Wanted to write this article yesterday, but it is only after going for a walk, 9:30 - 17:00 with a one hour break. With a very heavy rucksack after the supermarket. That I feel clear and grounded enough to do it. I did almost a full work day of walking:
So this is the video concept I wanted to talk about. Human design motivation. I chose to excerpt Need here because it is my own motivation. But she has done all six of them. This was the best videos I found on motivation. Human Design remains very stubbornly subjective. There isn't a way, it feels like, in a lot of human design, to get more technical rundowns:
The Blonde Priestess: Phoenix Diaries day 124 Week 18- Human Design Motivation NEED:
https://youtu.be/33lHeUF26cw?si=QNLXGjRKk1u-_RXa
Motivation in my life:
I have very little to base motivation on. It is mostly close friends I have known for decades that did actually have their birth times. I have not ever read peoples charts in general. Like, done readings. So I can't talk about it from a position of having a lot to go off.
So it is generally just general thoughts I have to go off.
One of the first insights I got on motivation was from a twitter handle @ iJaadee saying that whenever she has made a decision that has been a big deal. That has worked out. It has always been accompanied with a lot of fear. Decisions that seemed right that weren't accompanied with said fear were not so powerful and generally didn't work out.
As someone with Fear transference, my motivation being need. This is pretty much the opposite for me. Yesterday, there was a confusion with the doctor. I received a text that was sent in error meaning I thought I was going to have trouble with the medication and the doctor. It kept me completely unproductive the whole night.
This is fear as transference to need. I need something. If I can't get it I experience fear. The fear of having my survival threatened.
Other insights:
But I'm just going to go around a few people I have known and make a central point about motivation. One of the things I have noticed about motivation. Which might echo the original benefits I got, but are now largely forgotten, about strategy. Is that it has settled my annoyance at others behaviours that I think of to myself as being potentially not self or negative.
For instance. I have had two childhood friends in my life. Two men. That are really big on going after women and one night stands and things. Something I mostly feel is a waste of time and a distraction from actually improving ones life. There is no negotiation here. They will ditch long term friendships over this. But, I looked up their motivation, and what did I see?: Desire!
I also knew a woman with guilt motivation. A very tortured soul. She was not someone I think was doing her strategy properly, owing to her eventual end jumping off a cliff. But I always noted, she had been an extremely powerful person when she was young due to her beauty. That was over and above that of even the average young girl. She had the body of Victoria Pfeiffer and was probably just a little MORE facially attractive if that is possible.
It was subtle. She was mostly positive and more humble than a lot of women I have known. But there was an unmistakeable arrogance that I don't think she realised. A certain refusal to commit herself to objective reality. A certain belief in her own superiority in some ways, that I believe comes from guys not being honest with a woman so they can sleep with her, and that happening a LOT. Her entire teens and twenties being built on that in a very fundamental way that had never been questioned.
Had she relinquished that, and accepted the guilt that was obviously there but, she would never admit to about certain things, about misusing power. Then I think it would be a beautiful thing. That kind of humility from a beautiful women that had now aged out a bit.
I think we automatically on some level known what others need, through our connection with the creator, and we reflexively imagine these things sometimes. Other times though some model of how we are viewing the world gets in the way.
The last example is my half sister. That feels shallow and infuriating at times. Innocence motivation. For me, knowing that she is meant to be like that is a huge benefit. It really helps in accepting her as she is. It is kind of priceless in that way. I feel a strong need to rail against her to make sure she doesn't make self destructive decisions she will later regret.
I remember saying to my sister once that I loved going to the gym because it got rid of a deep and powerful sense of anger I feel. She said yes that's true. I said to her 'you have never experienced that in your entire life have you?'. She laughed and asked me how I knew. I said that way she had responded, which was like a very casual 'Yah'. She laughed.
And deeper on motivation:
I have not yet mentioned my own motivation... 'Need'. I can't easily articulate it. But one of the things I notice in general with motivation. Is that it can sometimes validate a part of ourselves that seems quite negative in a way. Like a nuisance. In the examples I gave. All of them came with a judgement that they were somehow improper. Desire and Innocence examples is that I feel frustrated in the motivation of another person. The guilt and need motivation is that the person themselves feels that the motivation is somehow improper.
The desire motivation example fits very well with the two guys. Especially when they are successful with it. Need motivation however, is not such an easy fit with a masculine identity.
I have wondered to myself a bit. With a need motivation is it a legitimate thing for someone to say they 'need' sex? My sex drive is much reduced for medical reasons, and I can say that I don't need sex. But I have had the desire for female 'cute partyness' sort of stuff. I recall waiting at a bus stop after work, an attractive blonde girl walked past, she was in a group of about five girls and two guys and was saying something fun. I looked in her general direction feeling that sense of need, and she looked back, and it seemed very much that she just knew what I was feeling and was sympathetic.
The only other person with a need motivation that I can mention is David Wilcock. Who is a con artist. But is a very spiritual person with the same tendencies towards spirituality as I have. I remember seeing something from Ra Uru Hu about which kind of spirituality each motivation correlates to and need was correlated to 'Gods'. It feels like you go to 'God' with need motivation, because there is no force on earth that can satisfy a near infinite and constant need.
I also feel that need in general gives me a kind of charm. That charm is lacking when I am not worked out and it becomes an exercise of approaching someone in a bit of a mad way. But when I have figured things out. The general background of needing something means that you know how to talk to people to get that thing. People often reflexively smile when I talk to them. People like to be asked for something that they can indeed provide. It makes them feel virtuous, useful, like there is a connection, and we are beings designed for service to others.
There is a lot more I have discovered. Such as falsely satisfying a need, and how unproductive that can be. It is better sometimes for me to not solve an issue with a way that is not for me, and to then accept a strong sense of 'need' to propel my actions forward, because said issue is unsolved and 'needs' to be solved another way.
It also means that I have a good grip of what others need. The girl I mentioned earlier with the guilt motivation. I talked to her every day. I messaged her and softly nagged her. I knew she needed that. She was deeply lonely living alone and working remote. But she would never acknowledge that, she would pursue other things, and it was only after she had left my life for six weeks that she jumped.
Conclusion.
This has been an uncomfortably disjointed and unstructured. This is because, I think, as I said at the beginning, it is very subjective. It is hard to come up with any information on motivation in general. Not many human design people have articulated much on it. It remains a part of the largely unconquered territory of the design. Something still to be talked about and worked through.
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