Changing life.

I have opened pages two times previously to say something today and both times closed it. I don't normally do that the "message" usually just comes straight out.

But I do want to say something. Even so this specific entry is not going to be as well articulated as the last set of posts most likely.

Psychologically, in relation to the 'great journey'. I feel I have made progress. I am thinking more and more that those that are in line with their conscience are those that eventually earn a bit of a psychological change. Perhaps better handling of stress from an insight or something. The reason people change so frequently is that this is a lot of work. Even the smallest of vices might throw it off. So that's why few people achieve it. 

I'm not quite confident enough to talk about the 'lessons' that I have seemed to have learnt. The useable insights I have had. But I do hope to eventually. 

At least not in relation to my most current understanding. But the entire theme echoes something I previously talked about. I have had a great desire to do energy work, as a healer type of thing. Like Jesus. But again and again I have rediscovered that it is simply not for me and that it is so not for me, that it has linked with something that I have also rediscovered. Sometimes, there is something in life that practically, on a mental level, you see as only good. But in real terms you have to get it out of your life. 

I went back to doing energy work for a few months. The same problems come up periodically. It gives me a great deal of strange passive anger. It strangles my actual self. There are always two sides, two perspectives I can take towards life. One is healing, and another is a kind of determination that produces real results. Real lasting results. It changes my dream perspective. There are a lot of benefits. 

So I am doing things in real life along these lines. Waiting for the change, watching for the change. Perhaps that change will deliver more ideas for output and such and life improvement. I will see how it goes.