principles. But at the same time. There is definitely a side of me that does that. There is a very grounded element that is kind of skeptical and selfish.

This is perhaps because there are two channels into the throat. The 11-56 IS very spiritual. This is probably where all the Law of One, and a good part of the Human Design stuff is happening. The 21-45, here focusing on the 45 is carrying a different message. 

It combines with the 4.1. to create a focus on the real world. In a very practical and economic/ political and philosophical kind of way (as in philosophy like Ayn Rand that leans right). Here, there is no expression of the ego wanting to help the other in any way. It is about having clarity in how to deal with the world and others and recognising it as a selfish place often. It brings a level of reality to an otherwise very cerebral chart. 

Gate 51.1 (detriment, twice):

Reference: The advantage of previous crisis experience. A tendency to withdraw after a shock. The weakness of the ego in times of challenge.

One of these is my unconscious Venus, the other is unconscious Jupiter. 

This is at the point where I decide this is part 1. All the other things I wanted to say are going to go into additional articles. I am exhausted.  

Venus tends to be how we experience relationships with others. So people generally experience this from me. Jupiter is kind of like a spiritual message. Although, there is less of a "spiritual" element to the body/ unconscious/ red part of the design. 

What could possibly be good about this? A position that traumatises a person. 

Well, Ra Uru Hu had a lot of positive things to say about this line. For me, I would say it is not so much about the line. But it's position on my chart. 

The energy flow in my chart starts at the 44, moves to the 26. This is about getting background information into how humanity operates. Since these are outer planets. It is all incredibly deep and only ever semi conscious. 

From that base. There is the way I face the world. The 21-45. The manifestor part and what people see when I am in a good place and they are "impacted" by me. The moving of a pure energy into the world that 'orders' things. And that the world resists.

But there is also the Projector part (because the G- self doesn't have a route to the throat). That starts from the gate 51.1. This carries, pretty much every time I have been socially ostracised or bullied in some other way. It carries my interaction with groups (Jupiter). It has become a basis for what the G- self then experiences. 

Everyone who doesn't want to hear the truth of the 51.1 as expressed from the 25.6. Will inevitably ostracise the person with the channel. And we will see where this gets them long term.  

All of the Philosophy I have gained. All of the Law of One stuff that is heart chakra based. Is included in the G- self. The philosophy that among other concepts. Relies on Universalism. Which is a big part of the G- self.  

The G Self is generally a soft and positive centre. But the 21-45 is not such a nice feel. It sets up the chart potentially, of someone that can understand and express in pretty harsh terms the nature of a transactional relationship. But runs all of these kinds of interactions past a strong set of values that are only ever understood if they are known as a person. 

Conclusion for part 1.

This blog post has started to take on a life of its own so I will reign it in for the moment. I do intend to continue focusing on the idea that someone has a line that sounds generally crazy but that this all comes together with the amazingness of life as it is.

Reflections on Master and Slave Morality.

I have found that Nietzsche's ideas of master and slave morality, and resentment. Have been extremely useful in my life. Suddenly these are powerfully useful. 

Perhaps, but not definitely. Because Nietzsche's chart and my chart interacts with illness in the same way. With problems in the body, the lower chakras are effectively switched off, and the defined Ajna goes into overdrive. Making the person into a kind of makeshift projector. Who experiences a desire to want their knowledge to be valued and to gain power that way. But without the spiritual connection of a real Projector. Who receives an invitation and doesn't have pure energy centres into the throat, or a defined sacral, getting in the way of their information processing.

The 'makeshift projector'. The needs of the Projector without the circuitry; I hypothesize leads to a kind of powerless resentment.  

I am actually reading Nietzsche's work itself. I am never fully convinced a retelling of a persons philosophies is definitely accurate. I remember reading Adam Smith (the original 'free market' thinker) and Karl Marx originals in University and the passages I read seemed to diverge wildly from their reputations. Adam Smith was talking about quite strong regulations he would like to put in against banks. Even though what is said about philosophers work has been poured over by very intelligent people. There is a lot I can get from their actual writings. I hope to get through Nietzsche, Simone Weil and Kierkegaard. That is just the start. 

Resentment.

This is my chart. This is relevant to the theme of 'resentment' because the "cure" for that for me seems to partly be the 21-45.

The catalyst I sometimes face, one that annoys me and one that I do not get when I pray (I think this is important and I do assign this catalyst to a temptation or negative place). One that just sucks the life out of me is women in some fashion. A few weeks ago it was a very married looking blonde with massive cans that seemed to want to talk. And today, it was a younger girl, although I did not see her face, who sat right close to me and then when the 'event' we were at ended just walked away quickly. Not giving me the opportunity to so much as smile at her.  

With the lack of attractive women and sexual opportunities in my life. With the utter uphill battle this would be if I were to ever pursue this seriously. (Need to lose weight and a lot more, I would need, in truth, pretty astounding good luck!) These are really uncomfortable experiences. Men are designed to orbit women in a way. Every bit of energy a man puts into self improvement, the muscles are to protect woemn and look attractive to women. This is why mens self help doesn't include so many statements of self worth. Because women are to judge that, and they do so very arbitrarily. Men orbit women, put them 'in the kitchen' so to speak. Look after them and women orbit the children they have. Even though that is not precisely how it always goes in the modern world. That is a big part of how we are evolutionarily adapted to relate. 

I have a difficult past in this area. A fertile opportunity to 'resentment'. As a lot of people apparently do. The problem with having any kind of difficulty with women as a guy is that women are an untouchable class that cannot be criticised (outside of the manosphere of course). Out of five of my main jobs. Two of those I was viciously and deliberately socially excluded by women. To the extent that every other person at the place socialised and I was exclusively not invited - for years on end in both cases. The remaining jobs were... three, "all male" (my favourite job, even though it was low status). Four, immigrants, where I didn't talk to anyone because people barely knew English (I also liked this one, for about half the time I was there). And lastly, a very female environment where management didn't like me. So the same kind of thing in reference to exclusion, I was deliberately treated worse than everyone else there in proveable and obvious ways, but the women on the ground floor didn't have anything against me. 

Outside of that is not much better. In my regular life. Not much better. No female friendships. I did have one that killed herself (a few months after our friendship ended. It would not look good if this had been during our friendship!) Most women in my personal life that I could have potentially socialised with have responded with condescension and made very clear that this was not something they wanted. 

I have also, practically, aged out of where these social situations are likely and that I have the energy for them. The women at one of the jobs where I was socially excluded the worst, with deliberate cruelty, will never get any particular consequence for how they behaved towards me. 

There is a strong 'diffusion of responsibility' as to how women behave. A single instance of crappy behaviour is often... Quite understandable. Not even crappy by strict definitions. The girl I saw today that moved on and didn't want to talk to me. Is completely her right. There is nothing really off about that. But add these things up over a long period of time and it starts to feel like some sort of response is necessary. Or even if it is not possible due to a position of powerlessness. I have no power to respond to these women. It is worth noting, just simply to validate my own emotions. That to be able to respond would be positive. 

A woman not responding to a personal message on its own is not a big deal. But when you add it to a long list it becomes generalised. For instance, in the below tweet. This seems like a reasonable reaction to circumstance, correct? But the subtext here is that if a man is in a position of low status. And lower status men are obviously less likely to have girlfriends than high status men (and she would relate to a man who was in her friendgroup due to being one of her girlfriends boyfriends! Or a high status boss she had to relate to.) So in practice, this means that her, and the women she discusses it as being a universal principle. Have a more negative attitude, and one that is carried out in the real world, towards men of low status.  

Which we know from experience. But even pointing this obvious thing out gets people upset. 

I also, as a general principle. Do not owe women anything collectively if they have not given me anything collectively (including respect). This is not so important for me because as someone that has a chronic health condition, it is unlikely I would be well enough to defend a woman if she was targeted to be beaten or raped. But I can understand how other men do not have that responsibility either. 

Ah, I am quite proud of this chain of reasoning. It is a difficult thing to articulate often!  

Slave morality.

This, what I have said, is what I have to work with. This is my past experience with women. The raw material I have to draw conclusions from. I do have a very positive relationship with my mother though, and that is arguably a more important relationship than any I have just referenced. 

I mentioned previously how the worst sides of myself seem to be drawn out by doing energy work on myself. There is nothing good about this. I wrote down in my journal when the feeling was fresh a huge amount of things that showed how everything was going wrong. I could write an article with this information and with any connected research at a later date. These are the signs when someone is on or off their spiritual path. 

One thing I noticed is that I was able to carry out the appearance of doing the things I normally do. But without the attendance usefulness. An example. I started reading philosophy a bit more in this energy healing time. But I actually USE philosophy way more when I am my real self. I have found that thinking isn't really exclusively cerebral. The reason I am motivated to write this blog is a feeling. I feel passionate and powerful relevance to Nietzsche's concept of Master and Slave morality. The impulse to work out if his ideas on life constituted a "meaning of life" as he, and other philosophers, say it does. 

The reading of philosophy detached from that is just an "isn't this interesting", and I suppose "aren't I clever for knowing this?" 

A similar thing went for music. In the 'slave morality' frame of the energy work. I was thinking a lot about writing fiction stories and when I played, it was coming together almost like classical guitar. But once I was into my 'real self'. I feel passionately engaged with music and have no instinct to play less then presently. I was back to scales and loving blues music. The previous classical music kind of meandering was quickly gone. 

The resentments of the above though, is why I mentioned, in this article about Nietzsche's views. All of that on women. The experience earlier today, though it was short lived. Pushed me straight into "slave morality" and the anger at feeling low status and having women... make that case... subtly of course; and with endless plausible deniability. 

This is all completely real information. These are legitimate grievances, built on a solid foundation of reasoning as stated. But they still completely disappear in a more healthy state.

Master Morality.

I don't know whether I really like a term as 'Grandiose' as 'Master Morality'. But there is a clear opposition to that slave morality mindset. That is what I am talking about here. 

The other day, when flipping out of the feeling from the energy work. During the energy work or 'slave morality' mindset. I had made a long, very sensitive comment on a human design youtube video. It was to a guy actually. This had clear 'Makeshift Projector' energy to it. I reasoned out why his video was good and added some of my own insights onto his chart. I also felt generally annoyed that I probably wasn't going to get a response. 

But then when I slipped into my 'real self'. Stopped the energy work and did more exercise. I could not believe that I had bothered with something so irrelevant. I deleted the comment. I was no longer interested in it, and I would no longer say what I had said. The comment was 'alien' to me in a sense. I would not comment on his chart. That is obviously not a good thing to do and not something I care about. If he has his own answer as to why something is. It is his own answer. 

In the 'Makeshift Projector' place, I get upset with so called bad treatment and hope I can get back at everyone somehow. In my real state, or my master morality. There is nothing I care about less. I simply do not care about these people. I feel great about the gym, the Law of One and other things, and that's all I need. 

It is an irony. That in order for me to not be petty. In order for me to NOT care about revenge. I have to be far MORE ruthless, not less. 

The process after having the girl sit next to me from earlier was as follows. I went home and tried to reason myself out of it. Mildly effective. I read the Law of One. Massively effective. I prayed, and I consider that catalyst a good one to make sure I am praying in the morning and not running into those sorts of women. 

And finally, after the prayer. I wondered if I could take any of these emotions and make great music out of them. Like plugging lyrics into this kind of song:

Youtube: Red Grey Matter: Eva Carboni: July 6th 2019:

https://youtu.be/BBP0B0hVXUk?si=uUEwG5jnCKMJnBho

An interesting point. The singer this channel is aggressively promoting at the moment. Is AI! Had me fooled for a while!

You can imagine a good song being able to be made out of these kinds of emotions. All of that longing and such.

Anyway, that's all I've got for the moment! 

Gen Z, societal change.

Todays video: Psychology with Dr Ana: Does Gen Z have a puritanical problem?: Video created on: October 7th 2026:

https://youtu.be/UguB2U7EHdo?si=RjsK5k2p3mAkzsqx

I also want to talk about this general theme. It is important I think. I do believe in a Q narrative. I do believe that the world we are told exists in the Law of One, the one with Extra terrestrials and a bunch of other stuff. Does exist. 

This... changes things a little bit. Socially and philosophically. My idea of what the future is going to be impacts on my philosophy and because I do believe what I do. In the event of a Q narrative I DO believe people who have behaved a certain way all their life will suddenly change. I do believe that events can bring down pressure that is strong enough to completely change how people relate to the world. 

Real world thoughts:

So on that video from Dr Ana. I think this is a very important thing to realise in order to "keep your ear to the ground" in a sense. 

Gen Z are far more puritanical than previous generations. There are many, many things that I think might influence this. I think it is worth reflecting on the experience of these younger generations because me, as an mid to older millennial. Really stopped thinking about how people construct the world after I left that period in my life. But it is an important thing to know. I had never really considered how things like social media might effect youngsters now:

Based on what Dr Ana has said. That Gen Z are more puritanical. She specifically related this to "woke" culture. But it seems to me it would be on both sides. Gen Z women are trending hard left and Gen Z men are trending hard right. Gen Z, in general, are not drinking alcohol. Both sides in general are puritanical. Since liberals have the woke era and Communist style thought policing. Young men have Conservative attitudes.  

These are some of the reasons I think this could be. This is not going to be specifically to puritanism. Although it will focus on it. It will also be to the general issues the generation faces.

A) The introduction of politics to a generation far too young.

In the UK, in 2016. Brexit in the UK, and Trump in the US, was advertised. Pushed by the left primarily. Onto very young people. This was about my introduction to real politics. I had already done most of a politics degree. But had still not engaged in it seriously. Perhaps because my psychology didn't lend itself to leftist indoctrination the University professors were trying to push. 

it is a cold thing politics. Any real exploration of it is the study of clandestined creepy groups and all sorts of criminal things. it is the study of manipulation and how many innocent people can be manipulated. It is the study of utter focus on power and utter selfishness. 

I spent my college years blissfully unaware of politics. But at that age. I did have the fanaticism that comes with an undeveloped moral world view. One that has not experience or detachment and thinks everything is super important. One that considers its view correct because it cannot perceive the virtue outside of it often. 

For me, I think that being engaged with politics, and all its poison. Would have seriously messed up my life. But nowadays, Gen Z, many of which were born in the 2000's. Making them 16 when these events happened. They have been radicalised. 

B) The introduction of social media:

Ana mentioned this in her video. When I was young, there was a lot of freedom. There was a lot of excitement and if you went out clubbing. You danced. We did not have smartphones. Facebook really started up when I was perhaps 17.

Gen Z have had the camera on them all of their lives thus far. As young as 10 pretty much everything has been captured. The constant fear creates a communist esque perfectionism most likely.

C) The 2008 crash. 

I used to ask people a lot what their plans were in life. Their ambitions. I often got good responses from this. People were always excited about something and appreciated being asked. But a few years after 2008 (Like, roughly 2010 when women and men are recorded as politically diverging wildly). I noticed peoples ambitions had been crushed and the question brought up sullen resistance, so I stopped asking. 

D) The rampant discrimination of the left and its effect on masculinity.

One of the things that I am convinced makes life worth living is masculine passion. Women like it as well. They may say they do not and that this or that man is "arrogant" or whatever. But they are excited with it. It is also how innovation happens and how a society moves forward technologically.

For a long time now, and the left, having really won this part of the culture war. The left have been waging a war on masculinity. Everything is 'toxic'. There was 'metoo'. And there is diversity hiring making sure white man cannot get jobs. 

This has a chilling and long term sociological effect. Men do not fantasize about having a better life. Those fantasies do not involve women (who are often so feminist and resentful they would seem to not want to be involved anyway). So obviously this can lead to a chilling and puritanism. 

Also because, the millennials, in a sense. Learned from their Boomer parents. The joys of taking life easy. This was kind of a wisdom that was not shared since they had not status with which to bring Gen Z along with them! 

E) The degeneracy of millennials.

Millennials. Are really quite intense. There really is a lot of drugs going around. I remember a woman telling me she had never gone for a night out and not been offered cocaine. Weed, and way, way stronger things, are huge. I have heard of the most debauched parties. I have also heard Gen Z people reflect this attitude to me. Notably with the vaccine they found it hypocritical for Millennials say that they did not want to put one in their body when Gen Z don't believe Millennials are that discriminating in other parts of their lives.

F) The weirdness of Gen X.

There is a lot of stuff said about Boomers. I have mostly seen the positive side of Boomers to be fair. There is a certain ability to be able to handle life if you have a good grip on hedonism. I have found Gen X to be neurotic and Nihilistic (When I see them on X, they are always showing off about their Nihilism!). I haven't engaged with them a lot and do not know a lot about them in general. But I think it's worth mentioning. 

The coming shift.

I had way more 'substance' to go into this article. I was thinking recently how hell for leather a 25 year old fitness influencer is that I follow. But I think these points capture enough of what I am trying to say. 

I showed at the beginning a tweet from someone that talks about the supposed coming 'shift'. That, as I also mentioned. Does make sense to me. 

I was reading the Crucifixion of Esmerelda Sweetwater the other day. It's kind of a prequel to the Law of One. A fictional story that discusses a lot of the concepts the Law of One also does. I realised, after reading it, (it focuses a lot on how the negative twists spiritual laws in order to operate). I realised that I have an assumption within myself that I can save people more than I can. Yes, having someone like me nearby with any societal change. Someone that they trust and lives in the real world with them. But also, that is knowledgeable about these entire areas. That is good. 

But you cannot really protect someone from the impact, the societal revealing of absolute horror that this kind of political change will bring. In a way, that book, the Crucifixion of Esmerelda Sweetwater. It describes the process that a lot of people have gone through in order to take on societal beliefs. Their own free will was used against them. It was slow, cunning and powerful. But it trapped that being within it. 

The breaking of that will be traumatising. The societal effects have been massive to create Gen Z as they currently are and I wonder how much they will change if this were to all go down. 

Addendum last article. Healing.

I recall right before I had my 'schizophrenic break'. A lead in was being very confused about who I was. Am I fifth density or sixth density? Was the issue at the time. 

The intensity of learning that wisdom has not come again. The eventual result of that contemplation was very, very powerful wisdom. But sometimes I still experience a lot of discomfort in "Is it this way or that way". That might be what is happening here. Many times I have thought I should do healing and then gone back on it. Maybe I will again try and figure this out. 

Energy healing, and whether I should do it. Has been one of those things. As a person who is ill. Healing is very important to me. As a person who is spiritual and religious. There is at least a little faith that higher, positive spiritual worlds and things exist. 

I think this is a subject that is also of interest to other people. A lot of people do things like Reiki and/ or, they commit to spiritual ideas in general and believe that world exists. This is meaningful to people. Christians believe, at least in theory I suppose. That healing is possible. Since Jesus told his disciples to heal others (and cast out demons). And a lot of people have various illnesses.

The basic reality.

A few days ago though I had an insight. The energy healing I have been doing before which got a bad result. Maybe I was doing the technique wrong? Maybe I need to actually touch my body while I do it. Like, start with holding my feet etc.

So I did that. It seemed to work. I, all of a sudden had a lot more energy and a kind of 'natural' feeling of 'oneness'. A feeling of general profundity. A connection with plants.

I got very intense dreams as well (a very good sign! Or so I thought) and I slept a lot. But also, I got a lack of joy. Which I attributed to... maybe the effects of discipline. Whatever I am doing is obviously not working. So my body perhaps needs discipline to do things slightly differently? Watch less TV. Read more philosophy etc.

A few days of this though. And I started to realise I am experiencing no joy. One of the reasons, is that I am sleeping a lot. I theorised when this happened that I am sleeping deeply and healing something. But there is no positive feeling associated with this. The dreams at first seemed profound. But as it went on. A dream I had tonight. Was unpleasant in a sexual manner. Not fetishtic and fun. But kind of demonic.

It also means that I don't have the energy to get to the gym. The gym is one of the things I legitimately just absolutely love. It also provides a lot of my healing in the... real sense I suppose. I know that a lot of the problems I have. Both physical and emotional. Are helped massively by the gym. 

But what of the healing? The energy healing. Is it not meant to work for anyone and... just work in general? I have been thinking about that. I have felt a lot of positive help since doing this. I thought it might be them being happy I am on the right path. But as I have come to the conclusion I am NOT meant to be doing energy healing. I have thought of it a bit more clearly.

In one of the sessions. I can't remember when exactly. And I am not going to search it. But I am making a proper read through at the moment (with copious notes. Almost every question) so will have most of that kind of stuff committed to memory soon. 

The Law of One stated that some healers are using yellow ray energy to do the healing rather than green ray energy. Yellow is will power. This is not apparently a good energy. It is not 'of the Creator'. It is of the individual person. Green is where you want to be if you want the energy channeled from the Creator. Which is what healing really is. 

I... have no love for healing. It is purely something I am doing out of need and frustration at my medical condition. I can definitely understand that the small amounts of positive effects I did have. But without any connected warmth or joy in my life. Could easily have come from yellow ray healing. That sounds like it would completely fit. 

And at least I have an answer!

Another thing that is slightly connected that I have been thinking over. The way my path went was that it was originally very metaphysical. David Wilcock and the Law of One. And later, after being excessively mystical was not serving me. I went over to Stefan Molyneux for a long time. About a decade. 

Stefans attitude, and what he would label as the attitude of philosophy in general. Is that it is best to make decisions based on logic and objective evidence. Not mystical beliefs. I used to believe that if I ate chocolate there was a 'mystical' reason it always went wrong. But just now I have questioned that. I have had a few bad times with chocolate including last time I had it before the gym, I strained myself, the caffeine stimulation lead to overexertion and couldn't go back for two weeks. 

But that isn't like... a reason to never have chocolate. It is a kind of mystical thinking I suppose. That there is some sort of curse that says I can't have chocolate. Always a different problem. Whereas, maybe it isn't always a different problem related to a curse. Maybe it is just a few different annoying problems have come up. Which I can avoid. By say, not having it just before exercise! 

In the sense. It is very much my "path" it feels to me to work with things due to objective evidence and logic and such. 

I do use a pyramid sometimes and do find that useful genuinely. But this is me theorising why, I don't think I should be doing energy work on myself.