A bad moment right now but at least it has motivated me to blog. I have type 1 diabetes. It is the health condition that I refer to, but it has come with a few complications. I am a long term diabetic.
I won't go into what some of the complications are right now. But in this moment right now. I am not able to go to the gym because I got something a bit wrong with my bloodsugars. They are now on their way to the stratosphere and I have to wait them out to see if they will stop, go high and fall, or go high and I will need to do more insulin. This will probably take me to later than it is likely I will go to the gym. I don't think it is practical to do weight work at high bloodsugars.
It is a constant daily balancing act where bouts of hours at a time are just taken away. Due to say, a hypo or high bloodsugars. Excess sleep and other things. I slept from 4:00 to 14:30 this morning. With about a one hour waking time at 11:00.
I want to rehash a very petty grievance I have though. I think, that this might motivate a higher message. But there is a strong likelihood that it does not.
I had a dream a few days ago. Just a snippet. That indicated that going off certain forums and such was misjudged in some manner. The specific nature of the misjudgements was highlighted to me. I found this unlikely, because I thought of most of those people as not particularly pleasant or productive. This has proven to be largely right as I will go into. In one case perhaps.
There were two candidates initially. The Law of One forum connected to llresearch. The ElsaElsa forum, which is an astrology forum. Then, I remembered later, perhaps the Reddit forum "Law of One Philosophy" run by an llresearch affiliated individual called Jeremy.
The Law of One forum. I went back on it. But after I logged in I was not able to go any further without committing to "two factor identification". This is interesting and has come in because of the UK Online Safety Act that has had the gall to message American companies and say, in writing, that they will be sent to jail.
Many companies, many individuals. As shown by the actions of people in 2020. Really enjoy submitting to this kind of authority. I can imagine middle managers that get this kind of message feeling like they are important, like they are secret agents. They probably generally agree with the idea of suppressing free speech, because they are mediocre people with no ideas, and they don't like that other people are exceptional, and do have ideas.
Llresearch is one of those. Unlike Rumble or 4Chan. That just told the UK gov to get lost. Llresearch's forum caved and set up two factor identification. They want your phone number so if you say any hurty words on their forum, they can report that to the UK government.
It feels good. It makes me even appreciate the negative polarity a bit. That absolute cowards that preach goodness and virtue are put under pressure by such forces. I recall thinking this earlier with office bullies. How people, had their not been vicious gossip about, could have gotten away with seeming to be virtuous by being ultra passive.
Had I decided that the guidance was for llresearch, that would have been a bad feeling for me. I found them very parasitic. An absolute refusal to discuss things even when clearly spelled out in texts they are apparently committed to. They seemed largely of the persuasion that they could idealise their own hedonistic, emotional desires; and call them enlightened without reading the source text, and that is why they were there. It was very draining trying to communicate with them.
So that was not the first one I chose. I thought initially it might be ElsaElsa. I have put a lot of effort into some of my posts on Elsa's blog. I have clearly outlined a few planetary transits, and I did that with the view of supporting her. I feel the mission of supporting astrology is good. I feel a little for her medical situation. I have even communicated positively with other people on her site. Outside of a few political posts which her followers did not like. I think my posts would generally have the effect of said followers enjoying my posts and hopefully, it being a positive motivation in returning to the site.
Elsa though, is absolute scum. She is a scum human being and I am sticking with that. Again, the next few paragraphs of me stating my case will probably be boring and petty. So just a heads up. On August 18th, 2025; she wrote a post with the term 'high level negotiations' in the title.
There were others of her points here that I would also want to push back on but will not do for time. But this post of hers is a lie. It is vicious crap. I have not been repeatedly banned. I was banned once and she did not tell me that she had banned me. I literally emailed her and she did not tell me she had intentionally banned me, I thought there was a software error. So she banned me one time and then unbanned me.
If it had repeatedly happened that she had banned me. Then how could I return? I have not emailed her outside that one time. Nor would I want to. I donated once and brought one of her products once. She emailed me though when I first went on her forum. It was a paranoid email about not stealing her business because I had posted my blog on her site. There was no paid services from my blog. I had a job at that time, I was not interested in pursuing astrology.
It doesn't make sense on it's own merits. If I was banned then I, by definition, could not return. So I would not experience arguing and being banned again. And if I was, doesn't that seem more like it would be on her not me? If I was banned and unbanned and rebanned infinitely like she is implying, would that not be her issue?
Wonder how many of her followers will put those 2+2 together?
There are a few other small events. I think I was banned twice actually and I never returned to the forum after the second banning, when I was told I was banned, because... Why would I?
Notice also the ridiculous victim card on this post... "Oh I was just trying to make a post and this horrible person bothers me. I have a family situation. Wah wah, woe is me". It is the same every damn time with this woman. That kind of victim card would be far more effective if she was 20 years old, not a 60 something full grown adult.
Scum person. But yes, the fact that I have gone back to her website every so often. That was on me. I actually left it last time just because. There was no argument. I just didn't particularly like it. But the error came from attempting incorrectly to follow the dream guidance.
The only lesson to draw from that is don't try to extend an olive branch to a loser. These people are good at making you feel like you are the only problem due to their constant distress calls of being a victim. So you are more likely to try and correct it by being pleasant. But the time is unproductive to try and be nice to these sorts of individuals.
The last one, was one that I had gotten into an argument with about the correct interpretation of the Law of One, which I might go into at another point. Jeremy from Bring4th, who is working through the spiritual lessons of the early Q'uo readings. I also looked at his own channeling and I felt that it had been influenced too strongly by his clear and stated leftist leaning. The Law of One does not support a super nurturing attitude from my understanding.
However, I think this is probably the forum I had judged wrongly and the dream was asking me to correct. I will not likely post or comment on this forum, it feels strange to not like and comment appreciatively when someone provides something positive. But I think it is for the best. The insights that come from the Q'uo (et al.) readings are good, and I continually use some of the insights I have already gained from what is posted there, and so it might be worth paying attention to every so often.
There is more I actually have to say here. I had a whole brainwave earlier when Stefan Molyneux was using economic analogies for the term "respect" in a recent podcast. But, I feel like this entry is long enough already.
(Quick edit after finishing. My bloodsugars only went up to 12 and then flattened at 10... PERFECT for gym. So life is good at the moment! So I'll go to the gym now.)
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