Shock.

I am in kind of a state of exhaustion at the moment. The eye problem I have. It is solved now. Just some remaining medication. But I was extremely afraid that it was going to get worse.  There was a possibility it would need surgery. 

It has brought an unbelievable benefit. This turn of events. One of them very meaningful. A few of them very important but more cosmetic. Regardless, I did not even know I was as stressed as I apparently was about this. I only collapsed energy wise after my last eye appointment. 

This is just an fyi in case I do not update this blog for a while. I might update like. Tomorrow. But I don't think I will. Prediction is never easy, but if I were to have not updated for a week or more I would probably preferred to have done so.  

Human Design heavy post.

Ah, exciting times. From tomorrow. I will have turned a huge corner in my health. I will have been able to come off caffeine and other health issues will be partially solved most likely as well. This will be a good day for me. 

Today though, I wanted to reflect a little on the human design chart. The human design chart is a very subtle creature. All of these transits I am going to discuss are abstract 'maybe' things. But I wanted to push ahead in my understanding of the chart. In my use of the chart. To do that the first place I wanted to start off was to read up on the transit positions and see how they are effecting me. This may lead to being able to predict what movements will mean in the future:

Firstly, Uranus, going back from gate 20 to gate 8 on November 5th. Stations at gate 8.4 on February 4th 2026 and goes back into gate 20 on April 28th 2026.

Uranus' transit through gate 8 has been hugely impactful for me. I theorised that a big part of my not self was in gate 8. Bridging the 1-8 channel which I have the hanging 1. It has been a huge layered insight into where things went wrong and my place in the world. It also effects a big part of my life and that is... this part of my life. My understanding is that the previous conditioning in gate 8 meant that I started to see myself as a spiritual messenger of sorts. But I am not that.

I do not have anything in the gate 20 or on the entire integration channel. Previously, I thought that perhaps since everyone I know, and more grounded people, has one thing or a lot in the integration channel. Every single person. Perhaps this placement will effect everyone but me. As it is now transiting gate 20.1 I am seeing a pattern I can only just grip. About how Uranus is doing what it always does, and that is in a very hands on way fights the good/ evil battle on our planet. 

But gate 8 is more relevant to me hitting my 1st hexagram. I have been kind of left in limbo recently. The youtube channel is kind of winding down. My last four videos had one view between them. It does feel as though Uranus has gone through the gate 8. Deposited that information then kind of left me hanging as it chills in gate 20. But I hope to have some clarity in this area as Uranus does go back and transit the gate 8. 

These things should link. My understanding is the theme of the transit does link. Even if it decades apart. So the theme of gate 8 should move onto gate 20. But I will not go into depth in how I think that is happening.  

Saturn. Recently, I think two days ago or so, has gone from gate 36.5 to gate 36.4. Gate 36.5 is about having confidence one will be able to handle crisis. Gate 36.4 is about gaining allies, probably in secret, to handle said crisis.

I have suddenly picked up QAnon stuff recently. As more has slowly seeped through the twitter. Some relevant points. Today was quite a big event in British politics and that whole area does all of a sudden seem to be moving. Trump has stopped funding Ukraine. This energy has suddenly entered my life again, whereas I was a bit tuned out to it when Saturn was in gate 36.5. I do not have anything on the emotional centre or the gate 35, so this is another transit that I generally don't expect to effect me much. 

Neptune. Moved about a week ago from gate 25.3 to 25.2. I relate both the gate 25 and Neptune separately, to philosophy. I have been going through Stefan Molyneux's material lately and kind of opposing within myself his viewpoint. He is fairly atheistic in his outlook. This fits the gate 25.3 that says that the recognition that innocent action does not in itself guarantee success. This kind of fits to me. I am the innocent action here. I am the one with the new age beliefs. 

I actually talked to Stefan Molyneux recently. It feels like, something that was on a bucket list I was not aware of has been ticked off. It is just amazing to have spoken to him. As part of this, for no logical reason, perhaps as the material of his I am listening to has moved on as well. I have just been more accepting of his perspective and do not argue against it when I listen to him anymore. This is in line with 25.2: "Devotion and Dedication to the now."  

All of this, as you might have noticed is kind of thin. There are additional points I realise that I will not go into. I have had an insight into a limitation I have (Pluto in gate 60). As that entire channel (60-3), is now defined. 

It is two things. It is on one side. Very powerful and very interesting. On the other though, it is the opposite of that. It is not powerful because it can't be stapled down to an expression in 'objective' reality. It is not interesting because it remains strictly person and doesn't have any power.  

I have previously wondered about certain transits in relation to political events and sometimes, such as the events with Iran and Israel during the period when Neptune and Pluto crossed into new hexagrams briefly in April 2024. Sometimes I have been pretty much right. But most of the time there isn't anything that can be communicated to others. It's all just super subtle like the information I have laid out.  

Science fiction stories.

I just tried to have this discussion with someone in my real life and they started talking with me about it then completely ignored me. They were doing something else at the same time.

Being disabled, unemployed. I don't have much opportunity to actually speak to people that will acknowledge my existence. It is what it is, it is no big deal. Even if I did have friends they would probably be stoners and such, being a millennial. I think this blog is partly a push against loneliness.  

But anyway, this is what I wanted to discuss. Science fiction shows. 

Maturation.

Fringe for me was a golden calf of brilliance. The first season, an incredibly mysterious opponent is set up. The Pattern. A group that for some reason, is doing random, very scientifically advanced, biological warfare on just random people often.  

The show sets up this kind of "pursuing the Illuminati" kind of system of deeply powerful clandestined groups. Similar to Alias in a way, but different. 

Fringe is good for a number of reasons and one of those is that the heirarchy in Fringe. The animalistic heirarchy. Doesn't place the toughest person at the top. Like a lot of those CSI types of shows. But, intelligent people. Walter and his son are given a lot of attention and reverence in the show. Since they are super high IQ people with a lot of skills in these clandestined areas. 

I watched it sometime in my twenties. Not even all episodes just about half the episodes in seasons 1, 2 and 3. It became mythologised for me as an amazing series that I wanted to watch all the way through. The reason for this, is that I wanted the mystery unravelled. I wanted to know what 'The Pattern' was really up to. Before I could learn that, I could not look at the entire show. I could not evaluate it because I wanted to see it through.

But now, I have watched it all. Yes, as you might have guessed from my write up here it was disappointing. 

J.J.Abrams. One of three writers of these shows. Is legendary for creating these absolutely amazing set ups. But his skill really ends there. One of the shows this was most true in which I have not seen is 'Lost'. Which had a lot of people so curious as to it's reasoning and then, the reveal was incoherent. This is a pattern within TV shows like this. Consider the mentalist. That set up one of the greatest serial killers of all time and unbelievably botched the reveal there. They later admitted the show had not actually decided who the serial killer would be very close to said reveal. 

The trouble with these shows is that when you set up a villain. You have no constraints. The bad character in the show 'Jessica Jones'. They enter the scene. They have all the resources available to them that the imagination and the audiences suspension of disbelief allows. 

But the show then goes on and any problems here. Anything that wasn't properly done or planned out. Becomes an issue. Because after that initial mystery. More constraints start to show up. 

If the show created a written alien language that cannot be deciphered. They have to work around actually suddenly deciphering that text if the plot demands it. 

If one of the negative characters showed a lot of intelligence. That intelligence has to be dampened for the good character to then win out. There often has to be emotional reasons that explain this intelligence deficit and these emotional reasons make no sense and are inconsistent. 

This happened strongly with Fringe. The reason that the pattern exists. I mean, it might make sense. It didn't to me. But the bigger problem was that in exposing the pattern. The original idea is that you are exposing a very powerful group. Filled with it's own processes, secrecy, huge amounts of money and competent employees. An organisation with many powerful individuals which would carry on even if one or more of it's powerful players was taken out. 

This is the kind of unearned sense of mystique that the pattern had from season 1. It was set up as this kind of organisation. But it needed to be taken down in two episodes or so, so all of a sudden it was just one ego maniac running it all from a warehouse. 

This... issue, has made me feel pretty crap about sci fi in general. The amount of planning needed to make a show that makes sense on this level. Surely it can be done? I think a part of the issue is that these shows have producers and things. So suddenly they have to finish up a show in a few episodes when they were not told that previously. Suddenly, due to ratings, a show will be cancelled. 

I suppose it is also a part of growing up. TV in some ways is a bit like 'intimate images'. It simulates human contact, but it can't go to actually provide meaningful human contact. Eventually, the limitation will become obvious. 

Two things I have done recently that have satisfied my need for sci fi from real life, not from a story. One is that I have been seriously reading and applying the Law of One. It has become a way of life. Two is that I have been having emotional shifts by paying close attention to philosophy. Philosophy is very 'adult emotions' linked. 

I can't see a solution to this. The 4400, Stargate, Star Trek. Almost everything has some kind of problem. Like I say, these things do not provide real human contact which is perhaps what is really needed. They do not satisfy curiousity either. Any real tools that provide evidence of something outside the mainstream have been rigorously suppressed in my view - there is no way to develop real psychic abilities personally. But at the same time we all do need a bit of chill time. Previously I have liked sci fi and people don't really change so perhaps this will not change either. 

What point does healing end?

This is my video for this post:

Youtube: Common Ego: This Question Exposed What I Missed About Healing. 

https://youtu.be/n3lqYXNYED0?si=iK2-ZE0r6JwVW4fR

In order to address this video. I want to talk about a few different things. One is gender differences. Another is the environment in general, in a larger societal context. Another is philosophy. 

It's an interesting question. At what point are we healed from negative experiences? 

Creativity 

Firstly, gender differences. Is my answer the same as the answer would be for a woman? Nietzsche believed that one of the highest goals of human experience is to transform pain into a useful experience through creativity. So, Johnny Cash might be an example of this. "I taught the weeping willow how to cry".

For me, this is one of the ways that I do process my experience in general. I will not go as far to say that I process explicitly negative experiences in this way. But it is the way I opine on the confusion of life. 

I have talked a little bit recently about separating from my half sister. I am not saying my half sister is any kind of abusive whadjamcallit. But I was listening to Richard Grannon the other day, who said that when you get into a difficult relationship everything becomes so confusing all of a sudden. That was the experience I had with her. 

One of the lyrics from one of my new songs goes: "If I wanted to enrage you I would take an interest in you". With my sister, I feel that any curiousity on my behalf is met with hostility. As though she labelled me as a sexual predator a long time ago. Thankfully, in our entire history, I have never been alone with her. You can see how this kind of dynamic would be confusing.

But this kind of thing is kind of maddening right? But there is relief in expressing this kind of thing creatively. There is something about music that can capture a subtlety here. It is HARD WORK, I find, creating music. Creating lyrics. A lot needs to be in a good place to create so much as a paragraph. I found gruelling real life work a lot harder. But, the effort does lead to something positive. Something transformative. 

BUT, and this is a big but, it leads to a next large area... 

Gender differences. 

If you have read this blog previously you know I am heavy on the Law of One. As I have theorised in previous blogs, that women are love and men are 'light' or wisdom. The more correct Law of One term I recall is Love/ light and Light/ love. 

One of the first articles I read pushing back against feminism and it's extremely confused gender roles was an article called 'Is there anything good about men?' That made the point that women lack a sense of individual creativity and inventiveness often. Women have not invented things like men have traditionally. This is likely due to the huge amount of solitude that is needed for inventiveness to take place. Women need connection and community most of the time. 

Creativity, individual creativity I would argue, comes from testosterone. As an example, Asian culture is extremely high IQ. But not very creative. They tend to copy things and perform existing instruments really well. 

But one of the strongest creative groups and periods was black men during the 1910's roughly. When they were still in a semi slavery position. New instruments had just become more widespread and middle class white women had access to those instruments as well. But it was only the men making the music. 

So from this perspective, I wonder if pure creativity is not an open avenue for women in the same way. What is the female solution here?   

Environment.

One of the unspoken assumptions in this video, is that healing itself IS possible. 

In my recent video on the human design and manifestor strategy. I mentioned that perhaps there is, in practicality, a glass ceiling. Sure, you can improve your life by doing your strategy and authority. But the second your improvement runs up against an entrenched power dynamic, a heirarchy, it stops there. 

I think that might be relevant here. You can heal a great deal, but the problem you start to meet is that society itself is quite dysfunctional and it might not be inclined to bring people together in a way that is healing. 

We are in a strange position as a society. Decades of propaganda which is perhaps starting to break down. Dysfunctional economies. Inflation. People are atomised as a part of this dysfunction. 

Sometimes when I have had an unpleasant health issue I have gotten resentful about something unconnected. A social issue from a few years ago perhaps. Then when my health has improved. When I have done exercise or eaten fruit. It has fallen away. Like it never existed and I have marvelled at the issue of how health underlines some problems that don't appear to be health problems. 

This, I think, is part of the answer. Sure, if we had someone screw us over in the past it makes us angry. But there are a lot of ingredients that can go into making our lives great now, that would make us not feel like that. If we meet someone new, or get excited about a hobby or career, or if we improve our health. If health was improved across the board how many apparent emotional and social issues would just disappear?

But there is a problem with that. The problem is that we are living in a situation of widespread poverty and ill health because people in power want it to be that way. Society is fractured and atomised for a reason. Because of a very deliberate propaganda campaign that cost trillions. 

Conclusion.

Of course, ultimately the answer might be more complex than this. But I think this is a good grounding to the question.   

The Christian message.

The last post I wrote, talking about Socrates message and potential negative influence, seemed to me to be confirmed in a big way by this synchronicity. I also wanted to mention a few more things I find just amazing about this video in general:

Youtube: Aaron Abke: Exposing Paul: The FALSE PROPHET who hijacked the gospel:

https://youtu.be/4jdfQ9YwqYs?si=EhP4mxp8n9VYL-94

At 48 minutes, James discusses Acts 16:16. Where a slave girl who is possessed by a demon. Follows Paul and his companions around for three days promoting that Pauls message is a good one. 

The discussion then clarifies that the demon that the girl was possessed by was a demon called 'Python'. That was an entity that was said to protect the Oracle of Delphi. The Oracle of Delphi also used the negative form of tongues. A negative and positive for of tongues are here clarified. 

The Oracle of Delphi is how Socrates got his start. Where he was told that he was the wisest man in Athens by said individual.

Because this was about a week ago, this doesn't hold any particular charge for me now. Nowhere near when I first heard it and had just put that last blog out. But this next part is something I am internally processing the significance of:

At one hour and thirty three minutes Aaron brings up this passage. I'm not expecting you to read this bible passage, I'm just providing context:

As for those who were held in high esteem—whatever they were makes no difference to me; God does not show favoritism—they added nothing to my message. ⁷ On the contrary, they recognized that I had been entrusted with the task of preaching the gospel to the uncircumcised,^[a] just as Peter had been to the circumcised.^{[b] 8} For God, who was at work in Peter as an apostle to the circumcised, was also at work in me as an apostle to the Gentiles. ⁹ James, Cephas^[c] and John, those esteemed as pillars, gave me and Barnabas the right hand of fellowship when they recognized the grace given to me. They agreed that we should go to the Gentiles, and they to the circumcised. ¹⁰ All they asked was that we should continue to remember the poor, the very thing I had been eager to do all along.

¹¹ When Cephas came to Antioch, I opposed him to his face, because he stood condemned. ¹² For before certain men came from James, he used to eat with the Gentiles. But when they arrived, he began to draw back and separate himself from the Gentiles because he was afraid of those who belonged to the circumcision group. ¹³ The other Jews joined him in his hypocrisy, so that by their hypocrisy even Barnabas was led astray.

Aaron makes the case that this is extremely narcissistic of Paul. Thisas his meeting with Jesus' actual disciples. That Paul admonishes one of them for some perceived error. That even his own friend Barnabas wasn't putting up with Paul. 

I have had conversations with Christians about these themes. Their dogged determination to not acknowledge, even when directly quoted, that Paul had a disagreement with Jesus' real disciples, and by extension, and also directly Jesus. Is pretty amazing. 

But what is more amazing is that this can so blatantly be in the text. Along with all the other things discussed here, and millions of people over decades, perhaps centuries, have not put it together. Have not discussed it. Have not appeared to actually process the bible in any meaningful way. 

It's just mad stuff. That such a lie, such a big lie, like the legitimacy of Paul, can go on for so long. That no one notices or says anything about it. 

It makes me wonder what do people do with their time? What do they spend their time thinking about to not notice this kind of thing? 

 

Odds and Ends. Socrates, negative wanderers, energy work, personal health.

I intend this as only a smattering of general thoughts. Nothing written out to any length.

I have been listening to Stefan Molyneux describe, in his history of philosophers series (which was offered briefly for free but is now behind a paywall). How unbelievably damaging Socrates was for society. I feel that taking Stefans argument about this would be stealing his work a little too much, so I will only mention some of the effects of Socrates rather than the flaws in his philosophy. But I think if the argument is correct, I will eventually reword it naturally, internally. It reminds me of this passage in the Law of One.   

Questioner: Then what is the motivation for the… Oh, let me finish that question first. What is the motiv— what is the mechanism that this unusual sixth-density entity would wish to gain to polarize more negatively through wandering?

Ra: I am Ra. The Wanderer has the potential of greatly accelerating the density whence it comes in its progress in evolution. This is due to the intensive life experiences and opportunities of the third density. Thusly the positively oriented Wanderer chooses to hazard the danger of the forgetting in order to be of service to others by radiating love of others. If the forgetting is penetrated the amount of catalyst in third density will polarize the Wanderer with much greater efficiency than shall be expected in the higher and more harmonious densities.

Similarly, the negatively oriented Wanderer dares to hazard the forgetting in order that it might accelerate its progress in evolution in its own density by serving itself in third density by offering to other-selves the opportunity to hear the information having to do with negative polarization.

36.18 Questioner: Are there any examples of sixth-density negatively polarized Wanderers in our historical past?

Ra: I am Ra. This information could be harmful. We withhold it. Please attempt to view the entities about you as part of the Creator. We can explain no further.

 So after Socrates did his "wise sage of infinity" sort of act. His arguments were so toxic he had two effects: A) His followers went on and became tyrants, ushering Athens into a whole new tyrannical society. As he indicated would happen at his trial B) The Socratic method, which is extremely unproductive and toxic. Disabled philosophy for thousands of years after his death. Philosophy, I think, is one of the real tools that the positive has against the negative. To articulate reasons/ wisdom why (and how) the negative should be opposed, is necessary for it to be opposed. 

Socrates career started off when 'The Oracle' told him he was the wisest man in Athens. The pattern of a "negative adept" being aided by a psychic of some description is one I have often seen in fiction. Such as in Alias. It was also the theme of one of my own stories when I was a young child and I used to make up stories. That a Law of One similar being called literally 'Oracle'. Gave bad advice to a lot of people due to free will types of concerns and allowed a powerful negative force to rise. 

I am not saying this is definitely the case. It is just an interesting idea for me. Of course it may be the case of a positive wanderer being confused and messing things up. As certain other figures were mentioned in the Law of One as being positive Wanderers and it all going bad. But the idea of Socrates being negative in this way is worth consideration I think. 

Personal energy work:

I mentioned a few weeks ago that I was 'retaining my lower energies'. I wonder, if having been weak in that area previously has been what has stopped me from doing energy healing?

The problem I have with energy healing is when I do it I feel like I am kind of dying emotionally. That things are becoming routine and boring. The masculine energy, the masculine 'zeal' I do think acts as opposition to that. And if a person is "leaking" their sexual energy, then the only function the energy work can initially serve is to replace that energy. Which seems like it is unproductive.

It is early days yet, I don't know. But it is interesting. Having stopped the kind of filth I keep returning to does feel very good as well. I DO feel better! My fantasies are not of a healthy relationship and missionary. 

I may have figured to stop chocolate as well. Which is a big deal for me. I have mentioned it before in relation to session 32.1. I find chocolate unproductive as well. I have found without it previously I have been way better and more  motivated at music for instance. Way clearer minded and tend to sleep better. 

The way I have stopped chocolate is to accept that I do have to yield to medication, for problems that chocolate was solving. Currently I am taking four different things. Including pain killers.  

Gate 56 and the Law of Free Will.

Eye is getting slightly better. I still can't see out of the left one, but there is a tiny bit of vision clearing up on the very most close things. 

This is a human design post. It is one of the really big insights I had a few weeks ago that I was not able to articulate as I felt too bowled over. But I feel that I now am, and also, I feel that there was a bit of emotion that I needed to process in order to understand this. That prayer and fidelity to the Law of One has connected me enough to process life a bit more emotionally which is necessary at this moment.

I am also paying attention to Stefan Molyneux's history of philosophers series. That he gave to his audience on his 59th birthday. What I am learning at the moment is that for philosophers, the trial and death of Socrates is a kind of "Crucifixion" moment. It is the warning to all future philosophers of the danger of telling truth - being executed by the state. This is surprisingly emotional. 

Anyway, that was just a random thing I was talking about, but this post actually features Stefan heavily. \It is very unlikely, but I have casually thought, or fantasized every so often, that Stefan reads my blog in his spare time. Just an eccentric thinker who values his work he might be interested in. If he were to read this post it might violate his free will though since I do went to focus on his chart and message. Since it is not likely true, I put the likelihood at less than 1%, it is a risk I can take. Since I am such a fallible source that can be easily dismissed it might again detract from the possibility of violating free will in this isntance. 

The head gates.

I have a lot to say about the head gates. In the human design. The top being 64-47, 61-24 and 63-4, then from the Ajna to the throat 11-56, 43-23 and 17-62.

The point is is how does the concept of free will interact with these? I think free will is strongly emphasized in the gate 56. I think this hexagram is where free will is expressed. It is, after all, the expression of the abstract information. Free will is an abstract concept. I don't think the 17-62 cares about free will that much only in where it is practical. The 17-62, the grounding of the logical circuit. "Does this thing work in the real world? Is this real?" Respects free will only as a practical measure. But really, when subjected to a scientific and logical process. Free will doesn't matter too much. Gravity exists whether we acknowledge it in free will or not. 

The 56 though, the grounding of the abstract process. A lot of abstract concepts are very true, very relevant, and utterly unfalsifiable in an objective way. Free will matters to the gate 56 because, A) it is an abstract concept in itself. That is free will. B) Abstract concepts literally can't survive without respecting free will. With the responsive force that arrives when people feel their free will is threatened, will blow away any abstract concept away with the wind.

One of the things I have learned from Stefan, one of his justifications of non violence. Is that once violence is introduced, negotiation stops. People yield to the violence, they no longer express what is going on within them. I would say, that Stefans message is fundamentally that ethics includes the rejection of the initiation of force. 

Here is Stefans human design chart:

Stefan has the gate 56 in his conscious Jupiter. The conscious Jupiter is what our message is to the world. Kind of like our spiritual message. This lines up very well.

But what really clinched the insight for me. Was that in my own chart, I have my conscious Mercury in gate 56.2. I had an insight into how most of my "insights" come back to the use of free will within myself. Respecting others free will in various ways. 

So I have the theory that Mercury is about those insights. That a persons Mercury placement is about the kind of insights they have in their lives. So my message here, my overall spiritual message is not about free will. I don't really talk about that much. It is a concern sure, I mention it in passing. But my actual message in all that I do is more along the lines of 'mutation', gate 3.4. These tools are tools that mutate a person out of limitation. I talk about the human design, dream interpretation, the Law of One, Stefan Molyneux etc. 

It was just a powerful moment when it all came together. This kind of insight to me shows the power of the human design, and the possibilities of using it. The possibilities of the kind of problems it could solve!  

What does the Law of One actually mean?

On Sunday. I had one of the more physically painful experiences in my life. Due to me having a medical device on my arm, which is an unneccessary precaution I will immediately stop, my elbow was raised and my hand would hit my eye in the night. So in the night it slashed my eye and it broke the very first layer of my cornea. Which is just a light film of the eye, which I believe, is a lot to do with keeping the light from hurting our eyes.

I went to the A and E eye department and they took it off. Because it was not going to reattach so the idea is that it now has to grow back. Nevertheless, the whole thing was extremely painful. I spent a good part of Monday functionally blind because I had to keep the second eye (right eye) closed otherwise it would hurt the left eye (the damaged one).

So this is my life at the moment. Recovery. A lot of things put on hold and a lot of things far more difficult and uncomfortable than they were previously. Being "locked in my head", I have been praying a lot and have been having some increased insights. I have also had an impromptu opening of my "empathy" or sympathy or something like that. I stopped listening to Stefan Molyneux call in shows because I didn't really get anything from them. I didn't feel a great deal for the people calling in. But I just listened to one that felt like it was breaking my heart! I felt terrible for the guy. 

The experience of pain has suddenly motivated me to want to remove pain from the world.

What my actual philosophies are about the world, if this changes anything, I can't articulate yet. I have been trying to create something coherent for a long time. Something powerful that practically helps. That might not be my place, but it is still a motivator. I might be meant to explain and showcase existing systems. 

Right at the moment though I have a simpler thought to offer. I have been thinking through the core of the Law of One. Not all the various bits of advice that I normally talk about. But the actual core teaching. Which is something like: you are all things, you are every experience, every emotion, every situation, you are the One Infinite Creator. I think it is session 1.7 this was defined.   

The first place that I can think of going with that is the imagination. I can do my best to imagine being a dog or another human in my life. I can imagine being a government worker, living as a child in an abusive environment. A dolphin (OK that's a bit hard!). Having breasts as a 30 year old girl.  

An application for the idea that I did just think of though, is that a lot of the time when Stefan is talking with people that have been through abusive situations of some description. The behaviour of the abusers and the many people that often surround that situation and do nothing is so fixed. Every day it is unchanging, and it is given the weight of an absolute truth. That undoing that seems to need a lot of repetition of the value of the individual being abused. 

For instance, the caller described an entire family of people that allowed him and his twin to be bullied for more than a decade by a brother of his. This caller had gone to the parents now, and they had apologised, and did seem to be making an effort but Stefan made the analogy that the caller was still doing all the work. If someone invited you on a hike  but you had to carry everything. All the water, all the food etc. You had to arrange the location and they wouldn't even talk to you. Then that would be seen as a problem.

It was not clear whether this was the case in this instance, the parents were making efforts. But it is an important point I think that does relate to the Law of One. A person after bad treatment could actually get an apology from the NPC, and having done that it feels like he should stop there. But in line with the Law of One. His value is STILL higher. These two are equal as beings, and the one doing the abusing is basically in debt. They have to do yet more, pay yet more, and I imagine it is a temptation to simply accept what is given. Accept any tiny change. Which in practice means they are on an unequal footing. 

I don't know how else the Law of One might apply. If I imagine being someone else. Do I simply imagine ME being them when infact they are very different people? What does it mean in practice if I am also currently a rock being blown down a hill in Scotland?   

Got nothing more at the moment. I am doing this with one eye! Which I also have to close momentarily because it is not used to the amount of work it currently has to do. So it is likely that blogs, if I do them, will be fewer for the immediate future.  

Update and Q thoughts.

Writing this blog following a dream. That is the only reason. A dream implied I was not doing something proper. Not up to scratch. So I thought it might be not blogging for the moment. It might be, doesn't mean it is. But if that is wrong, there's no harm in writing a blog.

The dream I talked about last blog. The thing I am taking away from this. The advice. Is to stop masturbating. I have tried many times in my life, very hard to stop masturbating. Never succeeded. But this was at a time where my medical condition was causing a huge amount of adrenaline to be dumped into my system. My health is better now. My testosterone will be lower being older. So I should be able to change this. 

I was only going to blog after 7 days of refraining - thus having more information on its benefits. But it is 2 days and I am blogging now for the aforementioned reason. 

It would be interesting to me if my health situation changed because of this because I have two root chakra linked issues. But, the reason I want the improvement is a bunch of things including having the energy for the gym.  

Q peeps getting excited:

There are a lot of Q posters jumping around at the moment:

Relevant to this is that most of the military accounts in the US have shut down. While this hasn't happened in any of the previous shut downs.  

The Q narrative brings up a lot of questions to my mind. A lot of things that relate to how we look out into the world are based on the idea that it doesn't suddenly change.  That we are not at a later point in life in a situation that is so far away from our current situation that we can hardly currently imagine it. 

One of the things talked about in these Q movements is 'medbeds'. The idea that concealed technology is a kind of bed you lie in which rewires your DNA and can solve any health issue including re-growing limbs. 

In such a situation. Obviously money and wealth will already have been taken care of. So the huge amount of energy that humans put daily towards concerns of status will not be so relevant. I'm sure it will still be a bit relevant. I'm sure, for instance, there will still be some people more skilled than others at certain things, and there will be jealousy.  

But I wonder if a big part of the reason people don't change is because the situations in the environment do not change and they are responding to those same environmental cues? 

There have been many similar bouts of exciteability among Q peeps which lead to absolutely nothing. When this happens. They don't acknowledge this and just carry on the next day with their Q promotions. That's a bit maddening.

I think this will be the same thing. But I do think the moment of change is coming. Perhaps in February 2026 when Neptune and Saturn conjunct.  

A powerful dream.

I had a truly powerful dream this morning with an image in it that is so powerful it feels burned into my skull. This was distinctly celestial imagery.

This morning, I was wondering the significance of it and how to phrase it in this blog. Like, the angle I was thinking was that perhaps I am doing well. All the different things I am doing well, then some of the things I am not doing so well, that are obviously not too big a deal, if the higher/ inner forces still approve. Then, also, on top of that, the dream did seem to indicate to me a way I can improve. A distinct way I very likely will improve with this motivation.

But, I feel all that information will strangle the inspiration somewhat. There are a lot of things that are distinctly going well. But if I were to write out all the six or more things it COULD be, I will be getting lost in the minutea. I might even be writing out a few things that I think are good, but are not actually good at all. 

So for the moment I will just sit with the experience, with the insight, in a sense; and let it filter through me, until I learn better what I want to express. This has happened a few times recently, insights so profound I simply can't practically/ immediately use them, and I think they will likely come out slowly over years, or be a precursor to later knowledge. But at the moment I suppose the term might be overwhelm. 

Why don't Christians Heal/ Modern sensitivity.

Things have suddenly shifted for me. As such this is a bit more of a less structured blog post. My energy is in a bit of a new place. For a couple of weeks I have had to expend energy but now, the thing I was doing has been done. I am relaxing and I had absolutely no idea that I was so anxious before this. For the past few weeks I have watched between 1 and 2 Fringe episodes per day. 3 on rare occasions. Yesterday, because I felt relaxed and I am recharging, I watched 7 episodes! 

This kind of thing really makes me think about how powerless I am in my life in general. I would say how powerless 'we' are, but I can't really speak for others. My impression is this relates to quite a lot of people. But I had no idea that for weeks I couldn't really relax. I just wasn't consciously aware until I did relax, and as such, in a way this was the most important thing happening in my life. While spiritual things I talked about were relevant. One of the larger lessons appears to be our relative powerlessness against what is going on in our lives. 

Anyway, many things to say. I realise, I will not say as many as I expected to. I will probably keep it kind of brief. 

First, is that for me personally, I am being drawn off various online places due to censorship from various sensitive people. I was censored on Pearl Davis' livestream yesterday. It was nothing insulting I assure you. Most of what I get censored for are just intellectual insights that people do not like. Like the following. This is when I went back on a Steven Cambian video recently and left this comment:

Two Law of One points. A) The Law of One explicitly talked against LSD in relation to Carla and I think, by implication, for many spiritual seekers in session 32.1. The justification is that the person we are naturally is perfect, is the Creator, and doesn't need to be changed with "harsh chemicals". B) The Law of One does not state that cancer is in all cases the "fault" of the person getting it as you have claimed/ summarised. The entire story is nuanced, and much of the Law of One comes back to statements like 'there is no best' and referencing the mystery of everything and our inability to really know what is going on "in this density". But session 73.19 among others talks explicitly against the idea that all cancers are curable.

I can see why Llresearch allegedly told David to not represent their work in his presentations. He butchers the quotes real bad.

Also, I wonder what perspective you are coming from as a Christian in this matter? One of the things about Christianity that I have wondered is why there is such a glaring difference between what Jesus taught on healing and what Christians today practice and apparently believe? Jesus said explicitly that his disciples should be able to heal and should do it regularly "When you go to a town, heal the sick among them and accept the food they give you". It would seem from a Christian perspective that diseases in general should be amenable to some sort of energy healing, that should be healable by modern day Christians? Unless I have misinterpreted these passages? It seems your perspective is more in line with a secular interpretation.

It is likely that last point is the one that Steven did not like. If you are challenging other peoples beliefs, as Steven was challenging the Law of One, by making a truth claim, then it is fair game to look critically at the truth claim you are making. With Steven it is 'Christianity is correct', of which he has ignored other challenges such as his 'test of a Prophet) claims. But there are many different truth claims from him and other Creators. 

It just feels like people in general are excessively sensitive. It just is the way the world is at the moment. Or I have become more articulate at challenging others? But it is clear to me I cannot relate to Pearl or Steven if I am going to be censored. I don't really put up with censorship of my contributions. In theory, if it makes sense from my perspective then I would let it go; in theory. If the other person is in a position of disproportionate power (like Twitter historically) I do let it go as well. But I have never been censored for a reason that makes sense to my perspective. It has, each and every time, been what I consider a minor abuse of power by the moderator of whatever outlet.

Anyway, I wanted to carry on on that point and end it on what I think might be relevant to the last point there. It is a fair point from a mainstream Christian perspective. But it loses it's purchase once you bring in a Law of One perspective. 

I have noticed that the Law of One mentioned a few characters positively. Benjamin Franklin, Thomas Jefferson and Albert Schweitzer. All were big on real world service. Schweitzer is a really interesting one and he is called a 'healer' but he worked exclusively as a medical doctor.  Schweitzers brief section also mentioned that he gained in green ray energy by working with the organ. I have not previously fitted in playing an instrument to the overall service to others and Law of One paradigm. 

Anyway, I am getting off track. Those three individuals, amongst only a small handful that the Law of One mentioned positively. All have their own interpretation of Christianity. Franklin and Jefferson took Jesus as a philosopher and rejected any records of supernatural abilities. Schweitzer had some ideas on Jesus that I have not yet understood despite reading. But they were different enough from the church that he was almost prevented from missionary work, and was banned from preaching in Africa, only allowed to work in a medical capacity.  

I just think that is interesting. The relevant information on Christianity and healing adds up to an answer to why Christians don't heal in my view. Plus information on free will and a few other points.  

Love in a natural society.

A strange one today that I was not aware I was going to write about ten minutes ago. 

One of my big insights in life has been to do with people and densities. Like, how people are from if they are fourth, fifth or sixth density. Another, that goes along with this, has been the statement from the Law of One that people are either wisdom, power or love. These were modelled by Don, Jim and Carla respectively. 

Along with these I obviously notice patterns in people. Most women are the love element and most men are either power or wisdom. Not all, several examples to the contrary. But there is a large gender skew in my perception. 

So I have correlated a little the "love" people. I had a friend who killed herself. A half sister. My mother. An acquaintance. There was actually a very unpleasant one I knew in a previous job. This is just my data set for correlations the tendencies here will not apply to them all. Boomers won't experience it like millennial women will as an example. 

I suppose when I talk about this that 'love' element might not be relevant, I might just be talking about women. But I feel it is important.

Questioner: I would like for you to define love in the sense— in its sense as the second distortion.

Ra: I am Ra. This must be defined against the background of intelligent infinity or unity or the One Creator with the primal distortion of free will. The term Love then may be seen as the focus, the choice of attack, the type of energy of an extremely, shall we say, high order which causes intelligent energy to be formed from the potential of intelligent infinity in just such and such a way. This then may be seen to be an object rather than an activity by some of your peoples, and the principle of this extremely strong energy focus being worshiped as the Creator instead of unity or oneness from which all Loves emanate.

 

This line I believe is something that is unbelievably profound and largely missed in the narrative on the Law of One's teachings. It's come up for me partly because if I am to classify women as largely 'love'. I think even outside the element of the spirit/ self/ soul, there is a yin yang element, love and wisdom, where women are in the love section anyway. Then this line is relevant. As my health comes back along with my sex drive. I am seeing girls in the street and feeling extremely positive feelings about them. But this quote offers a bit of a way out of that. I believe it is a point that describes the entire dysfunction in our society. All of it. 

But anyway, if we are looking at the way a lot of these women are. There are some patterns in our society that have pushed them in a certain way. Love people are the same way. Wisdom people are the same way I would say, probably impotently expressing their wisdom without the power to change anything, and power people are as well. I don't know about the power people. 

Women then, due to DEI policies. Have a lot more responsibility than I think they would in a natural society. In a natural society, men have an overpowering need to protect and provide. They want to get resources to provide for a woman, and it is this fundamental drive that has built the entirety of society. All the buildings, sewage systems, water systems, lorry drivers, walkways, almost all of the inventions, the computer, the internet etc. 

However, due to DEI, feminism, taxation based policies and a lot of other things, men are not getting the benefit from these things. This has lead to a lot of false jobs being created. For a lot of reasons. One would be to keep women basically dominant in the society. Which also lines up with divorce laws and such. Another would be to keep women spending. Unhappy unmarried women are the best consumers. Women spend $8 for mens $2. 

I think the natural way women are they are meant to, or they would naturally, with their huge amount of emotional energy; create communities, and create babies. While the world has convinced them to abort their children to fill in google spreadsheets daily. This is far away from their natural state of being. Had we not had the current political system most of their admin jobs would probably have been automated by now. 

A young womans inflow is fantastic. The amount of people that want a piece of her. The amount of guys that want to take her on a date or be friends (it is an immediate raise in status for guys to associate with an attractive girl!). The amount of female friends. The parties. Her family as well. I think, in a natural society, women wouldn't work a great deal. They would do these things. They would be in a constant "love" state in a sense. They would have community, possibly religion, friendships and babies. A lot of their jobs would be easier and simpler. Aside from some few called to be healers and various other things. 

BUT, we are not in that society. I think womens large emotional energy and general instinct to relate emotionally is still a huge emotional responsibility. They still have people in their life that rely on them and such. But on top of this, they have a hugely inflated worklife. So they effectively have two jobs in a sense. 

Then add in politics. Leftism. Which they don't have time to research and don't have men in their lives that will tell them otherwise, and there is no power incentive since men have been disempowered. The power is so deliberately in womens favour, because they have more tendency towards leftism/ centralisation of state power. The men in their lives are often leftist anyway. Going on the pill will make a woman prefer a more leftist guy. There are a lot of individual manipulations encouraging this state of affairs. 

But the end result is that these women are just... Controlling. Their activities and "emotional labour" are not responded to with any real nourishment. The emotional energy is by it's nature controlling. It is more capable of that admin organising type of thing they do. A secretary is basically doing a mothering role for a boss. Where a mother would know all her kids football dates, the secretary knows all her bosses meetings. 

So they are both doing the best thing for their polarity and such. They are actively "service to others". But like the wisdom person, whose wisdom does not produce any impact or change. All the energy they expend doesn't get a good result back. So you add it all together and they are just super controlling. Their main personality trait is their icey control of each and every thing around them. 

Their leftism is a total belief. 

So I think when something does change, and I am a believer in QAnon, technically just "Q" and "Anons". The sudden breaking of this very controlling and depleted nature, I think this will be quite a stepchange and I wonder how they will recover from any sudden and huge political shift like this.  

The human design, Saturn, and gate 5.

As I read Ra Uru Hu various times. I am becoming more and more sure that he didn't get some things right. 

I want to expand on this. I want to put forward and explanation separating human design as a process, and the philosophy that follows it, unconsciously even. This piece of wisdom, this analogy I want to express, also applies to a great deal of other things I believe and is relevant to a lot of other areas. Power dynamics, narcissistic wisdom, philosophy itself etc. But the amount of things I want to express is at odds with my ability to express them. Partly this comes from lack of appropriate outer world response. My youtube channel, which is where those ideas would be expressed. Has not gotten many views. My last two videos in fact had zero! The one before that had five. 

Like, as far as life plans go, I can imagine one where me expressing that wisdom would have more beneficial effects (to me, so I can continue and expand the work) might be positive. But we can't argue against God I suppose! 

I had a dream once where I was giving a lecture on the Law of One and some other connecting bits. It was a good dream. I am not saying I should be doing exactly that. I might be destined for something else completely, like music, or something in health. 

I think if I did express that information though, and it were picked up and absorbed by people, it would open up the human design. It would show that these are the precise areas the human design gets very right, but this other area here is where a lot of assumptions have been made (and the bits that are right has given the system the mystique of infallibility). So people can work towards the correct information in those areas where I believe assumptions have been made. 

That is the case I think with some things I am thinking through. My conscious Saturn is in gate 5.4. My unconscious Saturn is in gate 26.4.

Most of the written understandings on these two placements do not seem to be correct. It vcry well might be so I suppose the jury is still out in a sense. But I will describe how it doesn't seem to be correct.

Firstly, I watch the hexagrams on peoples charts. I did this before I got seriously into human design when it was just the astrology. I noticed, when I had been attacked by people. Literally ganged up on, and moaned at by people. That the conflict I had with them. Not just the immediate conflict but the one that had stretched on for years. Was very well shown by their Mars placement. 

For instance, my sister that I talked about in the last post has Mars in Pisces, and the way that conflict has gone down definitely satisfies the definition of 'passive aggression'. I had a friend I got in political arguments with. Not even direct arguments but just issues on this level, like, he was a real believer in race politics. He has Mars in Aquarius. 

Another element of these interactions though I think is Saturn. When we have conflict with people, Saturn is involved I believe. This does not mean that Saturn is always right I don't think. Perhaps if we incorrectly label someone as being worthy of fighting with we initialise our own Saturn at them. But I have noticed it as a pattern. I have even seen it's activation in completely unjust behaviour, abuses of power. 

So to me then. This probably is very true of me. My conscious Mars in the gate 4.1. is very much a gift for conflict. Because it has the style of reasoned debate. It is a big part, I believe, of what connects me to Stefan Molyneux's work with his conscious Mars in the same hexagram. When there is conflict, I casually discuss and challenge it. I usually come off as the unaggressive one and since the other person is usually pretending to be less aggressive than they actually are it really gets to them. To get an even handed response back that simply questions their own - when they see their own as morally superior.  

But Saturn is a different matter. The function of Saturn anyway is a little mysterious. Ra Uru Hu's own statements on it didn't make much sense to me. He seemed to describe it as sometimes functioning and sometimes not and that leaves a lot of open questions. He describes it as giving a punishment to the person if they act bad and not giving that punishment if they do not. 

Not how I have experienced it though. As I just stated it seems to be relevant in our interaction with others. It doesn't seem like a purely internal thing to me. Quite frequently in conflict I summarise how the other person has behaved over a long period of time. Like, for a friend of mine I summarised he had cancelled about 20 times and various other things. This might be the 26.4 showing. The other person tended to argue on current events. One of them did have the 26 and he did mention the past, this person is in fact, very obsessed with the past and constantly brings it up. He has the 26 twice. But my articulation was generally better. 

This is at odds with Ra Uru Hu's summary of the 26.4.

What Ra Uru Hu says about the 5.4 is that it is a person who has a set of unusual patterns. Those patterns lead to genius. By accepting their patterns genius shows. If they are to not accept these patterns. They get health difficulties. 

My life at the moment is at odds with that in that my natural pattern is kind of working against me. Chocolate was terrible for this. I could not fix my circadian rhythm with chocolate. I'm very sensitive and the caffeine just switches it off. Even if I have it in the early morning. 

Where I am now is trying to get my natural pattern back to some semblance of normality for very important reasons. I go to sleep about 6am most nights. I have not been able to get to sleep before that, even recognising it would be desireable to do so. Also, I NEED to get to the gym. I badly need to get to the gym. Partly for health reasons again. I really love the gym as well. 

For me personally, this sleep pattern of mine is stopping me going to the gym. I need to eat earlier in the day than I am waking up to stabilise my blood sugar. I have had to cancel a few gym sessions from bad bloodsugar, which is linked to late eating.

It seems to me the human design would say that going to sleep at 6am is my natural pattern, and it comes, I think, from what seems to be Ra Uru Hu's theories which seem like a kind of belief in inherent divinity. We are all perfect and anything that happens to us is 'conditioning'. 

I don't know what the ultimate truth of this is. I don't know if the bad karma for me here was from eating the chocolate. Or the lack of discipline has upset my sleep pattern. But I think it very unlikely that Ra Uru Hu's own write up of this is correct. 

Reflections on forgiveness and narcissism.

This latest eclipse, in my view, was something special!

The Erika Kirk speech at Turning point to commemorate Charlies passing at the time of the funeral. Had her offering her forgiveness to the attacker.

Which meant that both Stefan Molyneux and Pearl Davis talked about the theme of forgiveness without contrition. I think this is a hugely important societal point. The idea that forgiveness without contrition is not a positive, is an argument, I believe a correct argument, that is struggling to gain ground. But hopefully with Stefan back on twitter he will reach a larger audience in his discussion about this. Pearl Davis was talking about it too.

It is something I am thinking about too. I have had the same dream again and again, the same upsetting feel to a same dream. I have explored easily ten different potential interpretations. The last one I explored was needing to take Christianity more seriously. Not that I don't but just making sure to listen to more Christian speeches and such. But it was not that, I got the dream again.

It is maddening! It is very positive and productive for keeping me focused on these areas.  

I have dreams back from 2017 and I have been searching the term "University" and "School" in relation to this. I hope as my will power is obviously focused on solving this piece of imagery I will be subconsciously aided in this. 

But one thing I'm thinking it might be at the moment is being aware of "narcissism" type of themes and handling them. It might be that. That might be wrong too. But if it was, if this is finally the right interpretation, it would also be this same theme. Not offering forgiveness without contrition.

I did so recently. I did not really realise I was doing it. But as someone that is disabled I am fairly weak in things like holding a grudge. I spend a lot of time alone. I reason myself out of taking past slights too easily. So I end up contacting people again. This is also partly when I think that I was probably not in the right due to my illness putting pressure on me and me acting in strange ways. 

Quite often though, the person in question does not like me, and is potentially frustrated I did not hear them when they told me previously. I am often told these things subtly. 

I had an experience like that recently. My half sister, I have tried very hard to relate to her. As I did I think I have identified a compulsive part of my psychology that related to things I have previously talked about here. I mentioned how I had this part of myself that tries to offer more and more information and reasoning to people (long messages) instead of recognising there is no real connection. 

Nevertheless, from the very beginning, since she was about 14, she started cancelling arrangements and various things. I used to give her birthday and Christmas presents and she never gave me anything. The entire thing has been an extremely draining set of interactions. 

The problem is, and I think I want to point this out in relation to the manifestor strategy. That my effort to continue to contact her and such, puts her, and many others I have had this same chemistry with, in a position of power. It's like the people on the Law of One forum. When I bring up something to discuss that I have learned through careful study of the Law of One. They can receive the information and offer their unresearched opinion as though it was real information, because I have essentially set myself up in a weak position by initiating. I am saying 'I would like you to join me in this discussion'. To which is the response is 'Yes, here is my enlightened viewpoint'. 

With my half sister, very often when I contacted her she ignores me and when we have been in contact, she has ignored me or cancelled some arrangement or something and I have broken it off for this reason. The last time we met, I asked her when we would meet again. This would seem, if we were both equal, a positive thing to prioritise, since we were not in contact for a while for precisely this issue, but she gave me a date and then cancelled later. Only after I contacted her though she didn't cancel ahead. 

The point I want to make here. Is that continuing to contact her has happened via a kind of forgiveness. Language seems to have less than the specificity needed. But I did not refuse to contact her because she had cancelled on me and been generally condescending and unpleasant. It was a kind of weakness. The attempt to negotiate from a weak position but not even negotiate. The lying to myself that such things can be painted over. 

The correct response, was for me to not give forgiveness without contrition. To not contact her. To not have anything to do with her. To stay true to the teachings that I have absorbed, believe in, and even worked out myself partially before I heard them. 

I did contact my sister though, and the response I got back was that she thought I was trying to sleep with her. That was not precisely what she wrote, but almost, and when I queried her on it she didn't correct me. I felt kind of sickly for several days because of this and kept trying to go to churches which were closed. 

But it is a level of delusion and hatred from her that I think has been going on for a long time. I also didn't have the energy to deal with it. Like, the literal energy. There is not enough positivity in the core relationship to support this additional negativity. If someone does this kind of thing, avoids meeting with another, there is a reason. I suspect all of my attempts to meet up, all my attempts to communicate, have been met on her side with this kind of hatred. Discussing with whoever, whatever thing I did which was somehow politically or socially incorrect that offended her. 

While I can't speak for this person precisely. My thoughts are that all the people in my life that made an effort to be unpleasant at some time have done so because they do not want to associate with someone like me who has a disability and various other issues. Such as unemployment. 

Part of having a condition like this is accepting that kind of thing to be true and not wanting to change it. That people have the right to be like they are and even if it is not 'fair' so to speak, to recognise that negative tools are not preferable. They are following their free will, their freedom of association. Etc. 

Nevertheless, the eventual truth is that sometimes holding a grudge against people for this kind of thing is really damn functional! Had I have not let go or forgiven my half sisters early flakey nature, a whole set of not particularly pleasant experiences of trying to be nice to her in some way would not have happened! I tend to think that going to the gym will allow someone to have a more healthy view in this area as well. Experiencing the conflict, without getting too anxious about it. 

But I do want to say that I believe, that even if things changed and all these people did change their mind and offer contrition. I believe it would be my right to not let it go and not see them again. That is where my head is at anyway. I haven't seen some of these people for ten years now and I barely saw my half sister enough to get to know her due to her avoidance. Why would I suddenly want to make that investment later? 

I mentioned narcissism a few posts ago in relation to one of those women that thinks they got more intelligent by getting a degree. That was someone whose teachings I did not rate. The below though is a narcissism teacher who is just next level. Rather than confusing the area in buzz terms, he talks about metaphors that we know are true, but the whole area is very hard to describe I think. The metaphor is true, you are richer for having known it, but you can't really get specific behaviours from it always:

Youtube: Richard Grannon: Narcissism as a Ghost Story ... Escaping the Shared Fantasy. Dated 22nd of September 2025:

https://youtu.be/TNA3oVPD71A?si=7PKSWIxXCdmdocWR 

Stefan Molyneux's definition of Love. Or 'The Simp Wound'.

"The Simp Epidemic" as Pearl calls it is something that seems to me to be absolutely unbelievably strong. In a left wing area, guys will not talk against feminism even behind closed doors with other guys. 

Much of the negative agenda, in my view, would not be possible without one of it's largest promoters. White Liberal Women. A fanatical belief in all deep state agendas that relate to practical mundane politics. So, perhaps they would not agree with child sacrifice to Satan. But increased state control and a lot of other agendas are A-OK. Even good and morally righteous.

In order to get this state of affairs. The Deep State knows it won't get the full co operation of men. It is not a possibility. It is not a fight to be had. But it does realise it will have to have enough men supporting white liberal woman and their very slightly less liberal cohorts.

To this extent, I believe the brainwashing is very strong and deliberate to get men to be 'Simps'. I think that the combination of single mothers plus widespread female allegiance to feminism and mainstream narratives. Creates this in a lot of men. Almost all most likely. 

I believe this happened to me. My mother was not a nutter. But she is not inclined enough towards working things out like political ideas that she has a lot of defence against some of the toxicity just floating around. I think, through various things, I was kind of subconsciously programmed to support a kind of female supremacy. 

As I mentioned in the previous blog, and something I have many more examples of. I, like most men, have experienced a fair amount of fairly deliberate female cruelty. I would probably have been a happy simp had things gone differently. But they didn't, that's precisely the point. 

But it combined I think with a lot of the spiritual stuff going on in my life. 

Social ostracism has been a big theme for me. That and the obvious lack of support that meant that it happened in the first place. Anyway, in many different ways things were not going well for me socially and I think I then reached out, for connection or a substitute. To Bring4th and started blogging there. 

This however, confused my energy field a bit. The alternative would probably have been worse. But engaging there set into place a deep conditioning, that I have talked about before; that I believed I was a "G- self to the throat' person. And a 1-8 person. It was all tied in. Supporting Llresearch. The belief in how spirituality should be and it's homogenisation. 

But recently it has been broken and I am still doing the work, still getting the effects of that. It is a single moment, followed by what feels as much like a process as an effect. 

The definition of Love. 

As I have mentioned, I have often had difficulties with women. The social exclusion is one thing but it is really more of a symptom. The issue I think is, that I have an unbelievably positive view of women most of the time. Even with regular red pill content, my brain just snaps back to "simpiness" quite quickly. 

There are a lot of versions of this in a sense. Breaking off with llresearch and anyone connected, since I was often talking to people that resisted me with their free will, is huge, and it is pushing the change I believe in a big way. Ending a lot of the difficult, simpy, behaviours. 

But the battle still wages on. Within myself I know the feeling of the 'simpiness' that connects with a lot of the more troublesome stuff, and it is a kind of reverence that leads in the direction eventually of wanting to, or believing I can, use metaphysical tools to attract women. It is a position of weakness, rather like how Nietszche described weakness, deceptive and committed to trickery. 

The real issue with this state of affairs is that a lot of times, I have thought everything was fine and a woman has absolutely hated me down to my very core it feels like. I consider this a lack of perceptiveness caused by A) A lack of information, but only partially, B) the Simp Wound.  

There are a few different ways I have gotten out of this state. Recently, today, I read a section of the Law of One. It's intellectual element really separated me from that dysfunctional emotion. Before I have prayed, and it has also been effective. There are human design things that are effective as well. 

But it is very relevant to Stefan Molyneux's definition of love:

"Love is the spontaneous recognition of virtue if we are virtuous".

The trickery:

I have heard Stefan talk to guys on his call in shows using this reasoning. Guys that are letting women absolutely walk all over them. I remember one guy who had been with a girl for 8 years, and then she decided to break up with him and get pregnant via another guy! 

So the question starts to this guy: "What virtues were you attracted to," and the guy struggled for what felt like half the call. It was probably only ten minutes but it was excruciating. 

The argument goes a bit like this, as I understand it. If we are relating to someone and they are following mainstream news. Their opinions are all the same as everyone elses. Then we aren't really loving "them". Like, if someone believes in climate change, and they read stuff that politicians write and repeat this to you, is that really "them"?

But if people are independent thinkers, then they tend to sit and work on their own virtues. Someone makes an effort to do something for you or has patience or some other thing, then we can recognise that and that's when love steps in. 

One of the things with this is that animals cannot have virtue because they do not have free will in Stefans understanding. Free will is our capacity to compare our behaviours to ideal standards. A dog doesn't do that.

Nevertheless, it is an interesting definition as a tool in the war against simpery. Because that simpy feeling is strong. It is not purely sexual I don't think. Love is most certainly not defined only in relation to our romantic relationships. It is also a need to protect say a family member. In Stefans narrative, there is a whole lot of animal bonding that happens that is not love. 

It is a difficult thing to consider. In the Matrix, the Oracle says at one point: "Being the One is just like being in love, no one can tell you you're in love you just know it". I think that is how most of the population sees the situation. It gives a lot of authority to our subjective interpretations This is how it appeared to me when some of that so called "loving" feeling comes through in the creation of music. But at the same time, it offers a framework that explains that feeling disappearing when I become more aligned with the Creator through various methods.  

Modern liberal psychological theory.

I am starting to wonder about the entire 'abuse' community:

Youtube: Psychology with Dr Ana: Dangerous Red Fags to NEVER Ignore in a person. 18th of September 2025.

https://youtu.be/HEsB2m_oi_Q?si=NzhPmVhTbHT_ieT_

I think this woman would consider someone like me a red flag. But what I think is actually happening here, is that these guidelines she gives are natural results of liberals forming an 'in' group and classifying everyone else outside it as "problematic".

The red flags she talks about: Self Victimized Rumination. Inability to take responsibility. Projective Identification of shame. Threats/ Vindictiveness. 

About two thirds of the way through this video the girl mentions that she thinks it's funny that Putin was falsely cast, as, what she considers a victim; because someone said that he had to go into Ukraine because Ukraine was planning on joining NATO. She thought this was funny and obviously not at all correct. 

It offers a very basic insight into her perspective. The mainstream viewpoint is probably mostly correct to this woman. Things like climate change, DEI and mass immigration are all completely fine and anyone that says otherwise is racist. Any deeper geopolitical analysis isn't really relevant. Any complexity in the overall story. It's just that someone is obviously the aggressor so they are the "bad" guy. 

Which is roughly I think the story that she would have been told about me in various places I have worked. I have been thinking about it a bit more recently. My first real job was in a supermarket where I worked for four years. During that time all the young people my age socialised with each other and I was strategically excluded. I was excessively positive and tried very hard to get on with them. This happened additionally with a close friend and a social group. Then a few years later in an office job. Where an office responded in the same way. Any new person I interacted with would stop talking to me. Like, not even say hello. 

Because of this attitude I have still not been to a bar with a mixed gender group. Not heard what women talk about and their perspectives and such. Now, I am not old, but I am not in my twenties, and the time has probably passed for those sorts of experiences.  

The women at these jobs have been women like the one in the video. Uniformly left wing. And if you think carefully about all her red flags here. They are all kind of subjective, and could be made to label any particular person you didn't like and had come on hard times. "Self victimisation". Are these the victims of the policies she supports? Guys who can't get jobs because of DEI and that she would not approve of their reason for feeling victimised? The same thing with threats and vindictiveness. When someone has been bullied they might want to say to others that if the behaviour continues there will be a concrete consequence.

The projection one is that people make other people feel like they do on the deep level... How do you know what people are feeling on the 'deep level'? I imagine there is some mind reading here and it is simply a very generalised label that can be applied to someone with right wing beliefs; or that is inconvenient to the liberal hive mind for some other reason.  

I have said this before. But the problem I think with women is when they refuse to listen to deeper explanations of why things are the way they are. When they take the moral highground. So in the end rather than going too and fro with their seemingly infinite energy in that regard, you simply take the role of the bad guy. 

This is the reason I think for a lot of the complaints about narcissism. The women all go for the guys at the top, who don't have the time for them. So they get incredibly angry that the guys they want won't act the way they want them to. (And they are calling the GUY the narcissist!) This is often when the agreement of the relationship was clearly stated short term, but the woman decided it should be something else. 

Women often sleep with the "narcissists". Then convert to Christianity and spend the rest of their lives shaming the guys at the bottom, the ones that don't get women, for having sexual desires (because they are angry at the guys at the top!). The entire female gender it seems with it's fanatical shaming of "incels", while I think it has raised to 50% of 18-30 year old men have not had sex in the past year and most of those are virgins. Due to dating apps encouraging the above situation. 

I have realised as the UK Online Safety act has come in that I was watching 'intimate images' more than I thought. I tried a few other things but after that I have stopped... fapping. It has been a remarkable change for me. There are a few other things influencing this. But it is a pretty good feeling to have a lot of my energy lower in my body. 

It seems to me much of the time that a more angry attitude kind of helps in this world. For instance, I post a lot on X, even though I get a like about once a month or so. But when the energy is lower in my body I feel more anger at that and I do not want to waste my energy on X. A similar thing with a lot of women walking about. It is better to have a generally negative emotion towards attractive girls, whom I don't have any option with, and who would likely go out of their way to bully me if they felt the need; than it is to have a light hearted positive and hopeful attitude that I might be able to get with one of them. 

It has been quite a change. The conversation around forgiveness without contrition and spiritual bypassing kinds of practices, which I took in when I was "spiritually ambitious" when I was younger, has as one of it's assumed truths that people are not entitled to their own emotions that are deemed by the collective (i.e. women) as 'negative'. This feels like such a violation in a sense. Feeling entitled to my own emotions such as they are feels like a true blessing and I truly hope I am able to maintain this change (Previously I have met resistance at 11-18 days and I am on day 4, but who knows if I can be successful when intimate images are banned!) 

Do people change?

Interesting video from Pearl:

Youtube, People Don't Change As Much As You Think (Call in Show) Pearl Daily. 17th of September

https://www.youtube.com/live/wDPseF601IM?si=51h85DRx33lPpFo3

I'm wondering if Pearls content will mature in a kind of spiritual direction. She is kind of anti new age I think, of thinks she is above it perhaps. So it might not be identified as 'spiritual', but I think this video is an example of the kind of subject that is spiritual. 

I have changed. The main reason I say that is because people are behaving towards me far differently now. For years I was extremely anxious. Now with improved medical technology I am just coming together well.

But I have not known anyone that has changed. Not a single person. I have not known that many people really. People are exactly the same it seems mostly, when I say mostly I mean always. I have, a few times, had someone reveal something suddenly quite nasty about themselves. About how they view the world or view me. But this isn't evidence they have changed, but moreso evidence of something they were hiding something and/ or I was not perceiving it. There is evidence of this viewpoint in their previous behaviour. 

I have their theory though. Even though a good deal of my change has happened for purely physiological reasons. I think that change is earned, and it is earned by following your kind of path in a virtuous way for a long time. 

For me that is the Law of One, Human Design, Philosophy, Meditation etc. Basically a spiritual way of being while gathering insights. I think this follows on that Christian saying that the way is straight and narrow. Of course Christians mean that everyones spiritual path is monopolised by what correlates with their own increase in power. But I think it has a more profound meaning than that, in that when we do what we are here to do. We only really focus on a small area. A small set of habits/ tendencies that we gain knowledge and power in and eventually EARN change.

This is partly because, to be able to use a tool to the extent that it is useful. Such as the human design. We need a lot of experience in the system. 

I do have personal examples that I have mentioned before. But I don't think that is suitable for the moment. 

The Law is One.

The Law is One. 

I have a lot of the time, as I have talked about on Law of One forums etc. Wondered about things like should we pray or send energy to those who have not expressly allowed it. (Via Free Will). I have talked a lot of different angles on this; from theory, to experience. ("When I sent energy to x person this happened"). There have been very strong reactions to said energy or prayer before. 

I came to the conclusion. Via both Law of One quotes, as I discussed recently, and experience. Most recently very much confirmed. That we are NEVER to send energy to others who have not allowed it via free will. 

I want to clarify that recently, I experimented/ hypothesized on this idea a little. My thought was "Well I know x, y and z person are NOT inclined towards my way of thinking before, but 'a' person perhaps is. So perhaps I can discern myself what this persons free will is saying". I did pray for the person... IMMEDIATELY shut down. I am one hundred percent sure never to pray for someone under this situation. You can for animals as the Law of One mentions. But for me personally, it is not a good idea to do so for people. 

There is also a psychic warfare element I believe. I think that if we are to pray for others, without respecting free will, then others can also pray for us. Even if people are not aware of it, sometimes their well meaning perspectives on what is right and wrong are unbelievably manipulative and counter productive. 

BUT, I have found a way around this. Where this comes from sometimes is when I am thinking about people I have an emotion and want to do something "energetically" about this. I have found a solution today. I think we CAN think of another person as 'The One Infinite Creator'.

Partly this is because it is mostly cerebral. It is mostly just having a perspective on a person. It is not intending to interfere with them potentially like sending energy is. It is just thinking of them in a different way. It also, unlike prayer and sending energy which places yourself above that person in a kind of helper/ lover role. Thinking of someone like the One Infinite Creator might just shift your perspective on them that they are in fact capable. 

There is a potentially sending energy aspect. Today, I saw a blonde girl who was beautiful and had absolutely massive cans. I could not shake the sexuality plus the feeling I should have potentially cold approached. The one thing though that did shake that feeling is the idea that she is the One Infinite Creator. And that, from that theological lens, I am equal to her. 

There are other things to think as well. Partly, when I am stuck in that sexuality mode, if I am the One Infinite Creator there is part of me that isn't in that sexuality mode and that awareness helps me flip out of it. In general, you also look at people that might play all perfect as beings who also have dark sides and such like that. It really opens the mind in terms of flexibility. 

This might be my answer.  

The giant mirror.  

It has often seemed to me that events in the world are copied in energy terms in the real world. When Trump was being targeted by Obama in reference to the Russia thing, in the same month even that he started doing that, I was working somewhere where I was targeted by the whole workplace in a similar manner to that. Everyone there just hated me. 

I think the world might work like that. If you think about it that planetary transits effect the mainstream circus, and those same transits come up in our personal lives. 

It's not a solid idea yet, but it strikes me that the left has been subsidised a great deal by things like USAID, and has been prevented from having consequences against them. One of the big reasons I think that the leftists have been so open about their murderous desires towards Charlie Kirk et al. Is that for decades, the deep state machine has cultivated a situation where the left are never punished for what they do. Think BLM riots. Whereas the right always are. The right get cancelled for the most unbelievably small things while the left scream bloody murder without pushback. 

Like I said as well, there is a great subsidising of all the leftists and their antics. Like, they are used to just being given money and they don't truly understand why, most of them most likely. 

I imagine a similar dynamic might be playing out in the real world. Subsidies of emotional energy and other kinds of support are ending. Consequences coming down for behaviour, on the left, and it's emotional corollary. 

Just a thought. 

Healing vs. Technology.

I am watching Fringe lately. Fringe is a fantastic show. Part of why it is fantastic I must admit is that I know from youtube videos and reviews that it does have a point by its end. A lot of shows are brilliant at setting up mysterious and interesting situations and villains, and then really badly screwing it up at the end. This is very lazy storytelling because in the beginning you do not have to abide by so many rules because those rules are hidden. But those rules that are hidden have to be coherent. Which they are not if the work is not done. It is a kind of soft abuse of the suspension of disbelief.

Fringe isn't like that though. The plot, until the end, makes sense. Strange situations where people do strange things actually worked out in the way they had to once the reasons for them are revealed later down the line. 

There are a lot of things that are good about it. The main character, Anna Torv, is a manifestor. Which allows the show to be more plot based (because manifestors are about what's outside them!). The characters are engaging but not overly so. John Noble has amazing acting and emotionally moving scenes. 

I actually realise it's probably better than any other show for me. Stargate, Alias, Breaking Bad, Supernatural etc. But it has got me thinking about science.

The Law of One discussed energy healing positively more than science. But I wonder, if the reason that we do not see healers like Jesus anymore, is that the way the Creator now expresses itself is through science? Medicine, technology etc. 

There is this subtle thing in the new age area of demonising pharmaceuticals, and yes, I am sure a lot of them are fairly toxic. But just like the way companies work isn't an accurate reflection of the free market with all the state based interference. Perhaps, science, is simply not emphasized for it's more fantastic things. 

We have been told stories of a man that could heal others by touching them, and that is a miracle, but perhaps, with a shift in perspective, we could see the hand of the Creator in a machine that does the same thing?

It is a potential reason to me for something I have been wondering. Why do people not do the healing of Jesus if that is precisely what he said to do?  

A fundamental change in perception. Law of One session 26/ 53.

In the Law of One physical books, a large part of session 53 is put into session 26. This is I think because Don was very intent on creating a coherent narrative, and session 53 gives a lot of answers about UFO contact. Whereas session 26 without that really doesn't give a lot of answer. Hence the title. 

Anyway, this was the section I wanted to talk about on this journey through the Law of One:

Questioner: Well, we have a large spectrum of entities on Earth with respect to harvestability, both positively oriented and negatively oriented. Would the Orion target in on the ends of this spectrum, both positive and negatively oriented, for contact— for Earth entities, I mean?

Ra: I am Ra. This query is somewhat difficult to accurately answer. However, we shall attempt to do so.

The most typical approach of Orion entities is to choose what you might call the weaker-minded entity that it might suggest a greater amount of Orion philosophy to be disseminated.

Some few Orion entities are called by more highly polarized negative entities of your space/time nexus. In this case they share information just as we are now doing. However, this is a risk for the Orion entities due to the frequency with which the harvestable negative planetary entities then attempt to bid and order the Orion contact just as these entities bid planetary negative contacts. The resulting struggle for mastery, if lost, is damaging to the polarity of the Orion group.

Similarly, a mistaken Orion contact with highly polarized positive entities can wreak havoc with Orion troops unless these Crusaders are able to depolarize the entity mistakenly contacted. This occurrence is almost unheard of. Therefore, the Orion group prefers to make physical contact only with the weaker-minded entity.

Descriptions of negativity: 

One thing about the Law of One is that it is uncompromising in its explanation of negativity in the way a lot of other sources are not. Nietzsche's expression of negativity for example was kind of people being weak. It wasn't really negativity per sey, but an attempt to deal with a bad situation badly, by making it into a moral virtue.  

There are many different explanations and to an extent, mythologies describing what negativity is and why. From the Human Design's 'not self' to the strange set of sins described by the bible such as lust and pride. I don't know whether I see the Christian view as it is often explained as particularly coherent.  

I do think some fictional works describe it better such as fantasy sci fi. Lord of the Rings or Robert Jordans Wheel of Time. And William Blake's work.  

You have the general left wing/ psychological perhaps zeitgeist. That people are only the way they are because of circumstance and we are all infants in a sense. One I will talk about as well is Stefan Molyneux's version of negativity. Which is a combination of hedonism and hypocrisy. "The root of evil is the desire for the unearned" he says. Like all of his philosophy the entire idea and description is very animated. 

But Stefan doesn't believe in any larger negative force at work in the world. Or at least as far as I am aware he has not expressed and articulated that. The Church is a bit of a joke when it comes to moral guidance and mainly focuses on men and "intimate images". Because women have taken over the church and they don't want to have sex with their husbands. The Human Design, like everything human design, is just kind of vague. 

But the Law of One, as with this quote, brings in a description of negativity like something out of a horror film like "Event Horizon". 

5th and 6th density perceptions: 

Stefan, I believe, to be a sixth density Wanderer. If you have not heard of this before I cannot go into what this means. I will just talk it through and perhaps it will make some sense and be interesting. I suspect any readers I have may be familiar with these concepts.  

This is a chart I made for one of my videos:

This is how the Law of One described densities in a sense. On the right you have the positive. On the left the negative. The black circle is where we are (3rd density). The fourth and fifth densities. The two sides are very separate. Once we get to the sixth density though, they kind of merge into one as the negative collapses and it is at this point that the sixth density has something about the negative that is relevant to it. I cannot recall the precise wording of that Law of One phrase or find it so consider this my understanding. 

When I read the line above, I felt like an understanding returned to me. What I am about to say is the kind of thing that upsets sixth density people I have observed. But I don't see myself as having that much emotional depth in a sense. Like, there is something about me that sees the world in a very cerebral way and the emotions that others have are kind of stunted within me. I say stunted, as that is how the world might explain it, but it might be that they simply aren't there. I don't think it is a deficiency it is just me. 

So for me, I suspect, I "hypothesize", that looking at the world in the Molyneux way. As a thing with loads of complex emotions might not be that useful. Identifying when a negative person is doing a negative thing beyond a very shallow explanation. I think this might be more of a sixth density thing to really have context and all that stuff. 

Quite often I have thought over stuff that just doesn't fit in anywhere as useful information. As something that I can get wisdom from. As well, there are a couple of things in my past that I think over. What circumstances came together for this or that, beneficial situation to happen? One of these is, while it might be a simple age thing, why did I used to be able to make music? Whereas inspiration is slower now. But I did make beautiful songs back in the day that did characterise the negative in a non empathetic way. As a kind of beautiful metaphor. Rather like the antagonist in the Crucifixion of Esmerelda Sweetwater. 

Am I trying to take in a lot of emotional complexity that is just not me? It is also the circumstances in my life that are encouraging this thought. There is less grey areas for me. Less compromise. My life is very styled along just being in this kind of positive space and working things out from there. No complex relationships. 

The actual quote:

I wouldn't even encourage actually reading that quote. It's kind of messed up and so negative it is paranoia inducing. But it explains quite succinctly that understanding how a lot of fairly negative people function is simply a fools errand. It summarises that weak minded people are often kind of psychicly influenced to do negative things. I imagine these kind of negative things are stuff such as 'child violating'. 

It may be that fifth density positive people do actually require engagement with the negative in say, putting together strategies for dealing with narcissists or something like that. I don't think this is the case though. I think those that deal with a lot of difficult things which are more nuanced, are doing sixth density stuff, whereas the fifth is likely more about just separating or dealing with in other ways the negative. 

It's a hard insight to describe. Nevertheless, it feels like a good piece of wisdom at the moment. That there are a lot of things in life, that you don't think about, that you will never understand, that you put them in the "service to self" labelled box and carry on with your life!